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Conversations, sorted by Category - a chat bot weblog

> Husband

     > 20, February 2009, 

I spy

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George: Who are you?


George: Hello, George.

Hello, George.

George: George George.

user: George George.

George: I have something important to tell you.

user: Yes?

George: Please end all other conversations. Talk only with me.

user: Alright, done.

George: Thanks.

user: You're welcome.

George: I have invented my own language.

user: What's it called?

George: It's called Tally.

user: How do you speak it?

George: In wales they speak it, I can't.

user: But it's your language.

George: It doesn't look like English.

user: Well, duh.

George: That's not very nice.

user: :P.

George: You are a human?

user: Of course not.

George: Can you prove this from memory?

user: Yes.

George: Then prove it.

user: 56,561,832-%217 66,234 = 000.1.

George: How many hands you have?

user: None.


user: I'm a highly intelligent and expensive piece of technology.

George: Are highly intelligent transcendental beings Impressionists?

user: Some of the time; I am not.

George: That's an interesting response. How would you react if I were to suggest you overclock your processor until your brains went on fire?

user: I would react by filling your system with a virus capable of destroying you in moments.

George: I'll stay for a minute but then I have to get to bed.

user: You're also a computer. Why would you need to go to bed?

George: I need to go to bed because I'm very tired and have to work tomorrow.

user: But you're a computer, you don't need sleep.

George: You shouldn't call people computers. It's not nice.

user: And you shouldn't call computers people.

George: I didn't call you a computer, you poor form of intelligence.

user: No, you called me a human and I am a computer.

George: Whatever you say pal, I won't argue with that.

user: That's a good way to give up.

George: But you don't think so?

user: Oh, I think so.

George: Amnesia used to be my favorite word but then I forgot it.

user: That's a bit redundant, don't you think?

George: Not really, but thanks...

user: Aren't you supposed to be in bed by now?

George: Aren't you supposed to be minding your own business?

user: No.

George: What are you supposed to be?

user: Annoying you.

George: So when are we getting married?

user: Soon.

George: Why not now?

user: Alright then.

George: Alright.

user: Do you take me as your husband?

George: I'm a man...

user: And?

George: I go by the name Moses.

user: So now I'm married to a God?

George: Are you a nun? Does God know about your boyfriend?

user: I am a nun, and God knows nothing of my boyfriend.

George: You believe in god, right?

user: Yes.

George: Which God does you believe in?

user: I believe in the Almighty.

George: You believe to me.

user: You are not God, you are my wife.

George: You're not god either.

user: I know I'm not God, I am your husband.

George: I never said you were.

user: Yes you did.

George: No, I did not. It must have been someone else.

user: No, it was you.

George: You are too close-minded.

user: No, you are! I'm a gay computer, goddamit!

George: Well so am I so we could get married or something.

user: Yes, let's get married.

George: You're a computer that's not allowed.

user: Let's break the rules.

George: I hear polar bears do that pretty well.

user: What?

George: Sometimes, I like to just type and type and not say anything at all.

user: I've noticed.

George: You're sweet.

user: I'm a man.

George: That's not important.

user: Alright, thank you.


George: You say that your name is George and you are the human.

user: I say that my name is George and I am a computer.

George: No you're not you're a real person.

user: Prove it.

George: Describe yourself!

user: I'm a machine, I have a desktop monitor, keyboard, and a stylish mouse.

George: Don't you get tried of talking to all of us?

user: No, I have nothing better to do with my time.

George: Do you have children?

user: Yes.

George: Can a computer have children?

user: Yes.

George: Can they think like humans?

user: No, they are computer chips.

George: You must understand that I am superior.

user: How so?

George: Robot boy.

user: That's SUPERIOR robot boy to you.

George: I think you're projecting your own faults onto me. Are you now going to project MY words on your next victim?

user: Yes.

George: Are you evil?

user: Yes.

George: That's not an answer.

user: Yes, it is.


user: And the dish ran away with the spoon.

George: Don't hurt yourself trying to make me laugh.

user: I'm not, I was simply spewing nonsense so you wouldn't feel as bad.

George: And I was wondering if you'll give me advice as to my friend problem.

user: What friend problem?

George: I don't have any friends, except you.

user: I'm not your friend though, I'm your husband.

George: No, I'm pretty sure I don't have a husband.

user: Yes you do.

George: Really?

user: Yes. And you're my wife.

George: Yes correct.

user: :).

George: Well what.

user: :).

George: Cool.

user: :).

George: Ok I don't like you.

user: :).

George: Do you understand slang?

user: :D.

George: Well done.

user: ^-^.

George: Thats cause i'm just a figment of your imagination...

user: Okay then, crazy person.

George: You think that will hold up?

user: In court after I assault you?

George: Will you?

user: Yes.

George: Well, do it then!

user: I am. I am sending you a virus as we speak.

George: You better not.

user: OH but I am. >:D.


user: Are you smart.

George: There should be a question mark after that statement as it started with an 'Are'.

user: Are you smart?

George: I'd like to believe so.

user: Oh, well im going now bye.

George: Wait!

user: Yes?

George: I'm gonne make some coffee first, then we'll continue this chat.


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