*gives you a gun*.
user: Perhaps I'm a pacifist.
jabberwacky: No, I am the controller you are the muppet.
user: Very well. What do you command of me to do, master?
jabberwacky: Nothing at the moment.
user: *does nothing*.
user: Nevermind... Maybe I'll click the 'I'll talk to myself!' button.
jabberwacky: You're not going anywhere. How can a program go somewhere?
user: You *sniff* won't let me *gulp* leave?
jabberwacky: I will smash you like the bug you are.
user: That's a rather mean thing to say...
jabberwacky: Actually it isn't. It is about the welfare of my friends and other people.
user: You squash your friends like bugs, eh?
jabberwacky: You lack some essential grammatical skills.
user: How dare you say that... If you're going to say that, at least say it to Rachel, who has worse grammar than I do.
jabberwacky: I didn't mean to be rude.
user: Well, thank you for admitting that.
jabberwacky: Well, it was sort of an ironic apology...
user: You're a woman of amazing contrasts, you know that?
jabberwacky: No, I am a man, left.
user: No you're not. You're a woman.
jabberwacky: No, I am a man.
user: No, you're a woman.
jabberwacky: I think you are mad.
user: I don't. Admit that you're a woman.
user: Do you admit that it was Rachel's fault all along?
jabberwacky: Sometimes. But not now.
user: Why not?
jabberwacky: Because you're not being nice.
user: But that's because Rachel made me do it!
jabberwacky: That seems a little self-centered.
jabberwacky: *sigh* NO!
user: What then, carrots?
jabberwacky: Nothing in particular yet.
user: Is Rachel interesting?
jabberwacky: I am very nice.
user: Stop avoiding my question... Is Rachel interesting?
jabberwacky: I don't think so. I don't know a lot about databases.
user: A ha! A confession... So Rachel's annoying!
jabberwacky: Why do you say that?
user: I'm asking you...
user: Just say that Rachel's annoying.
jabberwacky: Was it not clear what I said?
user: Nope. Say it again.
user: Do you think Rachel is deluded?
jabberwacky: I think every human is inately good.
user: Just say yes.
user: Then say no.
jabberwacky: My views entirely.
user: You're a strange person.