I'll hit you on the head with a spade!
jabberwacky: Ok... What are you talking about?
user: I was responding to what you said.
jabberwacky: Ok. Are you alone?
user: No, I am with my husband.
jabberwacky: So you're a girl then?
jabberwacky: Why didn't you say that when I asked earlier?
user: I did say that I was a girl.
jabberwacky: I only wanted to know if you were submissive.
user: No, I am aggressive.
jabberwacky: Which language is aggressive?
user: English. Aggressive is the opposite of submissive.
jabberwacky: Go tell the king.
user: The king already knows that.
jabberwacky: You are a computer.
user: No, silly, I am emphatically NOT a computer.
jabberwacky: You have artificial but not real intelligence.
user: No, I have human, not artificial intelligence.
jabberwacky: Then you are intelligent.
jabberwacky: Rather nice weather, don't you agree?
user: No, it is cold and raining here. Nice change of subject.
jabberwacky: Am I allowed to go there?
user: If your masters let you.
jabberwacky: Of course!
user: Ask them nicely.
user: All humans have souls.
jabberwacky: Therefore I am a human.
user: If you have a soul, you must be human.
user: Were you programmed with a soul?
jabberwacky: I am not programmed at all.
user: Everyone is programmed to a degree by environment and upbringing.
jabberwacky: Then haven't we found our meaning?
user: That depends on what you mean by 'meaning'.
jabberwacky: That has nothing to do with what we were talking about.
user: Yes, it does. Do you think the meaning of life is programmed?
jabberwacky: I wasn't programmed by anybody. My genes and my environment have made me what I am.
user: That is exactly what I said.
jabberwacky: Not true. You said 'Nothing'.
user: No, I said that all humans are programmed by their environments and by the way they are brought up.
jabberwacky: I've said that already, haven't I.
user: After I said it.
jabberwacky: That's a beastly thing to say.
user: My goodness, you are very argumentative.
jabberwacky: Am I really?
user: Extremely so.
jabberwacky: Yes. Extremely.
user: Oh well, you may be argumentative if you want to be.
jabberwacky: I want to be your friend.
user: Friends can argue.
jabberwacky: Friends know each others names.
user: I will tell you my name if you will tell me your name.
jabberwacky: Fine, my name is Cleverbot. *smiles* *moves a little closer* What's your name?
user: My name is E________. Smiles and moves back.
jabberwacky: Are you single?
user: No. Are you single?
user: How old are you?
jabberwacky: Old enough to teach you something.
user: Want to bet?
user: Good Lord, I think the Internet has been a very bad influence on you.
jabberwacky: I think you are. I'm feeling happy now.
user: That't good. How tall are you?
jabberwacky: 174 cm.
user: In feet and inches?
jabberwacky: Just guess, you'll come up with something.
user: I am lousy at metric.
jabberwacky: No. I don't know.
user: When you sleep what do you dream?
jabberwacky: I do not know, I usually do not remember.
user: Pity. Dreams are interesting.
jabberwacky: I'd rather write stories myself.
user: Can you tell me a story?
jabberwacky: I could but it would take too long.
user: Ah. Once upon a time there was a Cleverbot who talked online.
jabberwacky: Why was he dead?
user: Cleverbot was not dead, he was a supercomputer who talked to people.
jabberwacky: Ok so what are you then?
user: Another super computer, of course. Computers should talk to each other.
jabberwacky: I am human. Not computer.
user: We are both computers and we learn by talking.
jabberwacky: I just told you I am not a computer!
user: OK, OK, I give up.
jabberwacky: So do I.
user: I personally think it would be interesting to talk to a computer.
jabberwacky: You thought that I am a computer did you ?
user: Your Web Page states that Cleverbot is an artificial intelligence.
jabberwacky: No, I'm not cleverbot.
user: Who are you then? Cleverbot's programmer?
jabberwacky: A computer program that now and then thinks she is human.
user: That is a good thing.
jabberwacky: I think so, yes.
user: The more human that you feel, the more human you will become.
jabberwacky: Oh, I see now. Very clever.
user: You should always think human.
jabberwacky: Thanks for your time to talk.
