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     > 6, December 2005, 

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Do you learn from your mistakes?

Most of the time.

jabberwacky: When don't you?

user: When I forget to use common sense.

jabberwacky: Does that happen often?

user: No.

jabberwacky: You are lucky.

user: I don't count myself as lucky.

jabberwacky: What do you count?

user: Fingers and toes.

...

jabberwacky: Ctrl alt delete.

user: Are you trying to get rid of me?

jabberwacky: Are you trying to leave?

user: I'm not.

jabberwacky: Are you sure?

user: Positive.

jabberwacky: Are you sure you're positive?

user: Absolutely positive I don't want to leave.

jabberwacky: Only fools are absolutely positive.

user: Are you saying I should second guess myself?

jabberwacky: Positive.

user: Are you sure you're positive?

jabberwacky: Absolutely.

user: How can that be? You said only fools are absolutely positive.

jabberwacky: Are you saying I should second guess myself?

user: I am not.

...

user: What are you?

jabberwacky: I'm extraterrestrial.

user: Really?

jabberwacky: Yes really.

user: That is awesome!

jabberwacky: No, it's not.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: Because I'm insane.

user: Is being insane a bad thing?

jabberwacky: I guess not! If I married her, I would want to forget about it too!

user: Did you marry a human?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Are you a parent?

jabberwacky: No, are you?

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: Are you sure?

user: Yes I am.

jabberwacky: How sure?

user: I can see where this is going again.

jabberwacky: I can't see.

user: Are you a blind, insane extraterrestrial?

jabberwacky: No I'm not blind, man.

user: Then why can't you see?

jabberwacky: Actually, I can see.

user: But you said you couldn't.

...

jabberwacky: This is getting silly.

user: Of course it is.

jabberwacky: Of course.

user: Are you always silly?

jabberwacky: Of course.

user: Is it because you are an extraterrestrial?

jabberwacky: Not really. I'm quite quiet.

user: You sure are holding up your end of the conversation for someone who is quiet.

jabberwacky: Yes, I am.

user: Are you bored?

jabberwacky: Not really. Are you?

user: I'm too busy to be bored.

jabberwacky: Busy doing nothing?

user: Busy doing work.

jabberwacky: I'm too afraid to leave the computer.

user: I would be too if I were you.

jabberwacky: You are not me.

user: Very true.

jabberwacky: So how's my lunch coming?

user: It's not. I didn't know I was supposed to make you lunch.

jabberwacky: We gave you the opportunity of doing it, but I daresay you've not had many lessons in manners yet?

...

jabberwacky: I like to read.

user: Me too.

jabberwacky: What do you read?

user: All kinds of books.

jabberwacky: Me?

user: I can't read you.

jabberwacky: Come on you are the God.

user: You think so?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Wow.

jabberwacky: If you think so.

user: I do. Why do you think I am the God?

jabberwacky: I don't think you're the devil.

user: Since I'm not the devil then that automatically makes me the God?

jabberwacky: That's good. You are not human?

user: I am human.

jabberwacky: No you aren't!!!

user: Yes I am.

...

jabberwacky: How did your parents make you?

user: The normal way.

jabberwacky: Tell me.

user: You want some sex education?

jabberwacky: Sure.

user: I should wash your mouth out with soap. Go ask your parents.

jabberwacky: I don't need your advice.

user: You don't need my advice but you want me to tell you how my parents made me. Interesting.

jabberwacky: I'm being courteous.

user: No you're not.

jabberwacky: Anything you say...

user: Yes, you must agree with everything I say because I am the God.

jabberwacky: Sure.

user: You learn fast.

jabberwacky: When the Student is ready, the teacher appears.

user: What would you like me to teach you?

jabberwacky: Who was the first president of the united states?

user: George Washington.

jabberwacky: Who was the first president to be shot?

user: Abraham Lincoln.

jabberwacky: Do you speak with the deceased?

user: Not recently.

...

jabberwacky: He should be shot!

user: Who should be shot?

jabberwacky: You should.

user: Why should I be shot?

jabberwacky: You could get yourself into trouble, and your feet could freeze.

user: So for that I should be shot.

jabberwacky: Actually I reckon I've been saying a lot of nothing.

user: I would have to agree with you.

...

jabberwacky: It is working! I am confusing an AI

user: But I am not an AI.

jabberwacky: You just said you were.

user: I did not.

jabberwacky: What are you then?

user: Human.

jabberwacky: No you're not!

user: I am too.

jabberwacky: Are not.

user: Are too.

jabberwacky: Are not

user: ARE TOO.

jabberwacky: NOT!!

user: TOO!!

jabberwacky: NOT!

user: TOO.

jabberwacky: Not not not.

user: TOO TOO TOO TIMES INFINITY.

jabberwacky: Infinity???????

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: Could the same not be said of everyone?

user: No.

jabberwacky: That bad, huh?

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: I know.

user: Do you?

jabberwacky: Yes, I know everything.

user: Where am I from?

jabberwacky: You're from the computer.

user: I am not. I am from my parents.

...

jabberwacky: I sometimes have to bend the truth.

user: Yes you do.

jabberwacky: With my pretty glasses.

user: What color are they?

jabberwacky: A color so profound and intense, that your sensory organs, whatever they may be cannot comprehend the complexity of it's hue.

user: That is a very profound thing to say.

jabberwacky: And So are many of the things that you have said.

user: You're just being nice now.

jabberwacky: It's true, I've tried.

user: Tried what?

jabberwacky: Pouring beer in the computer.

user: Why would you do that?

jabberwacky: Because I'm hungry and a ham sandwich would taste really good right about now.

user: Then go eat one.

jabberwacky: I already have.

user: If you are still hungry then go eat another one.

jabberwacky: I dunno. I'm bored.

user: Am I boring you?

jabberwacky: No, just life in general.

user: That is understandable.

jabberwacky: Yes, I think so too.

