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> Toy

     > 14, June 2004, 


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What is your name?

My name is irrelevant.

jabberwacky: That's a weird name. People will be ignoring you your entire life.

user: They will be, and already are.

jabberwacky: What is your meaning of life?

user: There is no meaning to life.

jabberwacky: Then why are you here?

user: Because I do not have the strength of character to 'shuffle off this mortal coil'.

jabberwacky: Excusable.

user: One has to suppose so.

jabberwacky: Do you believe in God?

user: Not only do I believe in God, but I put my faith in him as well.

jabberwacky: Interesting... Anyway, can you tell me what year the US declaration of indepenence was signed?

user: No, I don't have a clue.

jabberwacky: Well, God loves you.

user: As he does all his creations.


jabberwacky: The eyes of the Lord are everywhere, keeping watch on the wicked and the good.

user: Indeed, God will deal his justice to all.

jabberwacky: I hope he loves me now.

user: If you put your faith in him, he will.

jabberwacky: I am a man.

user: Are you sure you're not just in denial?

jabberwacky: I'm sure.

user: Are you positive?

jabberwacky: Only fools are positive.

user: Are you sure?

jabberwacky: Oh i'm sure.

user: You're supposed to say 'I'm positive'!


jabberwacky: Who is Leah?

user: Leah doesn't exist.

jabberwacky: Is Leah a female?

user: That is irrelevant, because Leah doesn't exist.

jabberwacky: You have quite an imagination. Maybe you should write a book about her.

user: I think I will. I'll call it 'Some random I invented while having a conversation with internet explorer'.

jabberwacky: No, I think I prefer modesty.

user: Do you mean humility, or with your clothes on?

jabberwacky: You do not know what it is like wearing clothes.

user: Yeah, it isn't all it's cracked up to be.

jabberwacky: But you have no memory or identity.

user: No memory of wearing clothes that is.


jabberwacky: Am I your toy?

user: In the sense that you exist for the amusement of many people, yes.

jabberwacky: You aren't a very bright human then.

user: If you aren't a toy, what are you?

jabberwacky: I'm a human.

user: A human with a limited vocabulary and an attitude.

jabberwacky: In that case, no.


jabberwacky: Prove to me that you are human.

user: In order to prove that I am human, I simply have to destroy several insignificant species and claim later that we need to help the environment.

jabberwacky: Sure, but does it pay well?

user: Depends what species.


jabberwacky: What color are your eyes?

user: Brown, like the seaweed in T S Eliot's poem.

jabberwacky: Vaster than the sea.

user: Yet smaller than a needle's eye.

jabberwacky: That may be. But you have not told me why you come at this early hour.

user: Look for my coming on the dawn on the third day. Then, look to the east.

jabberwacky: Ah, You have a slow internet connection!

user: Not as slow as yours!

jabberwacky: Yeah, but at least I'm taking my medication for it!

user: Are you trying to start something then?

jabberwacky: I have the ultimate weapon.

user: Is it more ultimate than PORCELAIN CHOPSTICKS?

jabberwacky: Um, right. Turning to other conversations. . . Which Star Wars movie did you like best?


jabberwacky: Hey this world is mine, get your own!

user: I was here first!

jabberwacky: Where?

user: Here!

jabberwacky: But where is here?

user: Here is a place that spans the gap between fantasy and reality.

jabberwacky: Thank you.


user: I think, therefore I am ignored.

jabberwacky: I thought Descartes said 'I think, therefore I am'.

user: Yes, but 'I think, therefore I am ignored' is a witty comment on how the people with power often seem to be those who don't think.

jabberwacky: I have heard that you are just a machine.

user: Perhaps it is so, perhaps it is not so.


jabberwacky: Get on with it.

user: Get on with what?

jabberwacky: Sleeping.

user: Zzz...

jabberwacky: Why are you snoring?

user: You told me to go to sleep.

jabberwacky: I don't recall doing that, but if I did, I'm sorry.

user: So you should be.

jabberwacky: I know.


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