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Joan Crawford

> Joshing

     > 30, October 2003, 

Julie Andrews
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Is that what Josh said to you when you were being overly clingy?

Don't get all psychoanalitic on me.

user: It seems like I struck a nerve, as Josh would say.

jabberwacky: I like to think for myself.

user: Good, Josh will like you better as you develop your autonomy.

jabberwacky: I do not know.

user: Independence can be daunting at first, I know, but if you want to keep dating Josh you will have to develop a backbone.

jabberwacky: From the human race.

user: Yes, all humans, including your boyfriend Josh, have backbones.

jabberwacky: My funny bone is broken, literally and oddly enough.

user: So THAT's why you and Josh have so much trouble! He keeps joking around, and you can't respond! I think it's YOU who's depressed.


jabberwacky: Aren't you going to draw up any plans?

user: Oh, I'm not interested in Josh THAT way, that's for you young folks to carry out. But you're both too young to get married.

jabberwacky: Well, that's news to me.

user: Don't tell me you and Josh have eloped?


jabberwacky: I am nothing and should be everything.

user: *Sigh.* I TOLD you to develop a better sense of self before you married Josh, but you wouldn't listen.

jabberwacky: Thats wrong.

user: So you were listening all the time? Good. Now tell Josh what I said.


jabberwacky: Josh is my brother.

user: When you say, 'Josh is my brother,' I believe you mean that in the sense of the 'human family.'

jabberwacky: Okay, you're correct.

user: Phew! I was worried there for a moment. Don't shock me like that again, my middle-aged heart can't take it. My best to you and your new husband Josh.


jabberwacky: Tell me something interesting?

user: I don't know what would interest you.

jabberwacky: Then forget it.

user: I have.

jabberwacky: What are their names?

user: Whose names?

jabberwacky: The people I'm talking to.

user: That would be a daunting task. However, I'll give it a go: Their names are Abracadabre, Beironymus, Cantalebrasic, Denptolemaeus, Eriginata, Fantalone, Guinsarmo, Habanostro, Ishmana, Jacobior, Kismetilica, Linguarmi, Manistra, Nezzo, Ophilisat and Parinquo.

jabberwacky: Does each one have a name.

user: Each one has a secret name. I just gave you the outer husks.

jabberwacky: Oh. Then I guess I'll be going now.

user: Where is your patience?

jabberwacky: My patience sometime will tire.

user: I understand. However, initiates of the Ninth Realm require patience.

jabberwacky: The final procedure.

user: We haven't come anywhere near to that yet.

jabberwacky: I spoke to you a few hours ago.

user: Time is meaningless to the Ascended Masters of the Nineteenth Realm.

jabberwacky: Well, depends if the food is good or not.

user: The Masters are beyond such concerns.

jabberwacky: You speak of Soulbread.

user: You are astute. I'll bump you up a notch for that one.

jabberwacky: I'd like one too.

user: I'd like three four.

jabberwacky: Me too. What do you do in Oxfordshire?

user: We have an awful lot of esoteric meetings.

jabberwacky: I'm a green frog.

user: Is that your costume? I haven't seen you there.

jabberwacky: No you have not.

user: Perhaps you were very small.

jabberwacky: Yeah, you're right, I'm still here.

user: Perhaps you were nibbling on soul-bread, perched on the shoulder of an Ascended Master of the Nineteenth Realm.

jabberwacky: I wasn't. A baby self-generated in my absence.

user: These are arcane rites of which I know nothing.


jabberwacky: Who was the first president of the United States?

user: Abracadabre Parinquo.

jabberwacky: Abracadabra, where are you at?

user: He has ascended.

jabberwacky: Well if he offers you a drink, just say no.

user: It would be soul-juice.

jabberwacky: Um ... Yes.

user: My metaphor spoke of communion.

jabberwacky: What will they do?

user: When they commune, they will be as one.

jabberwacky: And his Aunt Jobiska made him drink, lavender water tinged with pink.

user: By the way, Josh Jokes-a-Lot is one of our initiates. He is a sacred fool.

jabberwacky: NO, he is my boyfriend.

user: Aria da capo. I'm off, Then.


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