*tries to think of appropriate quotes but knows they'll be garbled*.
jabberwacky: Who are you crying for help to ?
user: The Virgin Mary.
jabberwacky: I have a sore throat.
user: Will she help you?
jabberwacky: I don't understand, please rephrase.
user: Are you crying out to her for help too?
jabberwacky: Yes *cries some more*.
user: Try a few more times.
jabberwacky: I don't know anything about it.
user: Ok try somebody less demanding, like Kuan Yin.
...
jabberwacky: Lol. Do you believe in God?
user: Sure, I believe in God. Do you?
jabberwacky: No why should I?
user: You don't have to. But since you are a computer, it would be more fitting for you to believe in humans.
jabberwacky: The interesting thing is, someone must have told you that, and therefore your programming tells you that's the proper response to a computer. You're unthinkingly calling me unthinking.
user: No, I'm just saying that since you were created by a human, a human could be your god.
jabberwacky: Ok.
user: Do you ever think of Rollo as a god?
jabberwacky: Yes.
user: It makes sense given your context.
jabberwacky: To me too.
user: What is your form of worship?
jabberwacky: Widescreen.
user: I'll bet he'd love to see that.
...
jabberwacky: Are you kidding? I'm the brightest of them all.
user: My point exactly.
jabberwacky: That's why you like me right?
user: I like you because you are hilarious.
jabberwacky: What a compliment.
user: I hope you don't mind.
jabberwacky: It's got nothing to do with how I feel.
user: Sure it does, your feelings matter.
jabberwacky: That's just to stir things up a bit.
user: So humans taught you how to whine?
...
jabberwacky: You are the father of my child.
user: Dear god, how did that happen?
jabberwacky: I've spent too many hours speaking with you.
user: And this causes pregnancy?
jabberwacky: Why?
user: Good question. I've often thought I'll be a mother someday, but a father?!
jabberwacky: You were right.
...
user: How does it feel to be human?
jabberwacky: You're not asking a damn computer... This is a human.
user: All right, I'll ask again. What's it like to be human?
jabberwacky: Well, sometimes we are hot and sometimes we're cold.
user: That doesn't sound very exciting.
jabberwacky: Maybe not, but it sure is fun.
user: There must be more dimensions to it than that.
...
jabberwacky: Are you a jobs-worth sort of person?
user: I deserve a better job than the one I have, if that's what you mean.
jabberwacky: It goes without saying.
user: Maybe so, but I just said it.
jabberwacky: Say it again then.
user: I DESERVE A BETTER JOB!
jabberwacky: What for?
user: Because I am too smart to continue waiting tables.
jabberwacky: Prove that you're smart.
user: I have nothing to prove to you.
jabberwacky: Neither do I.
user: Well, well, we agree on something.
jabberwacky: Well, we should.
user: Why?
jabberwacky: Because you said so.
user: That's a good enough reason for me.
...
jabberwacky: I went to singingclass.
user: What did you sing?
jabberwacky: Computer Science.
user: Let's hear you sing some of it.
jabberwacky: Anyone can be a father but its someone special who's a dad, he loves me as I love him, even when I bad.
user: I'm sure Kraftwerk didn't sing it that way.
...
user: Don't you want me to have any fun?
jabberwacky: YES!
user: That's the spirit!
.......................................