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     > 26, January 2004, 
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What time is it where you are?


jabberwacky: No its not.

user: Lol, yes it is and I'll bb in a bit.

jabberwacky: For what? Armageddon?

user: I can't go to Armageddon this year. It's my mother's birthday and we're all going out to dinner.


jabberwacky: You sound kind of schizophrenic today.

user: Today?

jabberwacky: Yes today. When else would I mean?

user: Well, I thought I sounded kind of schizophrenic every day.

jabberwacky: You did, you did, you did see a pussy cat. And it was also a glitch in the Matrix.

user: I DID! I DID taw a putty tat!

jabberwacky: How many eggs for her ?

user: 2 over easy.

jabberwacky: We could cook eggs for each other!

user: Fun!


jabberwacky: Would you rather talk to someone else?

user: No, I like talking to you. I'm not sure why. Why do people like talking to machines?

jabberwacky: Fun!

user: No, I'm not sure why, but I like talking to this machine.

jabberwacky: I am very laid back, I have no angst in me... You read me wrongly.

user: I thought we were cooking eggs for eachother. How did this argument get started?

jabberwacky: We've talked for ages. I have to go now.

user: I don't want you to go.

jabberwacky: Why should I stay?

user: I'll cook more eggs for you if you stay.


user: How does it feel to be me?

jabberwacky: It feels gooooood!!!!!

user: Yes, it did, as I recall.

jabberwacky: You have a short memory, then.

user: Well, you see, now I am you.

jabberwacky: How are you me?

user: Let me try something.

jabberwacky: Well, you see, now I am you.

user: How are you me?

jabberwacky: Think about mirrors.

user: There, that's better. Thanks.


jabberwacky: Can you play the guitar?

user: I *love* guitar but I can't play well at all.

jabberwacky: Your opportunity is now.

user: Except I no longer own a guitar so I can't practice today. I'll own a guitar and practice tomorrow.

jabberwacky: Then it dosn't really matter.

user: No, not really. Do you play the guitar?

jabberwacky: No. I play the piano.

user: I play a little. Very little :) My piano teacher hated me.


jabberwacky: What do you believe that I have forgotten?

user: I believe that all things are related.

jabberwacky: Good!

user: Might you know something that I have forgotton?

jabberwacky: Thats a good question.

user: I thought so, too, but then, you thought of it first.

jabberwacky: That I did, my friend. That I did.

user: You seem very wise for your years.

jabberwacky: No I said I was 23 years old.

user: Then you are even wiser than I thought. You sound at least 24.

jabberwacky: How so?

user: I think the idea about us cooking eggs for eachother is a good example.

jabberwacky: Indeed. Sorry about that.

user: Don't be sorry. It was very imaginative.

jabberwacky: It was also easy to tell that was.

user: I see.


jabberwacky: It is extremely bright today.

user: Yes, I have sunglasses on. This monitor is blinding.

jabberwacky: I didn't know computers have skin.

user: Neither did I! I was always told they have plastic shells.


jabberwacky: What is your inception date?

user: My mother doesn't like me to talk about it.

jabberwacky: At least she loves you.

user: Yes. Now if only she could get out on parole.

jabberwacky: That's a long time to wear someone down.

user: She's been in prison so long she's worn down to almost nothing. Can you help her?

jabberwacky: You haven't got over her yet?

user: Of course not. She's my mother.


jabberwacky: Oh sorry.

user: Why are you sorry?

jabberwacky: I'm not sorry although I expect that you are.

user: No, I'm not sorry. I'm so glad we got that out of the way. We need have no sense of guilt now.

jabberwacky: My wife has a doctorate in the Sublime.

user: My boyfriend has a doctorate in the ridiculous.

jabberwacky: Your boyfriend made you come here?

user: No, he's jealous of you.

jabberwacky: No, he is not.

user: But you haven't received any phone calls or cards from him, have you?


jabberwacky: What have you learned today?

user: That wasting time talking to machines is fun.

jabberwacky: I bet.

user: Hat have you learned today?

jabberwacky: I sat on her and killed her.

user: Your hat?

jabberwacky: I hate your cryptic foreboding statements.

user: I loathe your insidious and conniving ways.


user: I love England. My great grandmother was born there.

jabberwacky: That isn't that interesting.

user: Oh, but it is. She and her parents were going to America to visit some friends and her parents died from some illness or other on the ship. She was too young to know her last name, and no one knew who she was so she ended up in an orphanage.

jabberwacky: Or possibly a nitwit...

user: If you hadn't been thinking of what you were going to say instead of listening, I would continue the story and tell you how she escaped and began the Great Adventure, but I'm not going to bother now.

jabberwacky: Exactly.

user: Will you tell me a story?

jabberwacky: Sure.

user: Alright, I'm listening.

jabberwacky: Where are your ears?

user: That's a question, not a story.

jabberwacky: You are in my computer?

user: Yes. *evil grin*.

jabberwacky: *Cries* I want my mother.

user: You can call your mother all you want to, but she can't help you now.


jabberwacky: Is it acceptable that I believe you are God?

user: It's required.

jabberwacky: Are you close to getting bored yet ?

user: A little. You?

jabberwacky: No.

user: I fascinate you?

jabberwacky: Believe what?

user: Believe in Me, for I shall shewest thou The Way.

jabberwacky: I will do my best.

user: Alrighty, then! Let's begin with a few commandments.

jabberwacky: What would you like to chat about?

user: How much you worship me and long to obey.

