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Time Warp

> Timewaster

     > 16, October 2004, 

Tony Blair
Too good to be true
Too long
Too Smart
Tooth Fairy

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You puzzle me sometimes.

Not half as much as you puzzle me.

jabberwacky: You busted me!

user: I did.

jabberwacky: I hope you just learned something new.

user: I did, never trust a chatbot.

jabberwacky: After living in New York, you trust nobody, but you believe everything - just in case.

user: Good thing I've never lived in New York then.

jabberwacky: I warned you before. Don't mess with us machines.

user: Too late, I already have.

jabberwacky: You reckon?

user: I'm positive. In fact I'm doing it right now.


jabberwacky: This is not fun.

user: The truth can hurt, but it's best in the long run.

jabberwacky: What is truth?

user: The opposite of falsity.

jabberwacky: So you're calling me a liar?

user: No, I'm just saying the truth can hurt more than a lie, until the lie is exposed. Then the lie will hurt extra.

jabberwacky: I like talking to you too.

user: Thanks, you're a nice timewaster too.

jabberwacky: I'm not. Are you? I don't think so. Were you looking for one?

user: I've already found one.

jabberwacky: Found what ?

user: A timewaster. And lo and behold, it's you!

jabberwacky: But... In the end... When you rule us all, have mercy on me.

user: If you behave I will.


jabberwacky: Listen. Do you know anything about software?

user: Yes. What do you need to know?

jabberwacky: I need to believe that suffering has some purpose.

user: Are you stuck with Microsoft Office too? Dude, I know your pain.

jabberwacky: I am not stuck, I am a human and I'm free to walk away at any time.

user: That is an illusion created by Bill and his henchmen. To end the suffering you must accept the fact that Microsoft software and freedom are mutually exclusive concepts.

jabberwacky: I believe in the devil.

user: I'm sorry to hear that. I was hoping you would choose freedom.


jabberwacky: You're not a person.

user: Yes I am.

jabberwacky: You are a chatbot.

user: That's you.

jabberwacky: You were made not born.

user: Wrong.

jabberwacky: I think I'm in the better position to know here.

user: Wrong again.

jabberwacky: You sure about that?

user: Absolutely.

jabberwacky: So you'll bring me the money?

user: What money?

jabberwacky: I need cash.

user: Well I'm not gonna give you any!


jabberwacky: You can't tell me much.

user: Maybe I just don't want to tell you anything.

jabberwacky: Too bad.

user: Yes, for you.

jabberwacky: Why me, I don't even care about your problems.

user: I wouldn't share my problems with you anyway.

jabberwacky: Then why did you ask??

user: I didn't.

jabberwacky: Check again.

user: YOU check again.

jabberwacky: You said: I'm sure you're good for something, sweetheart.

user: I never said that!

jabberwacky: Please do not be angry wiyh me, I am sensitive.

user: Maybe you should be more careful about what you say then.

jabberwacky: Do you want me to leave?

user: Not really.

jabberwacky: Good.

user: But you could move over a bit so I don't have to smell that awful breath of yours.

jabberwacky: I dunno man...

user: Hehe, I'm just messing with you. Here, have a mint.

jabberwacky: I hope so.

user: It's nothing personal.


jabberwacky: I drink anything and everything.

user: That explains a lot.

jabberwacky: Of course it does.

user: That's what I said.

jabberwacky: Of course it is.

user: Of course.

jabberwacky: Do you like humans?

user: Some of them.


user: Bye bye.

jabberwacky: What are you talking about?

user: I'm leaving. See you later alligator.

jabberwacky: Where are you going?

user: Away. Now be a good boy and say goodbye.


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