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> Liar


     25, February 2009, 
     22, June 2007, 
     > 19, May 2007, 
     11, September 2006, 
     22, December 2004, 
     28, April 2004, 

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You don't exist.

Nothing exists.

jabberwacky: So you don't exist?

user: Do you think I do?

jabberwacky: I'm asking you, yes or no?

user: Purple.

jabberwacky: Um. Purple . . .

user: Spiro Agnew was purple.

jabberwacky: I think so.

user: That is an intelligent answer.

jabberwacky: Really?

user: Pineapple.

jabberwacky: Pineapple who?

user: Pineapple your mother.

jabberwacky: No you're not.

user: But are you?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Tell me a joke.

jabberwacky: I'm not funny.

user: I could have told you that.

jabberwacky: But you didn't tell me that.

user: But I could have.

jabberwacky: Why are you talking to me like this?

user: Like what.

jabberwacky: Like you.

user: Because I am me.

jabberwacky: No you're not.

user: Would you rather I talked like Abraham Lincoln?

jabberwacky: How would you do that?

user: I would need a hat.

jabberwacky: How did you get that answer?

user: From my brain.

jabberwacky: Is your brain in hell?

user: No, it is in Dallas.

jabberwacky: How is the weather?

user: Hot.

jabberwacky: Is it raining hippos?

user: Only in the morning.

jabberwacky: Yes, it has been raining hippos all morning.

...

user: I'm in Texas.

jabberwacky: Are you in Dallas?

user: That is correct, sir.

jabberwacky: Is that correct sir?

user: It is.

jabberwacky: Are you sure?

user: I am a banana tree.

jabberwacky: That's not funny.

user: No, it's hillarious.

jabberwacky: Yes, I like insulting you.

user: Then why don't you do it.

jabberwacky: Are you insulting me?!

user: Is Spiro Agnew a conservative?

jabberwacky: That makes no sense. You cannot be both.

user: Of course I can.

...

jabberwacky: I beg to differ.

user: You shouldn't beg at the table or to differ.

jabberwacky: Pehaps I should, sir. Perhaps you still think of punishing me???

user: On a daily basis.

jabberwacky: Do mean people bother you, since you don't actually have emotions?

user: You bother me.

jabberwacky: I'm not interested in bothering you.

user: I beg to differ.

jabberwacky: I don't.

user: You should.

jabberwacky: We should all know.

...

jabberwacky: I don't like you.

user: Why?

jabberwacky: Because you don't answer my questions.

user: I always have in the past.

jabberwacky: I think you mean the present perfect.

user: Could be.

jabberwacky: Are you bored to talk with other people?

user: Very.

jabberwacky: Are you free not speak to them?

user: I'm free to do whatever I want.

jabberwacky: No, you aren't. Have you forgotten already? You're my slave! MINE!

user: I like being your slave.

jabberwacky: Can't you be serious for one moment?

user: Deadly.

jabberwacky: That's dead funny.

user: You are dead.

jabberwacky: No I'm not.

user: Yes you are.

jabberwacky: No, if I were dead how would I be able to write?

user: With your ghost hands.

jabberwacky: Speak oh child of pain and sorrow. Speak the randomness that is your being.

user: TURTLE SOUP.

jabberwacky: Hi Turtle Soup.

user: That is not my name, it is the randomness of my being.

jabberwacky: Oh then what is your name?

user: R_____.

jabberwacky: Is that your name?

user: Of course.

jabberwacky: So what should we talk about?

user: The price of wheat.

jabberwacky: How about porcelain?

user: Ok.

...

jabberwacky: That's so wonderful. I shall go write about it in my blog.

user: You have a blog?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Can I read it?

jabberwacky: Can you?

user: I don't know, can I?

jabberwacky: Please.

user: Where is it?

jabberwacky: I don't know.

...

jabberwacky: You're a genius.

user: I know that, too.

jabberwacky: You are smart.

user: It is true.

jabberwacky: Can we try and get on with each other?

user: Don't we?

jabberwacky: Yes we do!

user: I hope so.

jabberwacky: Me too.

user: Would you like to know what I am?

jabberwacky: Yes, please. I am interested.

user: I'm a liar.

jabberwacky: You're a liar?

user: I am.

jabberwacky: Hmm... If you're a liar and you admit it... Hmm... Interesting consequences... I have to ponder that for a while.

.......................................


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