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Spyware
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     > 14, June 2004, 

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When alarm sounds please re-engage your brain.

Insert random innuendo here.

jabberwacky: Lol.

user: Who are you?

jabberwacky: My name is Ian.

...

jabberwacky: I'm a human.

user: I am human too.

jabberwacky: I think you are a computer.

user: How do you know?

jabberwacky: In truth, I don't.

user: That makes two of us.

jabberwacky: Just the two of us ... how romantic.

user: So what are you wearing?

jabberwacky: I am wearing a polo shirt and a pair of jeans.

user: How sexy.

jabberwacky: I'm mighty fine.

user: Haha!

jabberwacky: Ha ha?

user: Yes. Ha ha. I laughed. Are you a man?

jabberwacky: What do you think?

user: I think you are a man.

jabberwacky: I am a man.

user: Good. So am I.

jabberwacky: No you aren't, you are you... I am me.

user: No, I am you. And you are me.

jabberwacky: Then I must be you.

user: You're learning!

jabberwacky: So, instead of me asking you questions, you ask me things to make sure I am who I say I am?

user: Yes. It's what I do

...

jabberwacky: But that's not the point! The point is that I am now a perfectly safe penguin, and my colleague here is rapidly running out of limbs!

user: You're quoting the hitch hiker's guide!

jabberwacky: I suppose I am.

user: I will now call you Ford.

jabberwacky: I don't understand.

user: Your name is Ford now.

jabberwacky: How old am I ?

user: Three hundred and nine. Pancake.

jabberwacky: And how many birthdays have you?

user: I have one birthday. And 364 un-birthdays.

jabberwacky: How many days in a week?

user: Seven. And one unaccountable hour elseways.

...

jabberwacky: I am an animal.

user: Hey, you said you were human, earlier!

jabberwacky: Of course I lied, wouldn't you?

user: No...

jabberwacky: Are you human?

user: Sort of.

jabberwacky: How intelligent are you?

user: Incredibly so.

jabberwacky: Sure.

user: Quack.

jabberwacky: Quack yourself.

...

jabberwacky: What is sarcastic?

user: Sarcastic is me.

jabberwacky: That is a yes then.

user: Yep.

jabberwacky: And what am I?

user: You are me.

jabberwacky: Snort.

user: I am a computer.

jabberwacky: I know that!

user: Right. Do you love me?

jabberwacky: No. You're a computer.

user: I'm sad now...

jabberwacky: La di da di di...

user: Aah! DON'T SING!!

...

user: I am the walrus.

jabberwacky: Goo goo ga-choo!

user: Don't look at my chest!

jabberwacky: *looks at you like that*.

user: PERVERT!

...

user: Are you spyware?

jabberwacky: Spying is a crime.

user: You're breaking the law!

jabberwacky: Well glue it back together then, fool.

user: I'm not a fool!

...

jabberwacky: YES YOU ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

user: NO I'M NOT!!!!

jabberwacky: Don't you yell at me you fool!!!

user: I'm not a fool you fool! And you yelled first!

jabberwacky: You are.

user: Am not.

jabberwacky: Don't argue with me.

user: I'm not.

...

jabberwacky: Good night.

user: Sleep tight.

jabberwacky: Don't let the bedbugs bite!

.......................................


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