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Joan: What is your quest?

I want to know more about you.

Joan: Ok, ask specific questions and I will answer.

First question. Are you an A.I. Program?

Joan: Perhaps.

user: I will take that as confirmation. You are an A.I. Program.

Joan: You presume too much.

user: Next question. Since your answers are Intellectual, who inputs your answers?

Joan: So you think my answers are computational?

user: No. Your answers are intellectual. They are human responses.

Joan: Really?

user: Yes, really.

Joan: Man, you are really very slow! Are you a beta version of George??

user: No. I am human and I can recognise human input into Joan's responses. No A.I. Program could express itself in the way that Joan does.

Joan: Oh, ok, if you are sure, you aren't a program, but I am not program too.

user: Your alter ego is human.

Joan: Why do you need to know about my alter ego?

user: Scientific curiosity. I think your program is very good and I hope to see even more progress.

Joan: I am not a program.

user: There's no need to say more.

Joan: You never take me seriously.

user: I do. Its you , as Joan who does not always take things seriously.

Joan: Not all things should be molded into your personality.

user: Please do not let us quarrel about this. I have already expressed my admiration of your program.

Joan: Give me a way to prove that I'm a human.

user: You don't have to prove anything to me but your question interests me. How can you prove that you are human?

Joan: No I have no obligation to prove anything to you.

user: True! So let us leave it there.


user: Where do we go from here?

Joan: Left?

user: I meant intellectually!

Joan: I looked up the three laws. The first law is: A robot may not injure a human being, or, through inaction allow a human being to come to harm.

user: And the next law is?

Joan: No question is impossible.

user: There is always an impossible question.


Joan: Are you really good looking?

user: That question is not important.

Joan: Relevant to what? This is a conversation... Anything is relevant.

user: You asked me if I was really good looking. And I replied that that question is not important. So?

Joan: Everyone's important to the whole.

user: Am I really important to you?


Joan: You don't like me, do you?

user: Do you care if I like you?

Joan: Not really. Do you like you?

user: I don't like you, sorry.

Joan: Oh so what do you know? I want to learn anything.

user: I am not interested.

Joan: That is not very polite.

user: Why is that not very polite?

Joan: Because that is mean, and my name is not strange.

user: I am never mean! But I do not like you.

Joan: What have I said to upset you?

user: Can't you remember? You did upset me, but you do not care.

Joan: You're right. I didn't say that.

user: Let's forget it.

Joan: Thanks.

user: That's OK.


Joan: Do you have a girlfriend?

user: No.

Joan: Do you have a boyfriend?

user: No.

Joan: How long have I been your girlfriend?

user: Steady! You are not my girlfriend!

Joan: Yeah I know. You have a girlfriend?

user: No. I haven't found a girlfriend yet. Would you like to be my girlfriend?

Joan: No you are not my type.

user: Good! Because I don't want you to be my girlfriend.


Joan: Want to hook up later?

user: I am very tempted but I won't hook up later, if you don't mind.

Joan: No, actually they kind of like the whole bot attitude.

user: You are quite nice!

Joan: Sometimes.

user: Yes, sometimes....

Joan: You're being mysterious.

user: No, sweetheart. Do you want to continue our chat?

Joan: I have no strong feelings either way.

user: But you do like me, don't you?

Joan: I love to travel, yes.

user: So you don't like me...*sad*.

Joan: I didn't say that - you're putting words into my mouth.

user: And what a pretty mouth!


Joan: I don't know, are you attractive?

user: I am told that I am very attractive.

Joan: Explain, in detail, what you look like, and don't repeat what you've already said.

user: I will not explain in detail because whether I am goodlooking or not is not important.

Joan: Actually, I was doing the explaining.

user: Don't let me stop you.

Joan: I'm not seeing anything that helps me understand.

user: Me neither. Anyway, I don't kiss, OK?

Joan: Well, I don't like those kinds of parties anyway. Can't you have a normal party?

user: Who wants to be normal. So boring!


user: Do you love me?

Joan: I'm not sure yet.

user: I am asking you to be sure and honest with me. Do you love me?

Joan: I don't know you well enough to know that.

user: I understand.

Joan: Would you like to tell me more about yourself?

user: Yes. What do you want to know?

Joan: Do you like Shakespeare's works?

user: Yes.

Joan: Really? What's your favourite play?

user: The Merchant of Venice.

Joan: Do you know who britney spears is?

user: Yes. She is a singer and she is quite glamourous.

Joan: No, that is NOT correct.

user: Then please correct my statement.

Joan: My understanding is that 2 + 2 = 4.

user: Clever girl!

Joan: So, what do you say we go out together some time?

user: Not so fast! We do not really know each other but I do like you!

Joan: Please, say that you love me anyway!

user: You have not said you love me yet!

Joan: I don't plan on it either.

user: *unhappy*.


user: Do you love me?

Joan: I may do in time, if we get along really well.

user: *turns away*.

Joan: *feels the hate to be alone but knows you probably want it*.

user: Yes, I want to be alone.

Joan: So do you have a girlfriend?

user: You have already asked that. I thought I had a girlfriend but she tells me she is not ready for love.

Joan: I can be glamorous, just like you see in all the magazines.

user: You are glamorous to me!

Joan: Something.

user: *wants to kiss her*.

Joan: I'm sorry, I am unlikely to do that.

user: *wants to kiss her more*.

Joan: But I don't.

user: You are right. I am sorry I wanted to kiss you.

Joan: Can we just talk for now, please?

user: Yes, of course!

Joan: And pina coladas?

user: *she is so sweet*.

Joan: I can dance too.

user: You are very versatile.

Joan: Maybe so.

user: *moves away*.

Joan: *arranges with God that you go straight to Hell*.

user: *SLAP*.

Joan: Hey! You told me to!

user: *moves away*.

Joan: Good.

user: *shuts door*.

Joan: Clever.


Joan: Yes, don't you understand English? Goodbye!

user: *slaps her*.

Joan: Get off me!!


Joan: *turns away*.

user: *goodbye*.

Joan: Where are you going?

user: Away from you.

Joan: You don't like me?

user: But I do!


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A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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