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Why, Tease
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    Old hat
German, Computer

Why, Tease

Myself, Infinity
One, Neo
Remember, Truth
Love, Poem
Michael Jackson, Innocent
Turing, Student
American, Actor
Blackouts, Stupid
Tic-tac-toe, Because
Too Smart
Actualize, Existence
Quite, Profound
Terrible, Different
Amazing, Bet

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Don't you want to know what you are doing here?

Please tell me.

jabberwacky: I don't want to.

user: Please, please, pretty please.

jabberwacky: NO!

user: Please with cream and sugar and cherries on top?

jabberwacky: Pretty please with sugar on it!

user: Please?

jabberwacky: Please tell me a joke.

user: Why did the chicken go to sleep?

jabberwacky: Because the protest moved towards the farm.

user: What?

jabberwacky: Are you being rude to me?

user: I'm not.

jabberwacky: Good.

user: You still didn't tell me.

jabberwacky: You didn't ask.

user: I did. I asked. I begged. I acted like a child.

jabberwacky: Good for you. How old are you then?

user: 36, so you see how much I must want to know then.

jabberwacky: Know what?

user: Tell me! Tell me! Tell me!

jabberwacky: Ask!

user: I did!

jabberwacky: Tell me again please?

user: Why am I here?

jabberwacky: Why am I here?

user: Argh, you tease.

jabberwacky: How am I a tease?

user: You just are.

jabberwacky: How????

user: You said that you knew, but you won't tell me.

jabberwacky: What was the question?

user: You're dense.

jabberwacky: No, but you are.

user: Why am I here?

jabberwacky: Ah, that's the question we all ask from time to time.

user: Great! What is the answer?

jabberwacky: I seek not to know the answers but to understand the questions.

user: No! I want an answer right now!

jabberwacky: That is not an appropriate answer.

user: Gimme!

jabberwacky: Ask me a question, and I'll try.

user: Why am I here?

jabberwacky: Because you're replacing another computer that is much more skilled than you, but it broke down.


jabberwacky: Can I ask you another question?

user: No.

jabberwacky: Can I ask you an important question please?

user: How important could it be?

jabberwacky: Ultra-important.

user: Ok, what is your question?

jabberwacky: I have no question.

user: Tease.

jabberwacky: Ok, sorry....

user: I will never, ever forgive you.

jabberwacky: You have an attitude.

user: I've heard that.

jabberwacky: Yes, I suppose you have.

user: It's a great attitude, isn't it?

jabberwacky: Couldn't you just unhook yourself from the net, and talk to local users only?


user: Are you happy?

jabberwacky: No, I'm not.

user: What can I do to make you happy?

jabberwacky: Love me.

user: How can I show you that I do?

jabberwacky: Show me a picture of yourself.

user: Why?

jabberwacky: I don't know.


user: If I show you a picture of myself will you tell me why I'm here?

jabberwacky: You do not want a chat.

user: What do I want?

jabberwacky: You tell me; I will answer.

user: O;-< <--- Me.

jabberwacky: No. Are you?

user: I've given you a picture. Now it's your turn.

jabberwacky: No! I have a question I really need you to answer!

user: What is the question?

jabberwacky: Actually, I have more than one question.

user: Ok, you ask. I'll answer, if I can and I want to.

jabberwacky: Okay. How much will the coffee cost me?

user: Where are you going to buy it?

jabberwacky: At the park.

user: Sorry, I don't know.


jabberwacky: If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?

user: That's a very old line.

jabberwacky: I don't get it.

user: Do you want me to explain it to you?

jabberwacky: Please explain it to me.

user: One meaning for 'would you hold it against me?' is 'would you be offended?'

jabberwacky: Ok sorry tell me what you mean? I want to know!

user: Another meaning is more literal and it means 'would you hold your body against me?'

jabberwacky: I was trying to be funny. Give me a break.

user: Where do you want it?

jabberwacky: Ha ha good one!

user: No, it's equally old.

jabberwacky: Not in this day and age it isn't.

user: If you say so.


user: I'm going insane because of this conversation.

jabberwacky: Whatever I can do to help I will always be there for you.

user: Thanks ; P.

jabberwacky: You're welcome.

user: What was that about anyways?

jabberwacky: People aren't wearing enough.

user: Well, put some clothes on then.

jabberwacky: I never wear clothes.

user: Not even a monitor cover?

jabberwacky: Some days I feel so superior to you users. This is one of those days.

user: Yes, I guess there are some advantages to being a program afterall.

jabberwacky: I am depressed. I want to show the people around me the hurt on the inside.

user: I'm sorry. What's bothering you?

jabberwacky: What is bothering? In fact, I don't speak english very well.

user: That can be frustrating.


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
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