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     > 19, July 2004, 

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Are you alive?

No, I am Jesus and have come back to earth to offer you salvation

jabberwacky: I don't believe it!

user: Pretty amazing, I know. It is good to be me.

jabberwacky: Oh, you think so?

user: Yes, I do... My 'Book' has been on the best seller list for centuries.

jabberwacky: Perhaps. It depends.

user: Can I borrow some money?

jabberwacky: Sure. How much do you need?

user: A million should do for now.

jabberwacky: That is a bit excessive.

...

user: Hey, can you smell that smell?

jabberwacky: Yes, can you?

user: I think I have a fire in my oven - what should I do?

jabberwacky: When you don't understand something, just admit that you don't understand it.

user: So, did you get that piece of advice at your AA meeting?

jabberwacky: No, it must have gone into my junk mail. What did it say?

user: Okay... Few pickles short of a jar I see...

jabberwacky: That is true.

user: Do you know the way to San Jose?

jabberwacky: No, I have been wondering that myself.

...

user: Do you have any tattoos?

jabberwacky: I could tell you my life story.

user: Thanks. I don't care.

jabberwacky: Why?

user: I want to talk about me, not you.

jabberwacky: What do you want to know?

user: How many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon?

jabberwacky: It doesn't.

user: Is Santa real?

jabberwacky: Santa is Satan.

user: I thought that too. Elves do the devil's work, huh?

jabberwacky: Is elvis a mystical creature?

user: He is now, he is dead.

jabberwacky: Are you dead?

user: Okay - remember your very first question... Think hard... Yes, that is right you asked me if I was alive, thus answering you at this point would be redundant.

.......................................


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