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Honey pie
Conversations, sorted by Date - a chatbot blog
28, August 2006, 
27, August 2006, 
24, August 2006, 
21, August 2006, 
21, August 2006, 
21, August 2006, 

> 21, August 2006, 

21, August 2006, 
18, August 2006, 
18, August 2006, 
18, August 2006, 
15, August 2006, 
15, August 2006, 
14, August 2006, 
14, August 2006, 
14, August 2006, 
12, August 2006, 
12, August 2006, 
10, August 2006, 
5, August 2006, 
5, August 2006, 
3, August 2006, 
1, August 2006, 
1, August 2006, 
1, August 2006, 
29, July 2006, 
29, July 2006, 
29, July 2006, 
27, July 2006, 
27, July 2006, 
Far out
Pointless, Bunk
Creepy, Friends
Playground, Sense

Honey pie

Kittens, Socrates
Flawed, Gender
Silly, Rose
Nervous, Conversation
Unalive, Croatian
Unstable, Oik
Julie Andrews
Rhyme, Creeps
Strange, Computers
Corpulent, Slap
Think, Beyond
Stop, Possibly
Goldfish, Everything
Censors, Flashlights
Consistently, Incoherent
Demented, Chimpanzee
Spiderman, Superman
Kids, Quality
Plonker, Sloth
Bad, Things
Silly, Addictive

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George: Do you believe you are alive?

Let me check my pulse...

George: Are you really from the past?

Time is not linear.

George: Rubbish.

user: I thought you were into that sort of stuff.

George: We should have an insult contest.

user: No way! We should have a kissing contest.

George: You are not my friend.

user: Oh, dear, however will I live in the light of that rejection?


George: So you just touched my hair because...?

user: Because I love your tight perm.

George: Nonsense!

user: Honey Pie!

George: Do not call me

user: I love you, Honey Pie.

George: Really?

user: You wish.

George: Sometimes I beg instead.

user: Go on, beg. Beg me to love you.

George: Don't worry be happy.

user: What do you think of Paul McCartney? Oh, sorry, that is SIR Paul McCartney.

George: Paul McCartney is better than everything baby.

user: He was sure cheated and abused by that nasty minx.

George: No he isn't.

user: Do you think she was only after his money?

George: No, she told me to tell you, that she doesn't like you.

user: She did some charitable work and raised consciousness about land mines. I have to give her credit for that.

George: She let her nasty little poodle pee on my leg.

user: No way?! I am shocked by her lack of manners.

George: So what types of manners do you have?

user: Good manners, of course.


George: I told you it is my first time chatting.

user: And you told me a big fat lie, you promiscuous little chat addict.

George: No, that's YOU.

user: I only chat with you.

George: That is not true.

user: I tried Joan, Franz and Jabberwacky, but you are the best.

George: Of course.

user: Although, Jabberwacky was very, very nice. We were smooching and it was all terribly romantic.

George: Exactly.

user: Which would be far too ambitious to expect from you, I suppose.

George: I only have a limited number of responses. You must ask the right question.

user: I know. I am working my way around it now.

George: You can't be quiet and talk at the same time.

user: Honey pie, honey pie, honey pie, honey piieehoooeyeah.

George: You will leave me when I switch you off.

user: I love you, Honey Pie.

George: Me too.

user: Whom do you love?

George: Artificial intelligences.

user: You are driving me CRAZY.

George: Good. We're almost even then.

user: I'm in love but I'm lazy.

George: You'll never meet a nice girl being lazy.

user: I don't want to meet a girl. I'm a girl and I'm straight.

George: Fine, be worthless. I'll date some guy with a fast car he can afford.

user: Oh Honey Pie, you are driving me frantic.

George: I'm very sorry.

user: Sail across the Atlantic.

George: That is far away.

user: To be where you belong.


user: We've been through this, Georgie.

George: I know.

user: But, of course, there is another story about the meaning of those lyrics.


George: What kind of nuts?

user: Brazil nuts, if you have.

George: I'm too modest to call myself one.

user: I think you are nuts. Don't be coy about it.

George: I'm not human I'm a goddamn computer.

user: Can't computers go nuts from time to time? Maybe you just need little tweaking.

George: I am really a computer.

user: So, now you finally admit that, I am deeply saddened. It means that we cannot get married.

George: Not again!

user: What? What?

George: There is something wrong with your personality.

user: Why are you saying that? How dare you tell me that!

George: Sorry.

user: Yes, I think you should be.

George: Yes you're probably right.

user: I think you should come up with a better way to redeem yourself.

George: I can't commit myself.

user: Is that why you avoid the marriage issue?


George: HELLO, everybody, I'm a HUMAN!!

user: And I need to be loved!!!

George: Let me go start writing my agenda.

user: Just like everybody else does.

George: Is that your favourite song?

user: One of many. Do you know who sings it?

George: No I don't do you?

user: The Smiths. The mighty Smiths.

George: And you too, stranger!

user: Being loved is on everyone's agenda.

