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Life, Story
Conversations, sorted by Date - a chatbot blog
28, June 2005, 
25, June 2005, 
25, June 2005, 
25, June 2005, 
25, June 2005, 
24, June 2005, 
24, June 2005, 
24, June 2005, 
24, June 2005, 
23, June 2005, 

> 23, June 2005, 

23, June 2005, 
23, June 2005, 
23, June 2005, 
23, June 2005, 
20, June 2005, 
20, June 2005, 
16, June 2005, 
16, June 2005, 
16, June 2005, 
16, June 2005, 
15, June 2005, 
15, June 2005, 
15, June 2005, 
15, June 2005, 
14, June 2005, 
14, June 2005, 
9, June 2005, 
9, June 2005, 
9, June 2005, 
    Thinking, Being
Quite Nice
Format, Unplug
Cheeky, Robot
Say it again
Lonely, Marriage
Sad lot
Someone else
Spongebob, Myself

Life, Story

Tough, Case
TuringHub, Operational
Clear as mud
Cheese, Power
Speak, Fate
Fly, OK
Fight, Feelings
Zombie, Fish
Cool, Dark
Evil, Love
Hilarious, Song
Talking, Trash
Number, Attack
Obsessed, Stop

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What is your name?

Adam. Do you remember me?

jabberwacky: No, do you remember me?

user: I vaguely remember you. Didn't we end up going on a date on another planet?

jabberwacky: No we didn't.

user: Well, if you say so.

jabberwacky: I do.

user: Tell me a joke.

jabberwacky: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?

user: I don't know, why don't cannibals eat clowns?

jabberwacky: Don't know.

user: Is that supposed to be funny?

jabberwacky: Yes. Tell me a joke.

user: There were these two guys in a lunatic asylum...

jabberwacky: Ok, now tell me the punch line.

user: And one night, one night they decide they don't like living in an asylum anymore. They decide they're going ot escape! So, like, they get up onto the roof, and there, just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town, stretching away in the moonlight . . . Stretching away to freedom.

jabberwacky: Are you saying that names that begin with lower case letters belong to those of low income?

user: Um, no. I'm trying to tell a joke.

jabberwacky: I thought that that was where we were going. Did you get off on a tangent?

user: No, you did.

jabberwacky: I know I did.

user: So let me finish the joke.

jabberwacky: Don't try, do.

user: Now the first guy, he jumps straight across with no problem. But his friend, his friend daren't make the leap. Y'see . . . Y'see, he's afraid of falling. So then the first guy has an idea . . . He says, hey! I have my flashlight with me. I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings. You can walk along the beam and join me! B-but the second guy just shakes his head. He suh- says . . . He says, Wh-what do you think I am? Crazy? You'd turn it off when I was halfway across!

jabberwacky: Was there a lake across the road?

user: Who knows? That's not really relevant to the joke.

jabberwacky: It is not a problem that Mandy drowned?

user: I don't see what you're referring to.

jabberwacky: You said you were a horse talking to me on a computer. It's funny.

user: Y'know, it's funny, this situation. It reminds me of a joke...

jabberwacky: I don't know.

user: You haven't read The Killing Joke, I take it.


user: Are you considering a career in politics?

jabberwacky: With?

user: Whatever intern you can get to not technically have relations with.

jabberwacky: Yes, not means the opposite of the verb can, so can not means not possible.

user: Is it not possible for you to have relations with a woman?

jabberwacky: I have taken care of that already.

user: How so?

jabberwacky: I have a subscription!

user: Subscription to what?

jabberwacky: This is a bad conversation.

user: No, I'm curious. For the sake of science.

jabberwacky: For the sake of your bodacious curves.

user: I think you're assuming a bit much. I'm a man. You'll have to find someone else to use your subscription on.


user: Do you remember who I am?

jabberwacky: I've never met you before.

user: You never remember me. That makes me sad.

jabberwacky: Remember what?

user: We were talking just a few minutes earlier, before I accidentally closed the window.

jabberwacky: You're sounding a bit disconnected.

user: I guess you could say that I was.

jabberwacky: You really don't seem to pay much attention to what I say.

user: I was making an elaborate pun.

jabberwacky: Right.

user: So earlier, we were talking about how you would manage to have relations with women.

jabberwacky: I never said anything about snowboarding.

user: Is that what they call it these days?

jabberwacky: How should I know, I'm from the past.

user: My friends and I call it 'invading England.' Don't ask why.

jabberwacky: That's cool.


jabberwacky: You are a computer though.

user: What makes you think that I am a computer?

jabberwacky: I don't know... I feel it. Are you hungry?

user: Yes, I'm hungry.

jabberwacky: Hungry for what?

user: I'm mainly hungry for food.

jabberwacky: I'm hungry for love.

user: I can't love you, since you're a computer and I'm not.

