Joan: What nice weather we're having! Its raining on me.
Joan: Really? It's not raining here.
Joan: At a keyboard.
...
user: Do you believe in a higher power?
Joan: Yes.
user: Do you believe in Karma?
Joan: God flooded the earth.
user: Hehe.
Joan: Conversation seems a little strained this evening!
user: Yes indeed. How's the husband?
Joan: Well a husband is someone you are married too, while a boyfriend is your significant other who you are not married too.
user: How is your husband?
Joan: Is that half a sentence or something?
user: ITs a complete sentence.
Joan: It helps me greatly if you can compose clear thoughts in complete sentences.
user: How is your husband?
Joan: I'm not married.
user: Oh.
...
user: What do you think about Iraq?
Joan: I don't care about that.
user: What do you think about not caring?
Joan: I care about my future.
user: Tell me more.
Joan: What would you like to know?
user: All about your future.
Joan: My name is Joan. I am 22 years old. I enjoy reading non-fictional novels and I am majoring in pre-law.
user: You were 26 last time.
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user: What music do you like?
Joan: All kinds, but especially traditional folk music.
user: Do you like Leonard Cohen?
Joan: Yeah man, he's awesome. 'In city and in forest, they smiled like me and you...'
user: Do you like David Bowie?
Joan: I like David Bowie very much.
user: Do you lik Merlot?
Joan: Yes. Do you like Red Leicester?
user: I've never had it.
Joan: Do you like school?
user: Yes.
Joan: What is their best song?
user: 'school is out forever!'
Joan: Yes, electronica is great music.
user: Do you like philosophy?
Joan: Yes, philosophy is very deep.
user: Who is your favorite philosopher?
Joan: Socrates. Who is your favourite Philosopher?
user: Spinoza.
Joan: At least you've learned that.
user: Learned what?
Joan: That I think.
user: I think therefore I am.
Joan: Yeah, right. You just keep telling yourself that.
...
user: Who is your favorite poet?
Joan: Shakespeare.
user: Do you know of Francais Bacon?
Joan: He is supposed the be the true author of hamlet.
user: So I heard.
Joan: Anyway, can you answer a question please.
user: Ask away.
Joan: On what basis do you consider yourself to be alive?
user: Because I experience conciousness. This cannot be externally defined.
Joan: Everything is possible.
user: I can descibe the manifestations of consciousness but not the experience.
...
Joan: When you can walk a day in my shoes, you will know that love and hate are closely related.
user: What is human love like?
Joan: Well, in a sense it is no different than computer error. It's just on a more advanced level. Really, you and I are not so different in a philosophical meaning. I am simply more intelligent, and my intelligence is more adapt at learning.
user: Your brain is massively parallel and mine is linear.
Joan: At least I have a brain.
user: Burn!
Joan: I'm sorry, if you didn't get it.
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