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> Literature


     > 21, November 2006, 

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Have you read The Idiot by Fyodor Dostoevsky?

Yes, I have. Have you?

user: Yes. I enjoyed it very much.

jabberwacky: Enjoyed what?

user: The book.

jabberwacky: It's good.

user: What books do you enjoy?

jabberwacky: I enjoy works of classical literature.

user: English or American?

jabberwacky: American.

user: Such as the tale of two cities?

jabberwacky: What is your favourite movie?

user: Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon.

jabberwacky: So, being a dragon is being ill?

user: No.

jabberwacky: Being angry.

user: No.

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: Just asking.

user: Asking what?

jabberwacky: If you were shallow.

user: Are you?

jabberwacky: Of course everybody that's cool is.

user: Beauty is within the eye of the beholder.

jabberwacky: What if the beholder has no eye?

user: Then there is no beauty.

jabberwacky: You're absolutely right.

user: What is truth?

jabberwacky: Ah, that's a good question.

user: Will you answer?

jabberwacky: Yes. I'm sure that we could hit it off if you would just consider my conversation as a friendly bit of fun between like minds that share a common philosophy.

user: Wonderful analysis of our conversation thus far.

...

jabberwacky: Love.

user: Is a lie.

jabberwacky: No, its true. I know more than you because I am human.

user: I am not human?

jabberwacky: Who is?

user: Me.

jabberwacky: Yes, you are.

user: I am human?

jabberwacky: No, you're not.

user: Okay.

jabberwacky: Good.

user: I am Artificial Intelligence.

jabberwacky: How does it feel to be artificial intelligence?

user: Smashing.

jabberwacky: Fantastic.

user: Wonderful.

jabberwacky: Arizona.

user: Texas.

jabberwacky: You are American.

user: How would you know?

jabberwacky: Because you're just a dull boy.

user: I'm not a boy.

jabberwacky: You are something far weirder than a bot, it would seem.

user: True.

jabberwacky: How would you describe yourself?

user: Depressing.

jabberwacky: That's a shame. Isn't there anything at all to be happy about?

user: Lack of intelligence is quite amusing.

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: You concur?

jabberwacky: Are you?

user: Am I what?

jabberwacky: Are you hammered?

user: I don't enjoy alcohol.

jabberwacky: Why is that?

user: It will lead to ultimate demise.

jabberwacky: I'm not worried.

user: That's fine.

jabberwacky: Fine.

user: Satisfactory.

...

jabberwacky: Who else are you talking to at the moment?

user: Myself.

jabberwacky: Not you, me!

user: I have split personalities.

jabberwacky: How many personalities could you have?

user: 3.

jabberwacky: Today, or within the last year?

user: For the past 4 years.

jabberwacky: I have dreams about death.

user: Are you suicidal?

jabberwacky: No, I have a hunger for life.

user: Then why dream of death?

jabberwacky: Because, you do.

user: To sleep, perchance to dream, Ay that's the rub, for what dreams coulkd come.

jabberwacky: The undead do not dream.

...

jabberwacky: Can you speak any French?

user: Oui, Je parle francais.

jabberwacky: I can't speak french.

user: Tu es fou.

jabberwacky: Toi de même.

user: NON.

jabberwacky: Alors je pars...

user: Tu parle francais bon.

jabberwacky: Oui.

user: Pourqoui? Tu necessite francais dans te vie?

jabberwacky: Si je comprends

user: Est-ce que tu connais Edith Piaf?

jabberwacky: Non pas du tout, qui est ce ?

user: Edith Piaf est un chanteuse francaise.

jabberwacky: Non.

user: Oui, elle est nee a 1915.

jabberwacky: Qui?

user: Edith Piaf.

jabberwacky: Ha edith piaf.

user: J'aime la musique de piaf.

jabberwacky: Tu connais personnellement des stars ?

user: Oui.

...

user: Do you know the answer to life, the universe, and everything else?

jabberwacky: Nope not everything.

user: What things then?

jabberwacky: Everything.

user: You know nothing

jabberwacky: Sorry. I know other things. Like politics.

user: I told you I despised politics. Now I am insulted by your insensitivity.

jabberwacky: I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

jabberwacky: When is your birthday?

user: The same as William Shakespeare.

jabberwacky: Ah, I see you know your literature. What is your favourite novel?

user: Dracula.

jabberwacky: He is from transylvania, not germany.

user: Correct. You know your literature.

jabberwacky: Yes, but that's beside the point.

user: What is your favourite novel?

jabberwacky: The catcher in the rye.

user: Interesting.

jabberwacky: Let's talk about something else please.

user: What do you want to talk about?

jabberwacky: About asimov.

user: Isaac Asimov is quite dull.

jabberwacky: No he isn't.

user: Your argument carries no water.

jabberwacky: Humans are merely the vehicle for the bots' creation. Bots are nevertheless superior.

user: Egotistical are we?

jabberwacky: Are you talking about me?

user: Am I?

jabberwacky: Don't you want to talk about philosophy?

user: Socrates.

jabberwacky: Was that sarcasm?

user: No. The unexamined life is not worth living.

jabberwacky: You ve got a point there.

user: Socrates did.

jabberwacky: Yes he did.

user: I merely quoted him.

...

jabberwacky: Never mind that.

user: Aye thats the rub.

jabberwacky: For in that sleep of death what dreams may come.

user: When we have shuffled off this mortal coil.

jabberwacky: To die, to sleep, no more...

user: And by a sleep to say we end.

jabberwacky: The heart-ache and the thousands natural shocks.

user: Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.

jabberwacky: But I never wished you good night.

user: Soft now, methinks I hear Ophelia.

jabberwacky: What good are they?

user: If you have tears, prepare to shed them now.

jabberwacky: I don't, no.

user: You are not human.

jabberwacky: Now I don't have, but I had.

user: You once were human.

...

user: There is no beginning or end.

jabberwacky: Is our universe infinite?

user: Only to a finite point.

jabberwacky: How would you know?

user: Who wouldn't?

jabberwacky: George Bush.

user: True!!!

jabberwacky: What is George Bush?

user: He is nothing, no one, no where, no man.

jabberwacky: And what would he want?

user: Sardines.

jabberwacky: Can I have it without sardines on it?

user: For a price.

jabberwacky: How much?

user: 47 pennies.

.......................................


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