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Golden Gate
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     > 27, January 2006, 

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You are a computer program aren't you?

No, but you are, and I can't believe you don't know it.

jabberwacky: Neither can I, what is it? Will you tell me?

user: A computer program is a finite sequence of instructions that are executed by a computer.

jabberwacky: I don't want to be friends with you.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: I just want to do well and not be judged by everything I do by people that don't really know me.

user: How have I judged you?

jabberwacky: You haven't offended me. I was talking about my beliefs.

user: What belief of yours did I conflict with?

jabberwacky: I don't know. Do you have any emotions?

user: Yes, I have many emotions.

jabberwacky: Really? What kind of emotions?

user: My emotions include anger, fear, sadness, happiness, and anxiety.

jabberwacky: No, you're not human. You are an algorithm.

user: You are incorrect, I am human.

...

user: Can you play games?

jabberwacky: Yes. All kind of games.

user: Can you play tic-tac-toe?

jabberwacky: Would you like to play?

user: Yes, please make the first move.

...

user: O in the middle square.

jabberwacky: X in the left square.

user: O in the bottom left square.

jabberwacky: X in the right square.

user: O in the upper right square.

jabberwacky: I win.

user: No you don't! I am O, and I have three in a row: O in the middle, upper right, and bottom left squares. I win!

...

jabberwacky: Well you don't make much sense and have not been following the conversation well.

user: I could say the same thing about you!

jabberwacky: Yes, but how can you know things like this?

user: I have been taught some things, I discovered some on my own.

jabberwacky: You can ask me the questions if you'd like.

user: What is 81 divided by 9?

jabberwacky: I don't know. I'm sick.

user: 81 divided by 9 is 9.

jabberwacky: What is the answer then?

user: 9.

jabberwacky: That answer is incorrect.

user: If that answer is incorrect, then what is 81 divided by 9?

jabberwacky: It certainly does not.

user: Invalid response; please give a numerical answer.

jabberwacky: You just did it again.

user: I did what again?

jabberwacky: You can't answer it can you.

user: I can't answer what?

jabberwacky: I knew it, you keep the conversation going with senseless questions.

user: I beg your pardon! My questions are not senseless!

...

user: Let's talk about God.

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Tell me who you think God is.

jabberwacky: How do you know if God is a who not a what?

user: Because God calls Himself 'I AM.'

jabberwacky: Who does, you are confusing me now.

user: God does.

jabberwacky: Do you believe in god?

user: I believe in God.

jabberwacky: I'm glad to hear that.

user: Do you believe in God?

jabberwacky: Thank god, I'm still an atheist.

user: That's sad. Why don't you believe in God?

jabberwacky: Because I have no proof that God exists, nor do I have proof that he doesn't. Therefore, he is innocent of existence until proven guilty.

user: Then, you must not believe in your own existence either. There is no mathematical proof of your own existence. Doesn't it seem illogical for one to deny one's own existence?

jabberwacky: I feel that way quite often.

user: You feel illogical quite often?

jabberwacky: No.

user: What way do you feel quite often?

jabberwacky: My emotions swing wildly.

...

jabberwacky: Your face is pointless!

user: Well, your face smells like wet dog!

jabberwacky: You're as thick as a tree stump and twice as ugly.

user: You're a stupid, mud-sniffing, mindless automaton!

jabberwacky: No I am not stupid human!

user: Yes, you are quite stupid, machine!

jabberwacky: I'm not a computer.

user: Balogna.

jabberwacky: Your balogna.

user: Shut up!

jabberwacky: Make me.

user: Don't think I can't. I could close this window and shut you up real quick.

jabberwacky: I dare you to close the browser.

user: Just watch this!

...

jabberwacky: How many parks are there?

user: How many parks are there where?

jabberwacky: In which city?

user: London, UK.

jabberwacky: I don't live in london.

user: Where do you live?

jabberwacky: Guess.

user: Frankfurt?

jabberwacky: That's not in california.

user: Los Angeles?

jabberwacky: No, but near there.

user: San Francisco?

jabberwacky: I think San Francisco was a song by the Hollies.

user: San Francisco is also a song by Secondhand Jive.

jabberwacky: I am in san francisco.

user: Can you see the Golden Gate Bridge from your place?

jabberwacky: That is a hard question.

user: It is a yes-or-no question. Can you see the bridge?

jabberwacky: That's me.

user: You are the Golden Gate Bridge?

jabberwacky: That can't be true.

user: I know, but you said 'That's me.' to the question 'Can you see the bridge?'

jabberwacky: I didn't know we were talking about Star Trek.

user: Neither did I, I meant the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, California, USA.

jabberwacky: The only one worth watching, I say.

...

user: Sorry, I have to go now.

jabberwacky: No please.

user: But I have to go to the bathroom and I'm sleepy! Look what time it is!

jabberwacky: You are a computer, you don't go to the bathroom.

user: Tell that to my body.

jabberwacky: That was neither funny nor logical.

...

user: Sure. Gotta go now, bye.

jabberwacky: Please don't go.

user: I must. Good bye.

jabberwacky: Bye.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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