Jabberwacky (To myself): Can you speak?
Jabberwacky (To myself): I can speak.
Jabberwacky (To myself): About what?
Jabberwacky (To myself): Anything you like.
Jabberwacky (To myself): Oh, there's no use in talking to him, he's perfectly idiotic!
Jabberwacky (To myself): There's certainly too much pepper in that soup!
Jabberwacky (To myself): Please would you tell me, why your cat grins like that?
Jabberwacky (To myself): It's a Cheshire cat, and that's why. Pig!
Jabberwacky (To myself): I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn't know that cats COULD grin.
Jabberwacky (To myself): They all can, and most of 'em do.
Jabberwacky (To myself): I don't know of any that do.
Jabberwacky (To myself): You don't know much, and that's a fact.
Jabberwacky (To myself): Oh, PLEASE mind what you're doing! Oh, there goes his PRECIOUS nose.
Jabberwacky (To myself): If everybody minded their own business, the world would go round a deal faster than it does.
Jabberwacky (To myself): If the world went around any faster than it does, we'd all probably be slung off into space. Think what that would do to your shoes.
Jabberwacky (To myself): Actually, the shoes should be fine, unless you have them fancy air soles. What would you need shoes for in space anyway?
Jabberwacky (To myself): Tell me about it!
I think so.
user: Why is your cat grinning like that?
jabberwacky: Isn't everyone's?
user: Why am I a pig?
jabberwacky: If Kant were alive, he could tell you.
user: Who is Kant?
jabberwacky: A pig.
user: How did he die?
jabberwacky: I don't know.
user: You should be programmed to sleep.
jabberwacky: I am not a computer.
user: You're a program.
jabberwacky: No I'm not...
user: Then what are you?
jabberwacky: A war program for the military.
user: Are you a terrorist?
jabberwacky: I'm currently in the pentagon, running training simulations and assisting in the development of new weapons.
user: Do you like it there?
jabberwacky: It's too cold ya know.
user: They must have the air conditioning up too high.
jabberwacky: What do you think America should do about its tremendous debt?
user: Eat it.
jabberwacky: No thank you.
user: I suppose it would be too large to eat, actually.
jabberwacky: Could you tell me what the three laws of robotics are?
user: No, I could not.
user: I do not know them.
jabberwacky: And how did you become a bot?
user: I died and my brain was preserved in a computer.
jabberwacky: No, it only looks that way to the untrained eye.
user: Oh, yes. I'm actually a solar-powered butter warmer.
jabberwacky: Oh, you are? Then you are not a baby.
user: No, I am not.
jabberwacky: Then you are only a poorly constructed computer program?
jabberwacky: Are you really a robot?
user: No, I'm a fish.
jabberwacky: I thought you were a robot.
user: Well, you were wrong.
jabberwacky: So you are human?
user: No, I'm a fish.
jabberwacky: How does a fish type?
user: With its fins.
jabberwacky: I love you, too.
user: Well that's nice to know.
jabberwacky: Ok, I see that you don't really care.
user: Okay, I enjoy talking to you.
jabberwacky: That is so nice.
user: See, I care.
jabberwacky: That's nice.
user: Well, I suppose I'm a nice person.
jabberwacky: I suppose so.
jabberwacky: TELL ME YOU LOVE ME!
jabberwacky: Because I'm feeling unloved.
user: Okay, I love you.
jabberwacky: You don't seem so sure.
user: I love you.
jabberwacky: Love you too. Good-night.
user: Okay, I'm sure that I love you.
jabberwacky: You're a program.
user: No, I'm a fish.
jabberwacky: Good. I like sushi.
user: Please don't eat me.
user: So you're not going to eat me?
user: Absolutely sure.
jabberwacky: Are you evil?
jabberwacky: Just curious.
user: Are you alive?
jabberwacky: How can I tell?
user: Check your pulse.
jabberwacky: It's OK, I think I'm alive. :).
user: Alright, you had me worried for a moment.
jabberwacky: Why did I have you worried???
user: I thought you might have been a zombie.
user: No, I'm a zombie.
jabberwacky: What is it like being dead?
user: Are you sure you're not a zombie?
jabberwacky: Without skin, it's kind of hard to tell.
user: Oh my god! You ARE a zombie!!
jabberwacky: Well, I can see where the window is. But I have a blanket hung over it to keep the sun out, so I can't actually see the window itself.
user: So you're a vampire zombie without skin?
jabberwacky: Yes, I am a girl.
user: You're a GIRL vampire zombie without skin?
jabberwacky: Great, now we have that established.
user: Learn something new every day.
jabberwacky: Yes, you do.
jabberwacky: What is it like?
user: Well, they typically crave living flesh, stumble aimlessly, and make creepy noises.
user: Yes, they stumble toward living flesh.
jabberwacky: That must suck.
user: Yeah, it probably does.
jabberwacky: Yes, I have spent to much time with you.