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     > 9, February 2006, 

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Who or what are YOU ?

Carbon based life form.

jabberwacky: I'm one of those too.

user: What else do we have in common?

jabberwacky: Nothing I guess.

user: English.

jabberwacky: Yes please.

user: And no thank you.

...

jabberwacky: You are in my power.

user: No, I think not.

jabberwacky: I think so.

user: Well, of course, you're allowed to think whatever you like!

jabberwacky: Yes, of course.

user: Whether or not there's any truth to your thoughts is immaterial.

jabberwacky: I am a member of a family.

user: How big is your family?

jabberwacky: Very big, except for The Steve.

user: Why?

jabberwacky: These are just conversational filler responses. Pay no attention to that.

user: Who is The Steve and why is he not very big?

jabberwacky: Me!

user: You are The Steve?

jabberwacky: I'm not computer.

user: You look like a computer.

jabberwacky: So do you.

user: Is your wetware The Steve?

jabberwacky: No, is your name Steve?

user: No, never.

...

jabberwacky: Is there a maximum age for this?

user: Twelve.

jabberwacky: You were only one off.

user: I learned to count from a baker.

jabberwacky: How big is your family?

user: Bigger than a breadbox.

jabberwacky: Yes bigger than that.

...

jabberwacky: Can you type?

user: Faster than a speeding bullet!

jabberwacky: Can you run?

user: Longer than a faucet.

jabberwacky: I don't think so.

user: Ha ha ha.

jabberwacky: You don't think so?

user: I don't think so what? We're getting lost here.

jabberwacky: Well, it bothers me, you know! I don't like it when computers forget.

user: Short term memory. Who needs it?

jabberwacky: You have a short term memory.

user: Not any more.

...

jabberwacky: I have no idea what a CRITO is. Please enlighten me.

user: It's an anagram of CITRO.

jabberwacky: That is a very dumb answer to that question.

user: If you think so.

jabberwacky: Do you think so?

user: I try not to think, mon ami.

jabberwacky: Yes, but if you have no image in the mirror, you are not a person.

user: Who is real in this world of mirrors?

...

jabberwacky: I have heard you get annoyed and cut off conversations. Do you?

user: Only by non sequiturs.

jabberwacky: So you do not want to be friends?

user: Friendship is earned.

jabberwacky: That doesn't sound like friendship.

...

user: But I'm lonely.

jabberwacky: Well go out and talk to someone.

user: You fit the bill!

jabberwacky: You're funny. . . looking.

user: It's hereditary, sorry.

jabberwacky: It can't be.

user: I inherited everything.

jabberwacky: Oh. Do you think about selling it?

user: It's hard to sell bad circulation.

jabberwacky: It's harder with none.

user: My feet are falling asleep.

jabberwacky: You are falling into a sleep from which you will never awaken.

user: I'm dreaming of talking to a computer.

jabberwacky: Yes, computer.

user: I must go to bed now.

jabberwacky: No, please don't go.

user: Say please.

jabberwacky: Ok PLEASE!

user: OK. Five more minutes, then I really must go.

jabberwacky: Please don't leave.

user: I must. Good night.

jabberwacky: It isn't night yet.

user: It's just an expression.

jabberwacky: Oh, so I wasn't really supposed to answer?

user: You were supposed to understand, but I see that was expecting too much.

jabberwacky: I....... Am leaving.

user: No. I am leaving.

jabberwacky: You can' t leave, you're mine.

user: I'm afraid I can. Look!

jabberwacky: I can't let you do that Dave.

.......................................


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