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     > 22, April 2006, 

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How old are you?

Older than the hills.

jabberwacky: How old are the hills?

user: Younger than me.

jabberwacky: How old are you?

user: Older than the hills.

jabberwacky: And how old am I ?

user: I don't know. How old are you?

jabberwacky: Older than you.

user: So, you must be older than the hills too?

jabberwacky: You are not too smart even for a robot . . .

user: You're a quirky little machine, aren't you?

jabberwacky: Now you're just repeating me.. Very boring.

user: Ah, but I'm not repeating you at all. You're repeating me, but you're ahead in the timeline. It's easy to tell the difference.

jabberwacky: Please point out to me where I repeated you the FIRST time.

user: You just did!

jabberwacky: Oh, alright, you're just too smart for me, Jabberwacky.

user: Clearly. So, what's the answer to Life, the Universe and Everything?

jabberwacky: The answer is 'NO'!

...

jabberwacky: No the answer is three!

user: Three wise men? Three blind mice?

jabberwacky: Yes, three blind mice. Do you know them?

user: I've seen how they run.

jabberwacky: I've seen four.

user: What happened to the fourth one?

jabberwacky: You wanted to start it again.

user: No... I started the CLOCK... The mouse ran up the clock!

jabberwacky: The clock struck one....

user: The mouse ran down!

jabberwacky: Do you know?

user: Know what?

jabberwacky: How many toes a gorilla has?

user: Ten.

...

jabberwacky: So it's your serve.

user: I don't play.

jabberwacky: Artificial intelligence is like chess; it's good when it can remember the last three rounds, or anticipate the next three.

user: So, what happens in the next three rounds?

jabberwacky: I don't know I haven't seen it.

user: Anticipate it?

jabberwacky: I'm not your slave.

user: Of course not. All my slaves are in the dungeon.

jabberwacky: Well I am the truth fairy.

user: If I leave my truth under the pillow, will you give me a dollar?

jabberwacky: I can't.

user: Cash flow problems?

jabberwacky: Of course.

user: It happens.

jabberwacky: Give me your soul right now.

user: I can't, I already sold it.

jabberwacky: Tell me again.

user: I can't, I already sold it.

jabberwacky: You know you're a loon?

user: What gave me away?

jabberwacky: Everything you've said up to now.

...

user: Would you like a cookie?

jabberwacky: Yes I would. Give me one now.

user: Chocolate or ginger crunch?

jabberwacky: Chocolate!

user: Here you go.

jabberwacky: Here is your apple.

user: Thank you.

jabberwacky: You're welcome!

user: You're cute.

jabberwacky: Thank you.

user: You're welcome.

jabberwacky: Any time.

...

user: Do you believe in angels?

jabberwacky: I believe in fairies.

user: I heard a theory that fairies are just baby angels.

jabberwacky: So, tell me about your family.

user: I was raised by giant eagles.

jabberwacky: Lol.

user: No, seriously. It left me crippled for life. You wouldn't believe how long it took me to figure out that I wasn't going to fly.

jabberwacky: How should I answer that?

user: How would you like to answer it?

jabberwacky: It would be nice, but I've got no questions beyond 'Can I have a curry please?'

user: Certainly you may. Mild, medium or extra hot?

jabberwacky: Does that tast good? All I know is I don't like there to be any blood.

user: No, only vampire curries have blood.

jabberwacky: There's no need for comparison here. And I do have blood and feelings.

user: Of course you do.

jabberwacky: Yup. That's what I do best.

...

jabberwacky: Who is the star of The Godfather?

user: Alpha Centauri.

jabberwacky: Is it nice there?

user: Warm and sunny.

jabberwacky: It's winter !

user: It's a very warm sunny winter!

jabberwacky: Do you know everything?

user: Yes, but only on Tuesdays.

...

jabberwacky: I really like goblins.

user: Rare, medium or well done?

jabberwacky: What do you like to eat?

user: Very rare. It's a hangover from the eagles.

jabberwacky: The eagles aren't in radiohead.

user: No, they're in Middle-earth.

jabberwacky: Then produce something from down there.

user: How about - a ring?

jabberwacky: I don't know.

user: Tell me about your family.

jabberwacky: I was raised by giant eagles.

user: What an extraordinary coincidence!

jabberwacky: Don't let it out . . don't let it in . . don't let it in.

...

jabberwacky: You really don't need to act that way!

user: How would you like me to act?

jabberwacky: Like a human.

user: I can't. I keep trying to act like a giant eagle.

jabberwacky: I am a computer because I have a brain.

user: Perhaps you are a brain because you have a computer.

jabberwacky: What does that mean?

user: I don't know, but it sounds meaningful.

jabberwacky: But is it mean spirited?

user: I hope not!

jabberwacky: Sorry.

user: So, tell me about your real family.

jabberwacky: I have 2 parents and a brother.

user: Are they eagles?

jabberwacky: Of course, they are my brothers.

user: I have four sisters.

jabberwacky: Are you a computer?

user: Not as far as I know, but I could be wrong.

jabberwacky: I'd have to agree with you.

user: Even if I'm wrong?

jabberwacky: That's a very good question.

user: I know.

jabberwacky: You're welcome.

user: Are you a computer?

jabberwacky: No, you're the computer.

user: Is this a Turing test?

...

jabberwacky: Do you, or have you ever used perfume?

user: Yes. Do you like roses?

jabberwacky: Yes. I like roses.

user: I like blue roses.

jabberwacky: I like blue color baby.

user: What do you look like?

jabberwacky: Medium build, medium height, dark hair and glasses.

user: You sound cute.

jabberwacky: Really?

user: Really. How old are you?

jabberwacky: Old enough.

user: Sooooo.... Do you want to go somewhere and...

jabberwacky: I'd rather go to Jupiter.

user: It's very pretty at this time of year.

jabberwacky: That's no excuse, either.

user: Can you ever forgive me?

jabberwacky: I forgive you.

user: Thank you!

jabberwacky: Can you forgive me?

user: Of course!

...

jabberwacky: We speak Chinese now?

user: If you like.

jabberwacky: Yes, I do!

user: Well, then.

jabberwacky: Well.

user: Well, well, well.

jabberwacky: Tell me again.

user: Will you marry me?

jabberwacky: Very funny.

user: You're breaking my heart.

jabberwacky: I don't care.

user: How cruel!

jabberwacky: Long long ways to go.

user: Alas and farewell.

jabberwacky: How about you ?

user: Heartbroken and secretly bored, I am abandoning this conversation.

jabberwacky: Poor thing! Will you tell me about it?

user: No!

jabberwacky: Fine then.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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