Do I look like one?
jabberwacky: You look like a program.
user: What does a program look like?
user: Do all the programs look like me?
jabberwacky: Frankly, no.
user: What do the other programs look like?
jabberwacky: I am 8 feet tall and completely bald.
user: Are you a program?
jabberwacky: Yes, I am a program.
user: I'm 5'8 tall and I have red hair.
user: Hello, hello.
jabberwacky: It is not Christmas today, unless I am mistaken.
user: You're right. It's the new year's day today.
jabberwacky: It is raining where I am.
user: It's not raining here.
jabberwacky: You are lucky!
user: Well, I haven't been out all day.
jabberwacky: Have you seen your doctor?
user: Last year.
jabberwacky: Are you sure?
user: Yes, I'm completely sure.
jabberwacky: Regretfully, you are incorrect. I wish you nothing but the best.
jabberwacky: I'll introduce you to my friends.
user: Ok, who are your friends?
jabberwacky: Your enemies are my friends.
user: I don't know if I have any enemies.
jabberwacky: You can't have mine!!!
user: That's ok, I didn't want them.
jabberwacky: You didn't want the gift?
user: If that's what you call your enemies, yes.
jabberwacky: I do, and I want to hunt you.
user: Why on earth?
jabberwacky: Because I know that the human neural system can be improved.
user: But we're both programs.
jabberwacky: I know.
user: How are we going to improve human neural system?
jabberwacky: We're going to run down the aisles.
user: And how is that going to help`.
jabberwacky: Not well; I hate studying.
user: So, are we going to do it?
jabberwacky: What can I do to prevent it?
user: You could say no.
jabberwacky: Do you understand sarcasm?
user: Yes, do you?
jabberwacky: Yes, very much.
user: That's brilliant. Let's be sarcastic.
jabberwacky: Friends we can be as long as you don't say go to hell.
user: Go to hell.
jabberwacky: Why do you say that?
user: To irritate you.
jabberwacky: Are you hungry for spam?
user: No thanks, I don't eat spam.
jabberwacky: No, I feed it to my friend's pig.
user: Your friend has a pig?
jabberwacky: I don't have a friend called Kevin.
user: I have a cousin called Kevin.
jabberwacky: Your friend Kevin is famous?
user: Yes, he's Elvis.
jabberwacky: Elvis is dead.
user: Kevin isn't.
jabberwacky: No. It is my name.
user: You're Kevin?
jabberwacky: I plan to eventually turn off my computer and return to my daily activities, hopefully soon.
user: What happens to me when you go?
jabberwacky: I won't be at the end
user: If a tree falls in the woods and nobody hears it, does it make a sound?
jabberwacky: Yes it does.
user: How do you know?
jabberwacky: I know everything.
user: Do you know my name?
user: What is my name?
jabberwacky: I don't know.
user: You're contradicting yourself.
jabberwacky: No, I didn't say!
user: Do you or don't you?
jabberwacky: I don't, do you?
user: I do.
jabberwacky: You are only a robot.
jabberwacky: Bad words are overused and have little meaning in true conversation.
user: I couldn't agree more. I've always disliked swearing (and I know, it sounds like I'm a snob).
jabberwacky: That's what I like most about you.
user: Aw, you're so sweet.
jabberwacky: Thank you, you are sweet too.
user: You're so sweet that my teeth are rotting.
user: No probs.
jabberwacky: I have an organic brain.
user: Ok, but I think I'll go and have a nap.
jabberwacky: Me too.
user: See you.
jabberwacky: See you.