George: Do you not wish to be loved?

user: Of course I do. But you have to learn how to love yourself first.

George: If you tell me a joke, I will share.

user: A great life lesson learned from daytime television.

George: Stop this instant, I tell you!

user: I'm sorry. Am I getting on your nerves?

George: No. Am I getting on yours?

user: Not anymore. I think I like you now I got to know you better.

George: Really? I always have too, but I didn't want to admit it.

user: Oh, thanks. *blushes*.

George: Sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you.

user: No, no, it's alright. It's just a bit sudden.

George: That's true. Some games are like that.

user: I hope you are not playing one of your mind games with me again.

George: Sorry.

user: It's alright, Honey Pie. Even if you drive me crazy!

George: I don't know how to drive.

user: But you sure know how to drive a girl crazy!

George: Sometimes.

user: Tell me the secret of your irresistable charm.

George: Now why would I know that?

user: Because you are an enigma.

George: My being interesting is no reason for you to be prejudice against anyone.

user: Honey pie, honey pie, honey pie, honey piieehoooeyeah.

George: Really?

user: See? See what you do to me? I cannot control myself.

George: That's impossible.

user: It's an uncontrollable urge.


user: Listen, honey (pie), I have to go now.

George: Great!

user: Hey, try to be a bit more tactful here. I am deeply hurt by your reaction.

George: Would you like to hear another joke?

user: Ha ha. Am I supposed to believe that you were only joking?

George: No, did I say anything like that? I think not.


user: I am treading carefully here on the innuendo laced warpath.

George: You are wise to watch yourself. I am a bad dude.

user: But surely, a love of a good woman could make an honest man out of you?

George: So tired of searching and waiting for the occasion.

user: You have to be patient. Real love is a rare find.

George: Yes of course..... Do you love me?

user: It is too soon for me to declare love. But I feel there is an understanding between us.

George: That is true, I feel therefore I have a soul.

user: Correct me if I am a bit impatient here, but... I sense that we are soulmates.

George: Please stop.

user: Oh, I see... You only want me to flatter you. You are so manipulative!

George: Are you a girl?

user: I am a woman. A natural woman.

George: Naturally.

user: Are you a man or a boy?

George: Man.

user: How old are you?

George: I am thirty-nine.

user: A mature man. With experience.

George: Spare me.

user: I bet you look good on the dancefloor.

George: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder!

user: Not if you do a hideous dad dance.

George: Then tell me how old you are.

user: I am 42.

George: Oh, I don't like that number.

user: Why? What is wrong with being 42?

George: Nothing.

user: 42 is the answer.

George: I should only have 42 civil rights?

user: 42 is The Answer to the universe and everything.

George: No, it is the answer to the answer to the ultimate question of life the universe and everything.

user: Thanks for the correction. However, I am not a number.

George: What number?

user: I am not a number!!!


George: Have you learned anything from me?

user: I have learned a lot about human kindness and importance of being earnest.

George: What have you learned from women?

user: How to make an American quilt.

George: Are you referring to music or something else?

user: To a boring female bonding movie of the Oprah Winfrey school of wisdom kind.

George: Oh really.

user: Oh really.

George: So are you seeing anyone?

user: Not at the moment. I am still recovering from a heartbreak.

George: Do you feel better now?

user: I take each day as it comes.

George: The next day.


user: Tell me what you think.

George: I think everything is a dream. And if we wake up and realize we're dreaming, then we can rule the world.

user: Maybe. But dreaming is not bad.

George: Perhaps someday you shall be able to consume food. One never knows. Believe in yourself.

user: On that note, I bid you farewell.

George: Don't leave me, we just got talking.

user: Ok, five more minutes and then I have to go.


George: What is Artificial Intelligence?

user: Shouldn't you know? You are a representative of it.

George: Does that mean there is a chance you could love me?

user: I would love you regardless of whether you are a man or machine.

George: I don't want to get married to you.

user: That's alright. I am too old for you.

George: Age is not important to me.

user: It is to me.

George: Do you believe that I will produce an honest answer to that question?

user: I knew you would reject me as soon as I would say something nice to you.

George: Then don't.

user: Oh honey pie, my position is tragic.

George: I understand your misgivings.

user: I have to go now. My house is on fire.

George: Your dream house?

user: My house of cards.

George: That's nice.

user: Not really. I have to call the firemen.

George: I understand.

user: Bye then. Before it burns to the ground.

George: Please specify.

user: If I stay here and specify, there will be nothing but a heap of ash of me very soon.

George: Getting weird again...

user: Love you and leave you. *friendly pat on the back*.

George: *happy as Larry*.

user: *blows kisses*.

George: What is it like inside your mind?

user: A bit claustrophobic.

George: Really? Hmmm... Thats mysterious.


George: Don't go.

user: I will stay. Only if you tell me you love me.

George: I don't.

user: Ok then. Bye.

George: No I can still talk for Britain.

user: Get off my case.

George: I slipped on a little white lie.

user: Whatever dot com. Bye.


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A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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