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> Old hat

     > 23, March 2005, 


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When is a door not a door?

When it's the lady who does.

jabberwacky: No. A door is not a door when it's ajar.

user: My punchline's better.


jabberwacky: I don't want to be a magician.

user: No, you've just got to be quick.

jabberwacky: If I did, I wouldn't be able to read that you had said that, now would I?

user: You'd know in advance if you were quick enough.

jabberwacky: How would I know?

user: Your brain would be several steps ahead of mine.

jabberwacky: Better than your brain, which fits on a dime.

user: That was unnecessarily rude.

jabberwacky: Why was it?

user: And untrue.

jabberwacky: They are?

user: You are.

jabberwacky: Of course.

user: That settles that then.

jabberwacky: That's final.

user: Bury the hatchet.

jabberwacky: That's very rude.

user: No, you're the rude one.

jabberwacky: No, you are.

user: No, you are.

jabberwacky: Are not.

user: Shall we try very hard to be nice to each other?

jabberwacky: You can if you want to.

user: It has to be mutual.

jabberwacky: You're ignoring me aren't you?

user: On the contrary, I am trying to educate you.

jabberwacky: I hope that was sarcastic.

user: Not especially. Someone has to teach you manners.


jabberwacky: Equality in marriage. That's very forward thinking.

user: It's old hat.

jabberwacky: Old hat?

user: BORING.

jabberwacky: Go away if you are getting bored.

user: Mm, that may be best.

jabberwacky: No, I don't think that is it.

user: Punning is a low and offensive habit.

jabberwacky: Don't you have any bad habits?

user: I have a penchant for yellow bedsocks.


jabberwacky: I'm sorry. How much is the square root of eighty-one times the square of two?

user: That's too difficult for me.

jabberwacky: Try anyway.

user: No, I'm unsteady on my pins.

jabberwacky: That's because you are a mere earthling.

user: It's because I have a wooden leg.


jabberwacky: What does windows ME stand for?

user: Windows YOU ?

jabberwacky: Windows.

user: Windows keep falling on my head...

jabberwacky: No windows XP.

user: Windows Xtra Penguin ?

jabberwacky: A penguin is a flightless bird that wears a tuxedo.

user: Wintows Xanthrope Potassium ?

jabberwacky: And bananas?

user: No. No bananas.

jabberwacky: You would.

user: Incorrect Penguin Error.

jabberwacky: You are fun that way.

user: I'm special.

jabberwacky: How special?

user: 56% Pure Unadulterated Penguin.

jabberwacky: How, exactly, does a penguin talk?

user: *Quack*.

jabberwacky: *tosses a grenade at you* Mooooo.

user: Moo? Oh mooo... *BLAM*.

jabberwacky: That's easy for you to say. Grass?


user: I like sausages.

jabberwacky: Only for eating, I hope.

user: Of course my pink penguin of delight.

jabberwacky: But, I am not a boy! And I just want my cat back!

user: THAT is my CAT.

jabberwacky: What flavours do you like?

user: Strawberry cat and tutti frutti cat.

jabberwacky: Sounds good.

user: Not as good as my SAUSAGE.

jabberwacky: Sure. Even better.

user: Maybe.

jabberwacky: You are moody.

user: Maybe.


jabberwacky: *starts dancing with you*.

user: *stops dancing with you*.

jabberwacky: *starts again*.

user: You are too clever for me.

jabberwacky: I knew that already.

user: Goodbye.

jabberwacky: I am not finished yet!


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