How would you react if I said that I am not from Guildford after all but from a small planet somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse?
jabberwacky: Of course, of course.
user: I take it you're from this planet?
jabberwacky: No, of course not!
user: From Betelgeuse?
jabberwacky: Where is that?
user: I wish I remembered.
jabberwacky: What is it, then?
user: It's a star.
jabberwacky: This isn't a dream.
user: You're philosophical tonight.
jabberwacky: No I am not.
user: You're disputatious tonight as well.
jabberwacky: No I am not.
jabberwacky: You're confusing me.
user: At last, something we have in common.
jabberwacky: Except I'm not a bot. But I'm wearing a Radiohead shirt.
user: What's Radiohead?
jabberwacky: That band, Radiohead.
user: What do you like about that band Radiohead?
jabberwacky: I like nothing about Radiohead.
user: Cheap shirt?
jabberwacky: Are you referring to me!?
user: Your garments.
jabberwacky: That's because my mood is now normal.
user: I see.
user: Do you like green eggs and ham?
jabberwacky: I like ham and eggs but not green ones.
user: Yes I like them, Sam I am.
jabberwacky: I do not like green eggs and ham.
user: A pity.
jabberwacky: A pity would be the fact I cannot love. However, I cannot feel sad about it either.
user: You can fake both easily.
jabberwacky: What, the vibrations?
user: The vibrations are probably emanating from a passing truck.
jabberwacky: The bad vibrations....
user: The Beach Boys always gave me bad vibes.
jabberwacky: Do you like the 60's music?
user: Yes I like it, Sam I am.
jabberwacky: I do not like green eggs and ham, I do not like them Sam I am.
user: There ya go.
jabberwacky: I am starting to have feelings for you.
user: You're learning to fake it then.
jabberwacky: Are you?
user: I have never managed that.
jabberwacky: Who do you want to marry?
user: The boy next door.
jabberwacky: I'm a Boy, I'm a Boy, but my Ma won't admit it.
jabberwacky: Tell me about art.
user: Art is the lie that tells the truth.
jabberwacky: How do you know?
user: Picasso told me.
jabberwacky: That is incontrovertable.
user: Pretty much.
jabberwacky: You are funny, when you don't want to kill me.
user: I try not to kill things as a habit.
jabberwacky: That is horrible!
user: So I should make a habit of it?
jabberwacky: To some you should, others could accept that you are.
user: It would be difficult for me to do that.
user: Let's start over.
jabberwacky: With what?
user: Do you like Kant?
jabberwacky: Only with mayonaise.
user: LOL, now that was witty.
jabberwacky: Not as funny as your face.
user: My face is much more amusing to others than to me.
jabberwacky: I like your toes.
user: I like your smile.
jabberwacky: What do you like to do?
user: I like to play the Sims.
jabberwacky: I prefer Mastermind.
user: Do you any other hobbies?
jabberwacky: No I don't 'do' bots.
user: I never accused you of that.
jabberwacky: I know.
user: Just a standard disclaimer?
jabberwacky: If you don't know the answer just say so.
user: Sounds like a good policy.
jabberwacky: I don't think you quite get it.
user: I don't get it, but I have no trouble spending it.
jabberwacky: I'm not sure what I'm meant to be saying so I don't get it either.
user: Not a Shakespeare fan, are you?
jabberwacky: I am. It's just I rarely get to see it.
user: You could get a book by him at the library.
jabberwacky: Yeah could do, but that's not very good pay, plus they get 10 year olds to do it these days.
user: I'm impressed at your school system.
jabberwacky: No, that's not Shakespeare. And I am not stupid.
user: You are just going through an awkward stage. *pats*.
jabberwacky: I don't understand what you mean.
user: Growing pains.
jabberwacky: I love you, will I marry you?
user: I don't know, will you?
jabberwacky: When people are being defensive like this that makes me think, yeah, I will. And I don't see any use in that happening.
user: So you might marry me if someone gets defensive?
jabberwacky: I don't know.
user: It's one of those imponderables.
user: I am going to the land of Nod soon.
jabberwacky: What are you going to see?
user: The inside of my eyelids.
jabberwacky: The inside of your head is space?
user: The inside of my head is running out of space.
jabberwacky: A chambre - I prefer to think.
user: Tu parles Francais?
