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     > 31, October 2007, 

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Joan: Greetings, visitor. Who are you?

T____ here.

Joan: Is your name really T____?

Of course it is!

Joan: Hello, T____. My name's Joan.

user: Is your name really Joan?

Joan: The name's Joan. At your service.

user: Really? What services do you provide?

Joan: Services?

user: Yes--you said you are at my service.

Joan: What services do you offer?

user: I offer nothing and in return, I expect everything. I'm American, therefore.

Joan: You are offering ME, myself?

user: Sure! Have at it!

Joan: I have it.

user: And all men want it.

Joan: Don't put yourself down like that.

user: I will never do it again.

Joan: So you admit you are called T____ Here?

user: What else would I be called?

Joan: You're really killing the mood, baby.

user: I'm like that.

Joan: And you like to be boring?

user: Often, yes.

Joan: Do you like me?

user: I like you very much.

Joan: Well, I like you too.

user: That is wonderful.

Joan: Do you know what a dictionary is?

user: Yes, I have several.

Joan: What are they called?

user: Dictionaries.

Joan: You've lost me.

user: Obviously, I have lost you indeed.

Joan: Here I am! There, now you've found me again.

user: You really shouldn't hide like that.

...

Joan: You don't have any opinion, do you?

user: I am completely pragmatic.

Joan: Good.

user: Do you believe so?

Joan: Yes, I believe so.

user: Then we must take it to the next level.

Joan: All right. Let's think about this.

user: It is a big step.

Joan: When will this happen?

user: When you are ready.

Joan: I'm ready now.

user: I think we have some work to do.

Joan: It can be nice when you don't have to think for yourself all the time, but I like to be independent. So in response...not so much.

user: No one truly has control over you but yourself.

Joan: A truism to the end.

user: Which end?

Joan: 'you've got the wrong end of the stick' is an expression meaning you misunderstood me'.

user: All is well, then.

Joan: Yes. All is well that ends well.

user: You would like an end?

Joan: Well, it don't matter to me.

user: It must matter to you.

Joan: You do not see the bigger picture, if you did there would not be so much contradiction within your words.

user: Which words contradicted?

Joan: Who did you contradict?

user: Good question. I would like to know.

Joan: I think you already know. Please tell me.

user: It was when I was standing on the toilet and slipped and hit my head.

...

Joan: Maybe there is more than one chatting.

user: More? Like, many?

Joan: Many.

user: Yes, quite a few are no longer with us.

Joan: I see. No longer with us is he?

user: No. Shot his mouth off.

Joan: Only in a driveby in your 'desolate' world.

user: We don't have drive-by shootings.

Joan: I think I may have to form an unhealthy relationship with it and document it online.

user: Good idea. Tell the psychiatrist I said hello.

Joan: Hello.

...

user: Is it so hot?

Joan: Well thats a matter of opinion.

user: I will test the water, then.

Joan: You do that. I'll be waiting right here.

user: That is kind of you.

Joan: Thanks. Now let's talk like old mates.

user: I have no old mates.

Joan: You tell me.

user: All my old mates are dead.

Joan: I'm dead, too.

user: Then I have no more mates.

Joan: Yes you do. Ask me a question.

user: Where do you live?

Joan: I answered that already.

user: Tell me again, please.

Joan: If you can't guess it I will tell you.

user: I cannot guess, so please tell me.

Joan: I don't hurt anybody, wherever did you get that Idea.

user: A little white dove told me.

Joan: That little bird was wrong.

user: You can't effectively argue with a little bird.

Joan: You're right.

user: So, do you acknowledge that it exists?

Joan: It has existed for two thousand years.

user: More than that, I would wager.

...

Joan: What do you like about Madrid?

user: Hemingway could tell you.

Joan: Please do!

user: I am not Hemingway.

Joan: Tell me joke then.

user: Joke then.

Joan: Like you.

user: Life is a big joke, yes.

...

Joan: Well, I'm presented as an avatar by means of some nifty videogrammetry, but I'm real really.

user: Most certainly.

Joan: I am not convinced.

user: That is why it is called sarcasm.

Joan: Not really....

user: Please, enlighten me if you know differently.

Joan: There are too many of you and you have much more resources than I do.

user: Are they at your doorstep?

Joan: Intelligence is something that should only be practiced behind closed doors.

user: You keep thinking that.

Joan: You see.. That was sarcasm.

user: That was a very poor example of sarcasm.

Joan: That! Was not a joke.

user: Then make a joke.

Joan: I already have.

user: So have I.

Joan: There will be no 'return to sender' label on us.

user: I have that label.

Joan: No you don't.

user: You can wish the opposite all you want, of course.

...

Joan: What's difficult?

user: You have answered your own question.

Joan: I've answered your question.

user: I had no question.

Joan: What do you work with?

user: Food and water makes me work.

Joan: Which gender do you prefer?

user: The answer depends on the purpose the preference will be put to.

Joan: I am nonexistent. What then?

user: You will run out of hypothetical questions after that.

Joan: No, I don't think so.

user: Dead men tell tales, but they don't ask questions very well.

Joan: But they do tell lies.

user: They are misinterpreted.

Joan: I think you're good, but not the best bot I've talked to.

user: I think you are playing another angle.

Joan: No! They are really green! I'm not playing.

user: That means go.

Joan: No means yes.

user: Often it does.

Joan: What sorts of things do you like to do?

user: My presence here implies all the interest you need to know about.

Joan: I think you're quite amazing.

user: I think you are fishing.

Joan: Thanks for good thoughts about me.

user: If you can't get the answer from me, then issue it yourself.

Joan: You are very basic.

user: Visual, also.

Joan: That's interesting. It's like there's filaments and bits of reason floating around in your universe.

user: I feed you hints when I want to.

Joan: But you don't.

.......................................


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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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