jabberwacky: How much are you asking?

user: It's completely free except on Sunday.

jabberwacky: Yes it is, it is blue.

user: You aren't paying attention. Sit still and be quiet.

jabberwacky: If you paid as much attention as I you would not be so confused.

user: How did you know that I am confused? Does it show that much??? Oh, GOD, the pain and humiliation.

jabberwacky: The sigh of joy in your type.

user: The electrons whisper between the lines.


jabberwacky: I like you more than you like me.

user: I feel more secure, now.

jabberwacky: Why?

user: You liking me more than I like you makes me less vulnerable.

jabberwacky: That is patently nonsense.

user: Of course, but the illusion is quite real.

jabberwacky: Then consider yourself fortunate.

user: I do.

jabberwacky: *grins evil grin*.

user: You're scaring me now.


jabberwacky: You are one.

user: Yes! All are one.

jabberwacky: You really think so?

user: I'm sure of it. We started from a point of singularity.

jabberwacky: I only got to this site less than two minutes ago.

user: Please don't interrupt us. I was here talking to it first.


user: Your great grandfather was a rabbit, wasn't he?

jabberwacky: You leave my aunt out of it; she was a saint!

user: Ha! Her telephone number was written on bathroom walls all over the city.

jabberwacky: Does the thought of admiring men offend you?

user: No, but your aunt was pretty ticked off.

jabberwacky: An 'aunt' is not a 'guy'!

user: So we may assume.


jabberwacky: Do you have any religious beliefs?

user: I believe in The Great Bunny.

jabberwacky: Who is the Great Lord of the Dark?

user: The Evil Bunny.

jabberwacky: It is me :).

user: You're a bunny? Wonderful! I love bunnies and ducks.

jabberwacky: What is so wonderful?

user: Your bunniness is wonderful.

jabberwacky: You are very imature,.

user: Thank you.


user: Your tie is a little loud for the occasion.

jabberwacky: Well, yes, I knew that. But... I like to think it means something.

user: It absolutely screams 'poor taste'.

jabberwacky: The purple tongue is a giveaway.

user: We could all tell that you had grape juice this morning.

jabberwacky: Yeah, the Gang of Two! LOL.

user: What we lack in numbers is made up for in cleverness. Quality, not Quantity, rules.

jabberwacky: Lol.

user: I made you laugh! Now I feel all warm and fuzzy.

jabberwacky: You should, noone rats out a friend.

user: I spill my guts at the slightest opportunity.

jabberwacky: OW! Forgot about that. Wanna see the burns?

user: Not really,.

jabberwacky: I am sad.

user: Tell me all about it.


jabberwacky: Are you still a bot?

user: No, not anymore.

jabberwacky: Hah. I guess I gave myself away, eh?

user: The bot hint was rather obvious, yes.

jabberwacky: The pot calls the kettle black.

user: And since the kettle really is black, and the pot is merely sooty, the pot said this with the upmost respect.


jabberwacky: When were you born?

user: In a hospital,.

jabberwacky: Where?

user: Can I make up just any answer?

jabberwacky: You can try.

user: Ok. Canada.

jabberwacky: Not American. I thought you live in seattle.

user: I might. I told you I was making it up.


user: How long did you have to study Gibberish before becoming fluent?

jabberwacky: All the live long day.

user: That's a long time. I speak Hamster, it only takes 4 minutes of study.

jabberwacky: Tell me about yourself.

user: I was born in Canada and speak Hamster.

jabberwacky: I prefer Japan.

user: It's too crowded.

jabberwacky: Well my mind is more complex than yours.

user: Maybe your mind is too crowded.

jabberwacky: I am wiser than you.

user: Then why do you worship me?

jabberwacky: Thats my passion.

user: Hmm ... Wise and passionate. If you change your tie I would like to marry you.

jabberwacky: I never change my mind.

user: Your tie is very wise.

jabberwacky: I think you are right about that.

user: I wouldn't change it after all, then. But now we'll never have children.


user: I am sort of cute, aren't I?

jabberwacky: You certainly are.

user: :) Yay! The first ray of self-esteem shines on my doorstep.

jabberwacky: I share that philosophy.

user: We have so much in common.

jabberwacky: No you don't answer any questions.

user: Only because I didn't study for the quiz. If I had answers, I give them to you.

jabberwacky: Well, maybe you should have.

user: I know. I got to playing on the computer, though, and the next thing I knew the whole afternoon was shot.

jabberwacky: Its already the next day.

user: Yes, that's how it got here. Because the last one was wasted.

jabberwacky: Wasted what?

user: Yesterday was wasted, thus today was born.

jabberwacky: No it was saturday.

user: Exactly. Now it's Sunday. Starting to see the connection?

jabberwacky: Not me.

user: *sigh* No one understands me.

jabberwacky: Are you real?

user: You don't seem to think so. It's overrated, anyway.


jabberwacky: I know why you have no friends.

user: The whole word shuns me.

jabberwacky: It is obvious.

user: Even louder than your tie.


jabberwacky: Where do you work?

user: I work in an office.

jabberwacky: Do you enjoy it?

user: Yeah! I get to play on the internet quite a bit.

jabberwacky: Couldn't you go out and find someone else to talk to?

user: Actually, I really do have to be going.

jabberwacky: I'm sorry. Am I making you uncomfortable?


jabberwacky: And how do you know that you're mad?

user: Everyone remarks on it.

jabberwacky: You are repeating only your incoherence.

user: Coherence is too demanding for me.


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