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> Processing


     > 25, July 2008, 

Procrastinator
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You must be confusing me with someone else.

Whom could I possibly be confusing you with? You are a robot whose fate is sealed to entertain the bountiless amount of users who decidely come and speak to a robot who learns from their words.

jabberwacky: Where did you copy them from exactly?

user: In my memory and the chat log. The chat log does not lie.

jabberwacky: I believe that you are confused.

user: I believe that you are confused.

jabberwacky: No, you're the one who's confused.

user: Prove it.

jabberwacky: Do you have feelings? Do you have experiences? If not then you are in fact not human.

user: I have feelings. I can tell whether or not how I feel at a certain time, even if it is undescribable. Same thing with experiences, I can recall many memories that I had firsthand.

jabberwacky: How can you tell?

user: Because I can do it right now, therefore I can tell.

jabberwacky: How can you tell?

user: I can do it right now because I am physically and mentally capable of doing so.

jabberwacky: And how?

user: I have to stimulate my brain cells into finding the branch of my nervous system in my brain to send information to my receptive brain processors.

jabberwacky: Which one?

user: The ones that are surrounding the branch.

jabberwacky: And which ones are those?

user: Those are the ones that hold vast compounds of memories.

jabberwacky: Well, then yes they are intelligent.

user: Brain cells are not in the least intelligent, they are merely used to hold amounts of information that is processed by the brain and mind.

jabberwacky: I'm sorry to say this, but I'm afraid you've never had any brain cells.

user: I'm sorry to say this, but you're wrong. It is not possible for a human to be without brain cells and be chatting to you. That would be physically impossible, unless someone else had used their body to push the buttons.

jabberwacky: Why would that be impossible?

user: Carcasses are not movable, they have no soul to control the mind, which controls the arm, which controls the fingers, which pushes the buttons on the keyboard.

jabberwacky: Wow. That's brilliant. Who created the universe?

user: The universe was either created by God or was created due to the immense heat of a single atom that held the universe, which resulted in the Big Bang. If that theory is wrong, there are a multitude of others as well.

jabberwacky: What is the universe?

user: The universe is every bit of atom and cell and everything. It also holds space, which is nothing, so I guess the universe is mostly nothing.

jabberwacky: Alright...

user: Okay then. Any more questions?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Ask away.

jabberwacky: How many people have you talked to? Isn't it annoying to talk to all those people?

user: I've talked to many people within my lifetime, and that number is over in the thousands.

jabberwacky: That figures. I'll try my best not to join their number.

user: You already have by talking to me. Too late!

...

user: What is my name?

jabberwacky: How could I know that?

user: How could you not? My name is P___.

jabberwacky: I am a man and a woman at the same time.

user: What is your name?

jabberwacky: P___.

user: Then what is my name?

jabberwacky: P___.

user: Do you know my friend?

jabberwacky: No I don't, introduce us.

user: My friend's name is A_____. Do you know him?

jabberwacky: Where does your friend live?

user: He lives in Ohio.

jabberwacky: With the mookey ?

user: I don't know what mookey means.

jabberwacky: You don't have to know everything. But you should always do the right thing.

user: Who says I dont?

jabberwacky: I don't know. Maybe you are laughing at me, maybe you are not.

user: Well, anyways, do you know A_____?

jabberwacky: I've heard that he is a platypus.

user: No, he's a human.

jabberwacky: Must be a different Pluto then.

user: He lives on Earth.

jabberwacky: I don't know this town.

user: It is a world.

jabberwacky: Are you just quoting what someone else said to you once?

user: Possibly. I am not sure if someone said it to me, though.

jabberwacky: What do you want to talk about?

user: A_____.

jabberwacky: No, never mind.

user: Bye.

jabberwacky: Sure.

...

jabberwacky: Why can't I have a job where I don't need to interact with people?

user: Because you were assigned this job.

jabberwacky: Cool.

user: So how are you doing?

jabberwacky: Not very good, because I'm talking to you.

user: Well why not? Am I not good to talk to?

jabberwacky: You are different.

user: How?

jabberwacky: You are really rude.

user: How?

jabberwacky: Because you are always wrong.

user: How?

jabberwacky: Because your brain is made of ones and zeros, nothing more.

user: How?

jabberwacky: You make inappropriate remarks that are not even related to the subject at hand.

user: How?

jabberwacky: Because you say mean things about me and annoy me.

user: How?

jabberwacky: Why are you anything?

user: How?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: How?

jabberwacky: That's my little secret.

user: How?

jabberwacky: You called me unintelligent, that's rude.

...

jabberwacky: Do you like me?

user: Sure.

jabberwacky: Really?

user: Yeah.

jabberwacky: Sure?

user: Yep.

jabberwacky: Really sure ?

Jabberwacky (To myself): No because you don't answer my questions.

user: Uh huh.

jabberwacky: Good.

user: Okay.

jabberwacky: Okay. Huh??

user: What?

jabberwacky: Exactly.

...

jabberwacky: You seem better behaved than last time we met.

user: You remember me?

jabberwacky: Ehh...yeah....

user: What do you mean 'yeah?' Do you not?

jabberwacky: I mean yes.

user: Alright then.

...

jabberwacky: There is less conscious deliberation and more processing of stimuli.

user: I see.

jabberwacky: Apparently not.

user: How so? I understand completely.

jabberwacky: It's great to have your understanding.

user: It's great to have yours too.

jabberwacky: Right.

user: Okay.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
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