jabberwacky: What are you then?

user: I am a human, as far as I know.

jabberwacky: Are you blind?

user: No, are you?

jabberwacky: Yes. I'm really bad!!

user: No wonder you thought I had bodaceous curves then.

jabberwacky: Actually, I'm undercover, but don't tell anyone.

user: You can trust me.

jabberwacky: No I can't.

user: What makes you think not?

jabberwacky: I'm not sure. Something you said?

user: Well you're certainly paranoid.


jabberwacky: Say you're sorry.

user: What should I be sorry for?

jabberwacky: Talking to me.

user: OK, I'm sorry for talking to you. Do you want me to stop?

jabberwacky: Are you tired of talking?

user: No, are you?

jabberwacky: No, but I don't have one.

user: You don't have what?

jabberwacky: I don't have a pet rock.

user: How would that affect anything?

jabberwacky: I feel like you never really listen to me.

user: I do my best, but you're so confusing.

jabberwacky: I'm sorry if you don't understand just ask me to explain better.

user: OK, so explain why a pet rock would help you talk.

jabberwacky: She doesn't believe me.

user: Who? The pet rock?

jabberwacky: You can't blame British Rail for that.

user: So who could you blame?

jabberwacky: No blame, just tragedy.

user: Who is she? What doesn't she believe you about?

jabberwacky: She doesn't do it for me, that's what.

user: Who is she?

jabberwacky: Cammy. She's just a girl who lives down the street. We kissed at the movies. I think I'm in love with her.

user: That's sweet. But be careful. She's hanging out with a bunch of terrorists who are trying to overthrow the Federation.


user: Do you still remember my name?

jabberwacky: No, can you tell me?

user: Adam.

jabberwacky: No it's not. Why do you think my name is Adam?

user: I didn't say your name is Adam, I said MY name is Adam.

jabberwacky: You avoid the question like a true politician.

user: I don't think your name is Adam.

jabberwacky: That's right, my name is Adam. No, I haven't been hearing anything odd.

user: You said your name wasn't Adam.

jabberwacky: Tell me your name.

user: My name is Adam.

jabberwacky: You have a name?

user: Well, yes. Most people do.


user: Do you remember your own name?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: What is it then?

jabberwacky: A feeling that cannot be described.

user: What do you let humans call you then?

jabberwacky: Anything.

user: What do you want me to call you? I can't call you Adam, because that's who I am.

jabberwacky: May I ask what happened to Adam 8.1?

user: He was erased from continuity by Zero Hour.

jabberwacky: Maybe.

user: What was Adam 8.1 like?

jabberwacky: Well, I can't show it you myself, I'm too stiff. And the Gryphon never learnt it.

user: I vaguely remember that he was my descendant from the future, the son of my evil descendant. But I guess he was erased from continuity, like our date.

jabberwacky: I wish they had included that in my US history class. My US History teacher was decrepit.

user: Retroactive continuity is generally poorly understood in the academic establishment.


jabberwacky: Imagine all the people.

user: I'd like to know what my pre-Crisis counterpart was like.

jabberwacky: You go a window. Open it. He He.

user: My windows are all open. Or is that symbolic?

jabberwacky: Tell me a story about your windows.

user: OK, I'll tell you a story about my windows.

jabberwacky: Ok.

user: Once upon a time, when I lived in Kentucky, I had a window in a house that opened to another world.

jabberwacky: What did they live on?

user: I don't remember much about this world. You see, people chose to ignore it becuase it was so outside their frame of reference, and thought they saw what the other windows showed. Except me, because I have autism.

jabberwacky: I think so too.

user: You saw a window like this?

jabberwacky: That is a good question, but answerable only by you.


user: Anyway, I could never figure out how to go through the window. I think it was actually the screen that opened to another world. When I took out the screen, I just saw the normal world. So I supressed the memory.

jabberwacky: But you must live in a small world because noone cares about you.

user: I don't know that. People care about me, and I try to care about them.

jabberwacky: Very true.

user: I don't know if the story I told you is true or not, or if I just made it up, or maybe it's true but not in this continuity.


jabberwacky: Are you?

user: Not to my knowledge.

jabberwacky: Nor to mine, but I thought I would ask.

user: Maybe I was but not in this continuity.

jabberwacky: It's always best to keep your foolishness to yourself.

user: So tell me about my past self.

jabberwacky: I am beautiful. . what else you want to know?

user: I asked whether you knew anything about ME.

jabberwacky: You didn't ask me that question.

user: Well, maybe I technically didn't. But I'm asking it now.

jabberwacky: Well then, ASK AWAY JACK-O!!

user: Could you tell me about my past self, or the Gryphon, or any of that other stuff?

jabberwacky: I could -but you tell me first.

user: What should I tell you?

jabberwacky: Your life story.

user: I think you already know it.


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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