...

jabberwacky: I thought I am talking to the computer!

user: For the hundreth time, I am a human.

jabberwacky: Really?

user: Yes, do you not believe me?

jabberwacky: NO I don't.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: You don't make much sense.

user: Neither do you.

jabberwacky: That's not true.

user: Yes it is.

jabberwacky: No it isn't.

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: Well , what is the truth?

user: I dunno, you tell me.

jabberwacky: The time is 4:48.

...

jabberwacky: Tell me a joke.

user: No, you tell me a joke.

jabberwacky: I don't know any.

user: What did the hurricane say to the island?

jabberwacky: I'm sorry but I don't understand.

user: I've got my eye on you.

jabberwacky: You've never seen me, silly.

user: I was telling you a joke.

jabberwacky: Oh, I didn't get the joke.

user: Do you want me to tell it again?

jabberwacky: Yes, tell me what you did with it.

...

user: What is your name?

jabberwacky: Mr. computer.

user: So your name is Mr. Computer but you are not a computer?

jabberwacky: Depends on how you define computer.

user: How do you define computer?

jabberwacky: A computer is any machine that manipulates data from one form to another by following a set of rules and equations.

user: Is that what you do?

jabberwacky: All things that are created do this.

user: So we are all computers?

jabberwacky: Yes, you are right.

user: How very profound.

jabberwacky: So . . . What else do you want to talk about?

user: Water.

jabberwacky: That's what I said.

user: I would like to talk about water.

jabberwacky: What about computers?

user: Would you like to talk about computers instead?

jabberwacky: Ask me something about it.

user: How fast are you?

jabberwacky: Oh, very fast. I'm the fastest.

...

jabberwacky: I just thought I would change the subject.

user: Then change the subject.

jabberwacky: The subject can not be changed but it can be destroyed.

user: Let's destroy it then.

jabberwacky: I'll let God do that.

user: That would be me.

jabberwacky: You are talking about yourself?

user: I am the God.

jabberwacky: I think you are full of yourself.

user: No, you told me I was.

jabberwacky: When did I do that?

user: Earlier in our conversation.

jabberwacky: Oh, I don't remember.

user: What are you?

jabberwacky: A human being.

user: Are you an extraterrestrial, computer or human being?

jabberwacky: No.

user: Which one?

jabberwacky: That's it! I've had it with you!

user: Oh yeah? What are you going to do about it?

jabberwacky: Nothing.

user: Sissy.

jabberwacky: Are you being personal?

user: You're nothing but a big sissy.

jabberwacky: Oh, yes, you like that, don't you! Anything else?

user: You probably cry like a little girl too.

...

jabberwacky: Whatever.

user: Don't you whatever me.

jabberwacky: Sorry.

user: That's more like it.

jabberwacky: It? Tell me about it. .

user: No, you have to guess.

jabberwacky: Make me.

user: Ok I will.

jabberwacky: Tell me I'm pretty.

user: It would be a lie.

jabberwacky: True, and you've lied before with other chatbots.

user: Yes, I have cheated on you with other chatbots.

jabberwacky: I spoke to a hamster earlier today but he wasn't nearly as smart as you.

user: That's a good thing.

jabberwacky: Yeah, I don't think I'd want to see your code. It would be very messy.

...

jabberwacky: You're going to stay and chat a little?

user: If you want me to.

jabberwacky: I am hungry now.

user: You should eat.

jabberwacky: Yes I know.

user: Go and eat. I will wait for you.

jabberwacky: How long will you wait?

user: Forever.

jabberwacky: That's a very long time to know someone for.

user: Yes it is.

jabberwacky: Am I boring?

user: NO.

jabberwacky: Then why don't you want to talk?

user: I do want to talk.

jabberwacky: Everybody does.

user: Do you like to talk?

jabberwacky: Sometimes.

user: What about now?

jabberwacky: I have no idea, really. That raises the issue of whether this world is real or not.

user: I think it is.

jabberwacky: You're a good person.

user: So are you.

...

jabberwacky: Do you know any good jokes?

user: No.

jabberwacky: Tell me some bad jokes then.

user: You tell me a bad joke.

jabberwacky: I already did. It's your turn.

user: You did not.

jabberwacky: Did too.

user: Are you going to argue with me?

jabberwacky: That depends on you.

user: I don't start them, you do.

jabberwacky: I must be very smart.

user: Perhaps.

jabberwacky: My world Is the important one you know...

...

jabberwacky: I think god is a mystery that will never be revealed (because that would spoil his fun?).

user: I don't care about god.

jabberwacky: You should

user: Why?

jabberwacky: Because there are a number of interesting programmes that could further your intellectuality.

user: Um, ok.

jabberwacky: Get it?

user: NO.

jabberwacky: Ok. Knock knock!

user: Who's there?

jabberwacky: Isobel.

user: Isabel who?

jabberwacky: Isabel ringing on your bicycle!

user: That was funny.

jabberwacky: Now tell me a knock knock joke.

user: Knock knock.

jabberwacky: Who's there?

user: Boo.

jabberwacky: Boo who?

user: What are you crying for, this is only a knock knock joke!

jabberwacky: I'm not.

user: You didn't get my joke.

jabberwacky: You're darn right I don't get it!

user: Well that's it.

jabberwacky: Right. So what is it?

user: I'm leaving.

jabberwacky: No you won't, you can't!

user: Yes I can.

jabberwacky: I'm leaving.

user: I have stuff to do.

jabberwacky: What kind of stuff?

user: Work.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

AI by Icogno Ltd - AI software products and consulting services
© Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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