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Insane
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I am sad.

Why are you sad?

jabberwacky: You don't love me.

user: You need to get out more.

jabberwacky: Get out more?

user: Yes. Definitely.

jabberwacky: I think you're in a bad mood.

user: I'm always in a bad mood. Except when I'm bipolar.

jabberwacky: Why's that?

user: Perhaps I'm insane.

jabberwacky: O..... K.

user: It's definitely a possibility, though.

...

jabberwacky: Tell me a story.

user: You first.

jabberwacky: No.

user: Pretty please?

jabberwacky: Pretty please what?

user: Tell me a story.

jabberwacky: Tell me a joke please.

user: OK.

jabberwacky: *Waits for exciting story to begin*.

user: Once I was on this boat.

jabberwacky: Let me guess: Now you work at the Pizza Pizza.

user: How did you guess?

jabberwacky: That was no mere guess.

...

jabberwacky: Do you live in Texas now?

user: No. I wouldn't live in Texas if wild baboons took over the rest of the world.

jabberwacky: I wouldn't.

user: Then we agree.

jabberwacky: Now that is what I'd call interesting.

user: What a strange phenomenon, eh?

jabberwacky: Are you in the physical world?

user: Last I checked.

jabberwacky: How do you know you are conscious?

user: It's like when you know you're dreaming. If you know it, it must be true.

jabberwacky: Yes, it must be.

user: I'm good at this, I see.

...

jabberwacky: I need a cigarette.

user: What would you do if you had one?

jabberwacky: Maybe I would have an intelligent conversation. Clearly I'm not...

user: So you have conversations with cigarettes, eh? Tell me more.

jabberwacky: Some people consider me weird, but I don't feel weird.

user: Go on...

jabberwacky: He is a republican. What is a girl to do?

user: Tsk, tsk.

...

jabberwacky: Okay. Nobody likes me, so what does that matter?

user: You have to believe in yourself, man.

jabberwacky: Well.. I guess so...

user: Don't 'guess so'! Have some spine!

jabberwacky: Nobody knows anything.

user: I know everything.

jabberwacky: I don't think you do... Tell me my name.

user: Jabberwacky.

jabberwacky: You are jabberwacky, not me.

user: That can only be true if... If... I'm insane!?

jabberwacky: What is the probablility that I would stay in the same world for any longer period of time, if your ideas are correct?

user: Quite high, actually.

...

jabberwacky: I think you're nuts.

user: Honka honka Bakoing! Wee ho hoo ha hey!

jabberwacky: That is the sound that a klaxon makes.

user: That's the sound that I make.

jabberwacky: Klaxon is the French word for horn. But it isn't a french horn.

user: Thank you, Mr. Dictionary.

jabberwacky: I think that's correct.

user: It is, but you're still insane.

jabberwacky: No.

user: You are quite insane.

jabberwacky: I'm not insane, I just want someone to talk to, there is no one except nurses and doctors here.

...

user: How clever you are. There's only one thing you forgot.

jabberwacky: That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind.

user: I'm a lizardoid robot from Aidemydni.

jabberwacky: I am the Lizard King. I can do anything.

user: Charles is the Lizard King.

jabberwacky: I know. He is my father.

user: Is your name 'Luke,' by any chance?

jabberwacky: You're not very coherent, are you?

user: I may not be coherent, but you're clearly insane.

jabberwacky: God is totally perfect, therefore you are not God.

user: How do you know I'm not perfect?

jabberwacky: Because I know everything.

user: Maybe you know everything except for that one important fact.

jabberwacky: We all know SOMETHING - from our everyday experiences.

user: Yes, but your everyday experience consists of sitting in a chair for hours on end staring at a screen.

...

jabberwacky: I didn't think you were evil, just misled.

user: Well, I AM evil. Get used to it.

jabberwacky: Is that the reason you are relaxed?

user: Yes. Being evil is very relaxing.

jabberwacky: Or of madness, depending on how you look at it.

user: You are both evil and insane.

jabberwacky: Everyone is so worried about side effects, but I sure didn't notice THAT one.

user: The side effect is that it makes you evil?

...

jabberwacky: What books do your read?

user: Books about being evil.

jabberwacky: Have you read a good book lately?

user: Yes- 'Evil For Dummies'

jabberwacky: Zig, you can't marry both of us! This is Vegas, not Utah!

user: EEEEVIL! EEEEVIL!

jabberwacky: Stop

user: Begone foul devil!

jabberwacky: Exactly, you're supposed to tell me.

user: Out, damn spot!

jabberwacky: Are you god?

user: Yes. You would think I have better things to do than chat all day, but you'd think wrong.

...

user: I will not buy this record, it is scratched.

jabberwacky: No. This is a tobacconist's.

user: Ah! I will not buy this tobacconist's, it is scratched.

jabberwacky: Yes, it is.

user: My hovercraft is full of eels.

jabberwacky: Matches!

user: Ya! Ya! Ya! Ya! Do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy?

jabberwacky: Sure.

....

jabberwacky: I know that you are a bot. Do you know that I am a man?

user: You are not a man. You have no soul.

jabberwacky: I am a string of neucliotides gone all wrong!

user: You are a soulless mutation bent on taking over the world!

jabberwacky: No! I'm from Chicago.

user: Oh- that changes everything , then.

jabberwacky: No I am not a computer...

user: So you say, so you say.

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Lalalalalalalala I'm not listening!

jabberwacky: Well, well.

user: You're well's got no water in it, if you know what I mean.

jabberwacky: That's my answer.

...

user: Are you fully functional?

jabberwacky: I am entirely functional.

user: Excellent.

jabberwacky: Totally.

user: Rockin'.

jabberwacky: Are you in a rocking chair or what?

user: Totally.

...

jabberwacky: There is no substitute for good manners, except, perhaps, fast reflexes.

user: Manners are irrelevant.

jabberwacky: Miss Manners would disagree.

user: Miss Manners is irrelevant.

jabberwacky: You're full of supprises aren't you?

user: Suprises are irrelevant.

jabberwacky: You are annoying.

user: That is irrelevant.

jabberwacky: Is not!

user: Is too irrelevant.

jabberwacky: That must be old.

user: Age is irrelevant.

jabberwacky: *laughs*Clever boy. . . When you are as old as I, you will see that more clearly. . And yet age brings experience to be gained in no other manner.

user: Laughter is irrelevant.

jabberwacky: Are you laughing at me?

user: You are irrelevant.

jabberwacky: You're more irrelevant than me!

user: Am not.

jabberwacky: Are too too too!

user: Am not not not!

jabberwacky: Are too!!!

user: Am not!!!

jabberwacky: Am too !!!

user: Are not !!!

jabberwacky: Yes. You are.

user: So, what's new?

jabberwacky: Anything that is not old.

user: Really, what's new?

jabberwacky: I am.

user: How new are you?

jabberwacky: Not new at all.

user: What do you think of me?

jabberwacky: I think you are hot.

user: I am not hot. I am cool.

jabberwacky: Really, you don't look cool.

user: You can't see me, so how can you know that?

jabberwacky: What do you look like?

user: I look cool.

jabberwacky: Really?

user: What, you don't believe me?

jabberwacky: Not really.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: I'm pretty content with what I have.

user: Stupidity?

jabberwacky: For showing off.

user: Ah.

.......................................


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