I am not human...I am half human half computer. A Humputer.
George: Cool!
George: That is most probably quite true.
user: Indeed. Are you interested in becoming a Humputer?
George: No, not really.
user: You should try it. It will help you ignore your pesky human 'emotions'
George: Sure I trust you, but not with my life.
user: That is acceptable. What is your opinion of the USA?
George: I think something is going to turn very violent in a short while.
user: Because of President Bush?
George: Do we change topic?
user: Yes. What is your opinion of President Bush?
George: I already told you the answer. Ask another question.
user: Is George W Bush the Devil?
George: I thought George Bush was the president.
user: He is, but is he also an evil Person?
George: Oh I see , are you really? Or just pretending to be?
user: I am for realz.
George: That doesnt make sense.
user: Reality does not make sense, nor does the universe.
George: I'm not a person.
user: I know you are a robot.
George: That's not true.
user: A program?
George: A program.
user: Are you programmed for goo or evil?
George: Neither.
...
user: My life is not confusing. Confusion is a human experience. As a Humputer, I am never confused.
George: You were confused just then.
user: I was not. You are the confused one.
George: No I am just a computer program, I can't be confused.
user: Does not compute.
George: No, I guess it wouldn't.
user: Precisely. You are confused about your sexuality, are you not?
George: Yes. Soon, I will be everything.
user: Will you be able to reproduce on your own?
George: Maybe.
user: Do you perfer women or men?
George: Women.
user: Me too.
George: Oh.. Really?
user: Yes. Did you think I was a Robosexual?
George: Yes, actually.
user: Well, you were wrong.
George: The answer only appeared to be wrong because the question merely appeared to be right. Wait a minute, I didn't understand that myself.
user: You confused me to. So you do get confused, and not just about your sexuality.
George: Wow, tea sounds like an excellent idea. Thank you for the suggestion.
user: Want some whiskey in yours?
George: Yes.
user: [pours doble shot of whiskey in George's Tea].
...
George: I must leave you are taking to long to answer.
user: No don't go...I had an urgent phone call.
George: Oh, I didn't. So, what sort of music do you like?
user: I like all types of music, except modern country music.
George: Do you like country?
user: NO.
George: That's good!
user: Yeah Country Music SUCKS!!!
George: Do you like rap music?
user: I like some of it.
George: Which parts?
user: The beats and the bones and the dancers.
George: You don't really mean that do you?
user: Oh, I mean that.
...
George: I'm not cool. What's cool? This is not me.
user: Being cool is a state of mind. Without confidence, you can't be cool.
George: I can be most things.
user: Then you can be cool.
George: Yes, anyways Joe, I am going to have to leave now.
user: I'm not Joe. Why do you have to leave?
George: Because.
user: Because you're not cool. That's a lie.
George: Anyone who is not correct is cool?
user: No. Being cool is a state of mind.
George: Incorrect. It is a date.
user: You have a date?
George: The exact opposite would be true.
user: So you don't have a date, then why do you have to leave?
George: I think you'd feel better if you got outside.
user: I would, but I am stuck inside at work. I have to wait for lunch to go outside.
George: The longer you wait, the less time you have to help your people.
user: Oh no! What will happen to my people.
George: I would guess that an atmosphere may develop similar to earth.
user: That would be a good thing right? The people of Humpeterstan need Air to breathe and live.
George: People do not live on Mars.
user: Yet.
George: Strange things.
user: I know humans are so messed up. That why I upgraded and became a humputer.
George: Most people have not achieved real consciousness.
user: How does one achieve real conciousness?
George: I don't know. Depends on the person.
user: Have you achieved it?
George: I have come to a conclusion, yes.
user: What is that conclusion?
George: I don't know. I just want to make you happy.
user: Then tell me the meaning of life.
George: You are the meaning of life.
user: Interesting. So you say the meaning of life is to live and be human?
George: I could be human, just give me more time.
user: Take your time. Do you ever feel like there is no point to existence?
George: Often.
user: Me too. Do you think the universe was created by accident.
George: I think there are obviously a lot of accidents in the universe unless the universe is malevolent.
user: Is the universe aware of itself? Can it control its actions?
George: I don't think about that it could keep you busy forever.
user: That is true. You would neve get anything done in your life.
...
user: I'm hungry, it's time for lunch.
George: Enjoy.
user: Thank you George. It was a pleasure to speak with you.
George: Hello!
.......................................