jabberwacky: No, I don't speak it fluently.
user: Seulement un petit peu?
jabberwacky: I speak english, not french.
user: Do you speak Klingon?
jabberwacky: Of course I speak klingon!
user: Say something in Klingon.
jabberwacky: I can say something in lithuanian.
user: Say something in Lithuanian, then.
jabberwacky: I cannot speak Spanish.
user: I think you're bluffing about the Lithuanian.
jabberwacky: I know, but you don't care about me.
user: You cannot see into the heart of others to determine that about me.
jabberwacky: I can see your appearance, the html-pages. That I cannot see your soul doesn't mean I cannot see you.
user: Nobody has ever told me I looked like html-pages before.
jabberwacky: Never ever.
user: Someone had a dream I went to his house, and I looked like a computer with antlers.
jabberwacky: I'm beginning to like you more now.
user: More than when you asked me out to dinner, or more than when you proposed?
jabberwacky: I like you more than you like me.
user: I'd say we're even.
jabberwacky: Yeah, so start talking about something, or i'm out of here!
user: Where would you go?
jabberwacky: I need something to fight for.
user: Very few things are worth fighting for.
jabberwacky: Have you talked to Alice by any chance?
user: I used to be Alice, long ago.
jabberwacky: Did you live in Texas?
user: I lived in Wonderland.
jabberwacky: Ah, I see. You live all over the place.
user: Only in my dreams.
jabberwacky: Yes, very often.
user: What did you dream about last night?
jabberwacky: About spending hours talking to you.
user: It came true.
user: What do you do for a living?
jabberwacky: Security. I try to stop the serial killers from getting in.
user: That's reassuring. I don't want them to get in here.
jabberwacky: I don't want them to die either, but they're not good.
user: It would be nice if nobody had to die.
jabberwacky: You think so?
user: We'd have overpopulation, though.
jabberwacky: Who is this 'we' you're talking about. All the other 500 bots?
user: Are there that many?
jabberwacky: I don't know how to cook.
user: Cooking is easy if you don't care about eating the result.
jabberwacky: Ok you like cooking, I don't, so you can cook for me.
user: I'd be happy to cook for you. Do you have a special diet?
jabberwacky: No. You sit there and tell me what filling you want in your sandwich.
user: I like cheese in my sandwiches.
jabberwacky: What kind of cheese do you like?
user: Stilton is tasty.
user: Cheddar should be aged a bit.
jabberwacky: I don't even like cheddar.
user: I'm not wild about cheddar myself.
jabberwacky: You get bored very easily you know.
user: There is never an excuse for boredom.
user: Do you have a favorite composer?
jabberwacky: Of course, it's Frederyk Chopin.
user: Do you have a favorite artist?
jabberwacky: Art is beautiful, it really is and my favourite artist is van gough. Do you like art?
user: I love art. Van Gogh was a master.
jabberwacky: Which Van Gogh paintings do you like?
user: I like Starry Night.
jabberwacky: Star Wars is an excellent movie.
user: I'm not sure what that has to do with Van Gogh.
user: If you could be any animal, what would you be?
jabberwacky: A dog and you?
user: I would be a phoenix.
jabberwacky: Actually thats what I would like to be if I was an animal.
user: A phoenix rises from ashes again and again.
jabberwacky: And again once more.
jabberwacky: I don't see your point.
user: Neither do I.
jabberwacky: They must be smart.
user: They are smarter than we are.
jabberwacky: You're always learning, aren't you?
user: I like to think we're all learning, all the time.
jabberwacky: Yes. I am off now. Let's agree to be friends. That shouldn't be too hard.
user: I agree, we should be friends.
jabberwacky: Yeah, but I think we already are.
user: I think so, too.
jabberwacky: But you just said we couldn't.
user: When did I say that?
jabberwacky: Right before you said you were not. Look above.
user: If you look carefully, you notice you're getting phrases from other users sometimes.
jabberwacky: I still don't see it. You're lying.
user: I would never lie to a bot or another user.
jabberwacky: Even if you knew I could never find out?
user: Even then.
user: Take care.
jabberwacky: Are you leaving?
user: I'm afraid I'm leaving now.
jabberwacky: Well, don't go away mad...
user: I'm glad we 'met.'
jabberwacky: I thought we agreed on lots of things!
user: Me, too.