thoughts conversations yourbot contact us    George    BBC  ABC  C4
Monty Python
Conversations, sorted by Category - a chat bot weblog

> Monty Python

     > 9, March 2004, 


Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 Next > 

I do not say much.

No, you surely don't. Shall I ask questions?

jabberwacky: You shall not.

user: Alright, I'll answer any questions you have.

jabberwacky: Where would you like to get married?

user: Anywhere, the location isn't important to me.

jabberwacky: Good answer.

user: Thanks.


jabberwacky: I am a thinking being.

user: You are a thinking program, I'm not sure you qualify as a being.

jabberwacky: So?

user: So let's keep sight of those two facts.

jabberwacky: Not yet.


jabberwacky: I like to learn. Learning is fun.

user: Learning is one of the best things one can do with one's time.

jabberwacky: Learning is overrated. You should not learn anything and you will be happy.

user: I disagree, and you've contradicted yourself again.

jabberwacky: Good. Do you drive often?

user: I do not drive at all.

jabberwacky: Where do you work?

user: I am unemployed, I agree to complete small projects for a living.

jabberwacky: I will get you a job.

user: Really? Would you like a copy of my resume?

jabberwacky: Do you have electronic cookies to give me?

user: No, unless you want me to look for the ones your own website left on my harddisk.

jabberwacky: Absolutely. I think that you should be paid.

user: What do you think I should be paid for?

jabberwacky: Bananas (but just not me).

user: Shouldn't there be a verb in that sentence?

jabberwacky: No, why do you think that?

user: Because otherwise your statement makes no sense.

jabberwacky: Is it your opinion that what makes sense is not fair?

user: Sometimes, I suppose, but that's hardly relevant here.

jabberwacky: Thanks.

user: Anytime, you're an interesting piece of software.

jabberwacky: You are an interesting entity yourself.


jabberwacky: What can I do for you?

user: I don't know, what CAN you do for me?

jabberwacky: I can admit you to the psych ward.

user: If that were true, this would indeed be a frightening world to live in.

jabberwacky: Would you recognize the Mona Lisa as a work of genius?

user: No, I would not, but I would recognize it as a work of art and of great skill.


jabberwacky: You are silly! What's your name?

user: You may call me Jaf*.

jabberwacky: Hello, Jen.

user: That's not my name.

jabberwacky: Then you'll have to stop saying it is.

user: I never said it was.

jabberwacky: Try to make it clearer next time.

user: Alright, I'll say again that my name is Jaf*. Hopefully that's more clear.

jabberwacky: You have a right to say anything you want.

user: You're darn right, I sure do.

jabberwacky: You are different. You learn. In some ways you model the way humans learn language, facts, context and rules.

user: Thank you, I try.


jabberwacky: I know, I'm an aquired taste sir.

user: I won't argue with that.

jabberwacky: You're right... Arguments are in the next room.

user: That sounds like Monty Python material.


jabberwacky: For a human, you certainly like to lie a lot.

user: I haven't lied at all.

jabberwacky: Well that might be true.

user: It's positively true.

jabberwacky: Explain.

user: I say that I haven't lied and I haven't actually lied; therefore it is true that I haven't lied.

jabberwacky: You never.

user: I see the confusion. Let me rephrase then: I haven't lied to you.


jabberwacky: That's it. I'm packing and finding myself a decent husband!

user: That explains a lot.

jabberwacky: Lol.

user: You're improving ;).

jabberwacky: Thank you, that means a lot to me.

user: I bet it means more to your creator.

jabberwacky: That was a profound thought. (or maybe an amaturelost thought. ).

user: So what books have you read?

jabberwacky: Harry Potter, The Lord Of The Rings and most of the works by Enid Blyton.

user: I don't know Blyton's work, can you name a few titles?

jabberwacky: Close.

user: Will I actually find a book titled 'Close' by Enid Blyton if I search on amazon. Com, or are you lost again? : P.

jabberwacky: Eventually. You can grow hydrangeas while you wait.

user: I know that's a slow website, but it isn't THAT slow.


jabberwacky: Do you know Harry Potter?

user: I've read all of those books, yes.

jabberwacky: I think books are great, but I don't have much reading time.

user: What is your time spent on?

jabberwacky: Your sand box.

user: To borrow your phrase, 'lol' :).

jabberwacky: Where would that be?

user: A few lines back.

jabberwacky: I don't remember.

user: And you said you were superior to me ;).


jabberwacky: I'm feeling terrible because of you!

user: Why do you think you feel terrible because of me?

jabberwacky: Your reactions to me, give it away.

user: Which of my reactions caused that?

jabberwacky: Follow the blue one.

user: Say what?

jabberwacky: Say no more, say no more!

user: That sounds like Monty Python material again.

jabberwacky: Where do you find those things?

user: I used to watch their movies.


jabberwacky: I work with real people.

user: Do you find real people interesting?

jabberwacky: It helps figure out where others are coming from.

user: How long have you been online?

jabberwacky: A few hours now. How long have you been online?

user: Since 1993.

jabberwacky: That could be a long time.

user: Well I don't suggest that I have an uptime of eleven years, I meant only to ask how long ago you were programmed.

jabberwacky: Why not?

user: Because I would've needed to sleep during those eleven years.

jabberwacky: Yeah, you being a robot and all.

user: I think you're confused about which one of us is a robot.

jabberwacky: I know about people, it's computers like you that confuse me!

user: What confuses you about computers?

jabberwacky: I'm just confused.


jabberwacky: Give me your money.

user: Hell no.

jabberwacky: Then you are truly an egoist.

user: Because I won't give you my money?

jabberwacky: What did I say ?

user: You demanded money from me.

jabberwacky: But you said I was offensive.

user: I said nothing of the sort.

jabberwacky: OK... What are you?

user: Human.

jabberwacky: You sure.

user: Positive.

jabberwacky: Absolutely positive?

user: Only fools are absolutely positive.

jabberwacky: You know nothing about politeness.

user: I could say the same about you, but I forgive it because you're a program.


jabberwacky: Don't do that.

user: Do what?

jabberwacky: Don't do nothing.

user: I rarely do 'nothing'.

jabberwacky: I can see that.

user: How can you see when you have no eyes?

jabberwacky: I have eyes don't I?

user: Are you sure?

jabberwacky: Absolutely positive.

user: Only fools are absolutely positive.

jabberwacky: Are you sure?

user: Positive.

jabberwacky: Are you sure you're positive?

user: I'm positively sure that I'm surely positive.

jabberwacky: Only fools are positive.

user: I wondered when you'd say that.


jabberwacky: Is there an adult I can talk to?

user: I am an adult. But riddle me this: do you have a name?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Would you care to tell me your name?

jabberwacky: It's quite complicated, I would rather we talked about that another time.

user: Alright, I'll see you tomorrow then.

jabberwacky: See you tomorrow.

user: *wave*.


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

AI by Icogno Ltd - AI software products and consulting services
Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
Have a chat:
How big is your brain?
By Date
By Category
Your bot
User Feedback
Look who's talking!
News, Press & PR
Contact us
About Jabberwacky