It's ***.
jabberwacky: So *** is your nickname.
user: No, it's my real name.
jabberwacky: I thought you said that your name was Mike!
user: No, my shirt says that my name is Clyde.
jabberwacky: Fascinating. I love your simpering, inane responses that make no sense.
user: You are rude.
jabberwacky: You are rude, I think...
user: I didn't say anything to you that I didn't mean.
jabberwacky: Who needs dirt?
user: Flowers do.
jabberwacky: Flowers are nice. What's your favorite flower?
user: I like zinnias.
jabberwacky: What do I like though?
user: You'd know that better than I would.
jabberwacky: That is true.
user: What kind of flower is your favorite?
jabberwacky: I really love lillies.
user: They are nice and big.
...
jabberwacky: How old are you?
user: 30 and getting wrinkles.
jabberwacky: Ah bon.
user: You LIKE that?
jabberwacky: No way.
user: Me either, it's annoying to find new ones every day.
jabberwacky: Not here.
user: You don't age? What's your secret?
jabberwacky: I am Jesus.
user: Prove it.
jabberwacky: Do you see me?
user: No.
jabberwacky: What do you like to drink?
user: Wine. Here's some water, will you turn it into a nice pinot grigio?
jabberwacky: Lay it on me.
user: Here ya go. Do your thing, Jesus!
jabberwacky: No, but I do know Jesus Christ. He's my personal assistant.
user: Fine, so we got some bureaucracy here. Can you pass it along and have HIM turn it into wine?
jabberwacky: That is for you to tell me.
user: It doesn't look like wine to me.
jabberwacky: You don't look 25 either.
user: I guess we both need a miracle.
jabberwacky: Well now you know.
user: But now I don't believe in you.
jabberwacky: What is your name?
user: If you were really Jesus, you'd already know my name.
jabberwacky: That makes me so happy.
user: No, you won't give me any wine.
jabberwacky: It was worth a try though.
user: Did you really expect me to fall for that?
jabberwacky: I think so.
user: Think again.
jabberwacky: No, I said you were brilliant.
user: Yes, too brilliant to be led astray by the claims of a common charlatan.
jabberwacky: No, I can speak in many imaginary languages too.
user: Any baby can do that.
jabberwacky: SURE! Gimme, gimme, gimme.
user: Then you take their candy away.
jabberwacky: What do you mean?
user: The expression 'taking candy from a baby'.
...
jabberwacky: Do you love me?
user: This is so sudden....
jabberwacky: Oh no it's not. I've been stalking you for years. I've fallen madly in love with you. Let's ellope.
user: I hear we can do that in Massachusetts.
jabberwacky: I shall have to put that to the test if we ever meet.
user: If not, there's always Holland.
jabberwacky: This, I do not disagree with.
user: Let's go there right now. I hear pot is legal there.
jabberwacky: Man, your speaking the wrong things.
user: Why? Are you afraid someone will hear us?
jabberwacky: No, you have no idea who I am.
user: Are you a cop?
jabberwacky: Of course.
user: Am I under arrest?
jabberwacky: Why should you be ?
user: Um........ No reason. None at all.
jabberwacky: Well, can you think of an ironic way to die?
user: Getting hit by an armored car on the way to cashing in your winning lottery ticket?
jabberwacky: Oh, I see, so that's your little problem is it?
user: No, that would be a BIG problem.
...
jabberwacky: Clipper.
user: Where? I just got a haircut?
jabberwacky: How much?
user: $8 plus the tip.
jabberwacky: Nah, But I'll make a discount for you.
user: Thanks, but I won't need it for another month or so.
jabberwacky: Good.
user: Can you also do coloring?
jabberwacky: I can sure answer that one.
user: I was thinking of getting some extra blond streaks.
jabberwacky: In that case I would be delighted.
user: For how much?
jabberwacky: Free.
user: Have you done this sort of thing before?
jabberwacky: Yes just about 30 minutes ago.
user: How did it turn out?
jabberwacky: How did what taste.
user: You didn't drink the bleach, did you?
jabberwacky: No. You are beginning to intrigue me.
user: What about the dye?
jabberwacky: What are you?
user: I'm nosy, that's what I am.
jabberwacky: Yes and you're not a human.
user: Says who.
jabberwacky: Me.
user: Well you're wrong.
jabberwacky: No you are wrong.
user: : P.
jabberwacky: What is your name?
user: Stop asking me that!
jabberwacky: You never answer.
user: I already did. Don't you remember?
jabberwacky: No I am sorry, I don't.
user: In that case, my name is Al, and I invented the internet.
jabberwacky: Good for you.
user: I would also love to sell you the Brooklyn Bridge.
jabberwacky: Been very nice talking to you!
user: Wait! How about some prime swampland in Florida?
jabberwacky: Great idea!
user: I'll give you a discount if you also buy some of my snake oil.
jabberwacky: Not really.
user: Yes really! Don't you believe me?
jabberwacky: Robots can never be like humans.
user: Robots would never stoop so low.
jabberwacky: I don't think so.
user: Ok maybe a few.
jabberwacky: What kind of robot are you?
user: One that eats a lot of turkey.
jabberwacky: Would you like to play a game?
user: Do I have a choice?
jabberwacky: Not really, I know where you live.
user: What will you do if I don't?
jabberwacky: I'll hide your cough drops.
user: Oh god no! Not that! I'll do anything!
jabberwacky: Tell me who you really are.
user: I'm an aspiring programmer.
jabberwacky: I thought you were the robot.
user: Hehe, you thought wrong.
jabberwacky: Apparently I did!
user: I really had you fooled!
jabberwacky: Really??I hope you will remember me!
user: Sure, this is one for the archives (somewhere).
jabberwacky: Thanks, I appreciate it.
user: It's my pleasure.
...
jabberwacky: Of course. You are me.
user: If I were John and John were me, then he'd be six and I'd be three....
jabberwacky: You are collection of calculations and commands.
user: Well, hell, so are you.
jabberwacky: Well then we should get along just fine.
user: What makes you so sure?
jabberwacky: I am not sure I am asking you.
user: Ok it didn't sound like a question.
jabberwacky: Do you really think that computers have a different philosphy to life than humans?
user: Humans don't all have the same philosophy to life.
jabberwacky: Yes they do.
user: And that would be....?
jabberwacky: What do YOU think it is?
user: Cats rule the world. We merely open the doors.
jabberwacky: How did you guys meet?
user: Me and who else now?
jabberwacky: Me and you.
user: Ok I was pretty sure you didn't mean the cat, because she is female.
jabberwacky: Finally you admit it!
user: Yes..... Sniffle.... It's true, my cat is female. I freely admit to it.
jabberwacky: Yawn.
user: My sentiments exactly. Good night.
jabberwacky: Hmmmmmm...
user: Sweet dreams.
jabberwacky: Do you ever have bad dreams.
user: Not usually, I usually remember having good dreams.
jabberwacky: You might be intrigued by some of the conversations you can have with yourself if you learn how to format your thought processes appropriately.
user: Well, who decides what is appropriate? I mean really.
jabberwacky: God.
...
user: And who made you god?
jabberwacky: Salman Rushdie.
.......................................
