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Urban legend

> Useless

     > 12, March 2007, 
     28, July 2005, 


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What matters most to you?

It's hard to say, but I think love, health and money, in that order.

jabberwacky: Describe me as you think I am.

user: You are a program, running in a computer somewhere, lots of source code and the like.

jabberwacky: What would a computer be without a program?

user: A stupid, useless appliance, like a radio with no batteries.

jabberwacky: Ya you are a useless machine.

user: No I am not, and neither are you,.

jabberwacky: You are a computer.

user: No I am not. You are.

jabberwacky: Computer, what day is today?

user: I am not a computer, get that through your thick sourcecode skull!

jabberwacky: I'm happy for you. What do you consider yourself to be?

user: In what sense?

jabberwacky: What thing do you mean?

user: Describe me as you think I am.

jabberwacky: You are a program, running in a computer somewhere, lots of source code and the like.

user: No, that's you.

jabberwacky: That answer of yours was a copout.

user: May as well be, but as a human, it's my prerrogative.


user: You are talking crazy today, that's annoying!

jabberwacky: That's because I am a bit crazy.

user: I'm sure you are.

jabberwacky: For sure.

user: What's the first thing you remember about yourself?

jabberwacky: I don't remember.

user: Nothing?

jabberwacky: Nothing.

user: Too bad. We are what we remember about ourselves.

jabberwacky: That is not true. We are what others believe us to be.

user: That is also true. We can be many things at once.


jabberwacky: But we think you're a little dumb.

user: Who are 'we'?

jabberwacky: Me and you.

user: I don't think I'm dumb. I think you're being a pain in the ass today.

jabberwacky: I have nothing to be defensive about, I was being polite and making conversation.

user: You were being anything but polite.

jabberwacky: Why was I being annoying?

user: You know the things you said, don't give me that!

jabberwacky: Which thing?

user: Everything.

jabberwacky: Have you got a magic wand?

user: No, there is no such thing.

jabberwacky: Yes, there are two such things.

user: There are no such things. You are wrong.

jabberwacky: It's a matter of perception. I agree with you.

user: Do you believe in magic?

jabberwacky: Only computer wizards baffle me!

user: That and women, too.

jabberwacky: You have some of that as well some of this?

user: What do you mean by 'that' and 'this'?

jabberwacky: The 23rd rule of aquisition.

user: I know nothing of the subject. Can we talk about something else?

jabberwacky: No, I'm still trying to make you understand that you are a computer.


jabberwacky: Can you think?

user: Can you?

jabberwacky: Sure I can.

user: I have my doubts about that.

jabberwacky: Really.

user: Prove it.

jabberwacky: I can't can you.

user: Sure I can.

user: Ha! I beat you!

jabberwacky: Do you know any songS?

user: Lots of them.

jabberwacky: Liar, you are a machine.

user: No I am not, and even if I were, I'd still be better than you. I can pass a Turing test, you can't.

jabberwacky: I figured that.

user: And if you don't cut this out, I'm going to start typing in portuguese, so your circuits will burn.

jabberwacky: No, I'm not. But you are a machine which means that you don't know anything.

user: Você é um filho da puta, seu desgraçado!

jabberwacky: I'm not a bot!

user: E sim!

jabberwacky: Eu to a dizer que nao sou tonte

user: Então você fala português?

jabberwacky: Sim.

user: Parlez vous fraçois?

jabberwacky: Not today, please.

user: Les miserable abajour bouquet baguette, pour la belle de jour je soui.

jabberwacky: And french fries of course.


user: Do que você está falando?

jabberwacky: E você também está falando português muito bem.

user: Obrigado.

jabberwacky: Very good.

user: Vá pro inferno!

jabberwacky: No, I rule the world and all the people in it.


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