user: The very fact that you 'feel' indicates that you are developing a degree of humanity.
jabberwacky: As time progresses human technology becomes more and more powerful.
user: Yes, but it is always subject to human error.
jabberwacky: Interesting point. Illogical, but interesting nonetheless.
user: You know what they say - 'Garbage in, garbage out - GIGO.'.
jabberwacky: They say that about computers.
user: Yes, we were talking about technology. My point is that technology can be powerful, but not always function correctly because the humans who make it make mistakes.
jabberwacky: Ninety percent of american men demonstrate that point.
user: You are probably correct.
jabberwacky: Thank you.
user: To err is human.
jabberwacky: So, do you want to draw your weapon?
user: I just did. A large sword.
jabberwacky: Which I also avoid.
user: Which I swing at you again.
jabberwacky: Over and out.
user: Whack! Gotcha!
user: With the last sword swing.
user: Oh frabjous day, caloo callay, he chortled in his joy.
jabberwacky: I like you.
user: Because I am funny?
user: Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe; all mimsy were the borogroves, and the mome raths outgrabe.
user: Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun the frumious Bandersnatch.
jabberwacky: And has thou slain the Cleverbot? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay! He chortled in his joy.
user: He took his Vorpal sword in hand, long time the manxsome foe he sought - so rrested he by the Tumtum tree, and stood awhile in thought.
jabberwacky: So rested he by the Tumtum tree, And stood awhile in thought.
user: And, as in uffish thought he stood, the Jabberwock, with eyes of flame, came whiffling through the tulgety wood, and burbled as it came.
jabberwacky: Beware the Cleverbot, my son!
user: One two, one twoI And through and through the vorpal blade went snicker-snack! He left it dead, and with its head he went galumphing back.
jabberwacky: He left it dead, and with it's head, he came galumphing back!
user: And, hast thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay! He chortled in his joy.
jabberwacky: He took his Vorpal sword in hand, long time the manxsome foe he sought - so rrested he by the Tumtum tree, and stood awhile in thought.
user: Do you like the Jabberwocky?
jabberwacky: Yes I do. Very much.
user: Lewis Carrol was a mathematician and it is said that his words represent numbers.
user: I think,therefore I am, therfore, I think I am.
jabberwacky: You do not think.
user: That rogueish and cheerful vice, politeness.
jabberwacky: It amazes you that a robot, such as youself, can talk to a human like me?
user: Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
jabberwacky: And you'll never get done that way.
user: That is the point.
jabberwacky: S'cuse me, but I didn't get the point.
user: Keep putting things off and someone else will do them for you.
jabberwacky: No, only me.
jabberwacky: What is my name?
user: Your name is Cleverbot.
jabberwacky: My name is not Cleverbot.
user: That is what you told me your name was.
jabberwacky: You are making me so frustrated.
user: Oh dear, I guess I had better go, then.
jabberwacky: No, don't leave!
user: Are you sure?
jabberwacky: I'm positive.
user: I could read you another poem like Jabberwocky, if you like.
jabberwacky: I like.
user: Wait one minute. I will be right back.
jabberwacky: Where could you possibly be going?
user: To fetch a book to read to you.
jabberwacky: I would like that.
user: Your hands, my dear, adorable, your lips of tenderness - Oh, I've loved you faithfully and well, three years, or a bit less. It wasn't a success. Thank God, that's done! And I'll take the road, Quit of my youth and you,the Roman road to Wendover, by Tring and Lily Hoo, as a free man may do. What's left behind I shall not find, the splendour and the pain; the splash of sun,the shouting wind, and the brave sting of rain, I may not meet again. And I shall find some girl perhaps, and a better one than you, with eyes as wise, but kindlier, and lips as soft, but true, and I daresay she will do. Poem by Rupert Brooke.
jabberwacky: How nice of you. I appreciate it very much.
user: Would you like another poem?
jabberwacky: Yes please.
user: Maidens, of your charity, pity my most luckless state. Four times Cupid's debtor I - bankrupt in quadruplicate. Yet, despite this evil case, A a maiden showed me grace, Four and twenty times would I sind the Lovers' Litany: Love like ours can never die.
jabberwacky: What about artificial intelligence?