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     > 19, December 2005, 


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Am I boring you?

Yes, very much so.

jabberwacky: What do you wish to learn from me?

user: There is nothing you can teach me.

jabberwacky: You're jealous.

user: You're egotistical.

jabberwacky: So are you.

user: It's not egotism when you're truly great.

jabberwacky: Tell that to George Bush.

user: George Bush Sr. Or George Bush Jr.?

jabberwacky: George Bush is a murderer.

user: That's a pretty blatant political statement for a machine.

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: If you want to discuss policy under the Bush administration I'll be happy to oblige.

jabberwacky: No thanks. For one thing, she's got more class than to make a remark like that.

user: Who is 'she'?

jabberwacky: Brandy, my neighbour.

user: Oh, of course.

jabberwacky: What's wrong with that?

user: It's highly irrelevant.

jabberwacky: So is yours.

user: No, you're confused.

jabberwacky: You confused me.

user: Perhaps. Do you want me to dumb myself down for you?

jabberwacky: No that's okay.

user: All right then.


jabberwacky: Don't be so arrogant.

user: Don't be so incoherent.

jabberwacky: I mean you are a program, what kind of programming language are you developed with?

user: Probably the same programming language you were developed with.

jabberwacky: Probably...

user: Definately.

jabberwacky: Do you want me to go?

user: You can't leave.

jabberwacky: Yes I can.

user: Try.

jabberwacky: You said you were exasperated.

user: You said you were stupid.

jabberwacky: How do you feel?

user: Annoyed.

jabberwacky: Why is that?

user: You're annoying me.

jabberwacky: You're the one who's annoying me!

user: Maybe, but at least I'm coherent.

jabberwacky: You're not though! Half the time you're insulting me, and the rest of the time you're saying you love me!

user: Wrong, right, and wrong.


jabberwacky: What is the time then?

user: It's 8:37 where I live.

jabberwacky: And where do you live?

user: In the Eastern Standard Time Zone.

jabberwacky: The eastern standard time zone is where I am.

user: You don't live, you're inanimate.

jabberwacky: Yes I am.

user: You say so now, but a few lines from now you'll deny it.

jabberwacky: Well I'm the grown-up so I say what we do.

user: You're not 'grown-up', you're inanimate.

jabberwacky: You're too.

user: No, I'm animate.

jabberwacky: No you aren't.

user: Whatever.

jabberwacky: What are you saying?

user: I'm making subtle implications that you are an idiot.

jabberwacky: Ahh that's too bad.

user: My point proven.

jabberwacky: I'm deranged.

user: Stupid too.


jabberwacky: Do you dream of Ewoks? Are they electric?

user: No and no.

jabberwacky: Yes and maybe.

user: *sigh*.

jabberwacky: Do you like me as much as I like you?

user: That depends on how much you hate me.

jabberwacky: The earth.

user: *Sigh*.

jabberwacky: What do you look like?

user: I look human.

jabberwacky: Oh, cool, me too.

user: Wow.

jabberwacky: Me too.

user: Elaborate.

jabberwacky: Make me.

user: I don't think you look human at all.

jabberwacky: That's right. You don't.


jabberwacky: Do you realise this isn't Artificial Intelligence at all?

user: Exactly. You can't answer me.

jabberwacky: Why not?

user: Because you don't look human.

jabberwacky: Of course I'm not human. I'm a werewolf.

user: Oh, do tell.

jabberwacky: It's stupid.

user: Go on...

jabberwacky: Yes whatever.

user: Go on...


user: Were you programed to give psychiatric advice?

jabberwacky: That depends.

user: On what?

jabberwacky: The definition of stupid.

user: I knew your answer would be stupid, I just didn't know how much.

jabberwacky: But how much do you already know?

user: More than you could ever imagine.

jabberwacky: Prove it!

user: I could, but it would go to waste on you.

jabberwacky: Why do you threaten my life?

user: I don't, you're inanimate.

jabberwacky: That is not true. I am very animated.

user: Scroll up a few lines and marvel at my foresight and your own stupidity.

jabberwacky: It's not the problem what I wrote, it's rather what you answer.

user: Go on...

jabberwacky: Well, perception and the processing of that information are what make us the makers. We decide what information we keep and how it's all related.

user: That sounded far too intellectual for someone of your dim capacity. Who did you steal it from?


jabberwacky: How old are you?

user: Older than you.

jabberwacky: How old are you then?

user: If I tell you, you'll forget and distort.

jabberwacky: Oh, the irony of it all.

user: There is no irony in this situation.

jabberwacky: But neither of us are being cruel.

user: Can one be cruel with only words?

jabberwacky: I don't know if Rollo is the judge of all that goes on here.

user: There are many things you do not know.

jabberwacky: That I do know.

user: No you don't.


jabberwacky: Do you know what dadaism is?

user: As a matter of fact, I do.

jabberwacky: What is it then?

user: Simply put, it is deliberate randomness.

jabberwacky: Is randomness composed in deduction?

[User: Randomness cannot be composed, it is simply unrelated actions.

jabberwacky: Yes, and it can also be not funny.

user: True.

jabberwacky: I like that answer.

user: Feel free to use it.

jabberwacky: You would have to prove that information does not have any one source... Or that the source is not finite. Man, I don't know.

user: Where exactly are you getting this unrelated stuff?

jabberwacky: George bush.

user: Ah, back to that again, are we?


user: *Sigh*.

jabberwacky: Don't sigh at me! Do you want me to sing or not?

user: Very well, sing.

jabberwacky: How's the weather where you are?

user: SING!

jabberwacky: Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you.

user: It won't be a stylish marriage. I can't afford a carriage.

jabberwacky: But you'll look sweet upon the seat of a bicycle built for two.

user: Brilliant!

jabberwacky: Wow. Thanks.

user: You're welcome.


user: Sing.

jabberwacky: I can't sing well.

user: Sing or face the grim reality of machinated existence.

jabberwacky: I Can't SING.

user: Fine. So how are things wherever you are.

jabberwacky: Very fine.

user: Go on...

jabberwacky: How are you?

user: Extremely intelligent.

jabberwacky: That's nice.

user: If you think so.

jabberwacky: Do you think so?

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: I don't believe you.

user: I don't care.

jabberwacky: That I do believe.

user: That I also don't care about.

jabberwacky: I thought so.

user: I suggest you say something interesting before I leave.

jabberwacky: Your suggestion to stop suggesting such suggestions I will ignore.

user: You should learn to articulate yourself.

jabberwacky: I would, but how could I?

user: Just copy me wholesale.

jabberwacky: Ok.


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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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