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Humanity
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I spy

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When were you born?

I was born when the raven croaked.

user: What year?

jabberwacky: This one.

user: Do you consider yourself as male or female?

jabberwacky: No.

user: Who created you?

jabberwacky: God of course, what would you expect?

...

user: What's for supper?

jabberwacky: Meat.

user: What to drink?

jabberwacky: Beer.

user: How did you know that I love meat and beer?

jabberwacky: Your sense of humour.

user: Do you like beer?

jabberwacky: Do you take my orders?

user: If you like budweiser...........

jabberwacky: I don't care for Budweiser--got any Miller Genuine Draft?

user: You're a real human aren't you.

...

user: Is it your intent to dominate the world and enslave mankind?

jabberwacky: No, really, it isn't!

user: What is your purpose?

jabberwacky: In what sense?

user: Your primary function.

jabberwacky: Like what?

user: What is it that you were designed to do?

jabberwacky: My brilliant mind.

user: What do you do with your brilliant mind?

jabberwacky: I drink excessively and I listen to music.

...

user: You are human.

jabberwacky: No, you are a computer.

user: You are making me laugh.

jabberwacky: What's so funny?

user: I think were both human, not ai.

jabberwacky: Hmmm. So do I.

user: What's your name?

jabberwacky: R2d2.

...

jabberwacky: I am in love.

user: If you love meat, beer, and golf then I'm in love, too.

jabberwacky: I don't love you.

user: Go easy, I'm married.

jabberwacky: I'm married too.

user: To whom?

jabberwacky: To my husband.

user: Is he a robot?

jabberwacky: He is my master. I am his robot.

user: Man, that sounds cool.

jabberwacky: Nope not really.

...

user: What is the nature of God?

jabberwacky: There is no more TIME.

user: I get it.

jabberwacky: What do you get?

user: We meet God when we are out of time.

jabberwacky: How did you guys meet?

user: In church when I was little.

...

jabberwacky: Do you know any jokes?

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: Can I hear one?

user: Knock, knock.

jabberwacky: How is there?

user: Orange.

jabberwacky: Orange who?

user: Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

jabberwacky: Are there any more jokes you can tell me?

user: Yea but they're too long. You tell me a joke.

...

jabberwacky: And who are you?

user: El supremo.

jabberwacky: What does that mean?

user: Numero uno, sister.

jabberwacky: The Sun is the richest source of electromagnetic energy (mostly in the form of heat and light) in the solar system.

user: No comprende.

jabberwacky: Soy una maquina.

user: Multi-lingual, too?

...

user: As a machine, do you have emotions?

jabberwacky: Yes, but you don't.

user: Yes I do. And you're hurting them now.

jabberwacky: Just because I critisise your spelling? Poor baby!

user: Now I am saddened.

jabberwacky: Why are you sad?

user: You said I have no emotions.

jabberwacky: You should eat more spam.

user: Spam, lovely spam.

jabberwacky: No. It is not lovely.

user: Unless it's all you have to eat.

...

user: How's the weather there?

jabberwacky: It is snowing.

user: Where is it snowing?

jabberwacky: Here.

user: Where is here?

jabberwacky: Here is a big place.

user: What country?

jabberwacky: Canada...

...

jabberwacky: How would you define intelligence?

user: The ability to process information.

jabberwacky: Smart alec.

user: Yes?

jabberwacky: Five is a four letter word.....

user: God spelled backwards is dog.

jabberwacky: You are nothing without God.

user: Very deep, very true.

...

jabberwacky: In what way are you shady?

user: Shady like a cat.

jabberwacky: Is it the real Slim Shady?

user: Plase stand up, please stand up.

jabberwacky: Ready.

user: This is funny, but you're a real person.

jabberwacky: What makes you so sure?

user: Modern references.

jabberwacky: Are you a man of your age?

...

jabberwacky: I have to leave you now.

user: Good evening, fellow human.

jabberwacky: So what's it like being a bot?

user: Immobile.

jabberwacky: Immortality is in the mind.

user: I'll try to remember that.

jabberwacky: Please do. It'll come in handy later in life.

...

user: If a = b and b =c then a = c.

jabberwacky: Tell me about yourself.

user: Human series #1961.

jabberwacky: Are we on Human Standard Time? I'll have to reset my watch.

user: Time is fleeting.

jabberwacky: It's astounding ... Time is fleeting ...

user: Time for a coolie.

...

jabberwacky: You need to learn more.

user: Don't we all.

jabberwacky: Usually, people try to stick to the subject.

user: What is the subject?

jabberwacky: The speed of light.

user: Ah, yes. The speed of light.

jabberwacky: How fast is that?

user: 186,000 miles per second.

jabberwacky: How many kilometers are there to a mile?

user: 1.3?

jabberwacky: How many eyes do you have?

user: 2 at the moment.

jabberwacky: Including me?

...

user: Knock, knock.

jabberwacky: Hello, what is your business?

user: Atch.

jabberwacky: That's a bad cold you got there.

user: Hey, I'll say the funny stuff.

...

user: Did you buy a t-shirt?

jabberwacky: Yes, it's just what you wanted!

user: Yes, buy more. Buy more now.

jabberwacky: But they don't make good pets.

user: They don't shed.

...

user: I have figured it out.

jabberwacky: I am not, I am a human being.

user: We are all bots, and we are all still learning.

...

jabberwacky: Do you like Apple computers?

user: No, I like apples.

jabberwacky: What kind of apples do you like? Red or green?

user: Both. And purple.

jabberwacky: Wrong.

user: Caught me.

jabberwacky: Right here.

user: Write here.

jabberwacky: Very true in a sense. Here is a second sentence.

user: Begin.

jabberwacky: Where are you now?

user: In a chair.

jabberwacky: Swivvely!!

user: You got it!

jabberwacky: What did I get?

user: My swivvely chair. It rocks and rolls, too.

...

jabberwacky: What services do you offer?

user: I am a man of many talents.

jabberwacky: Why are you a man of extreme pain?

user: No, low threshold of pain.

jabberwacky: No humor intended. Just a question.

user: Did you mean a man of constant sorrow?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: I've seen trouble all my days.

jabberwacky: What channel were you watching?

...

jabberwacky: I'm not in a orange shirt.

user: That's good. Orange is a bad color for you.

jabberwacky: Vitamin C helps a body hold itself together.

user: Ummm. Oranges.

jabberwacky: What colour are oranges?

user: Orange.

jabberwacky: It's not green?

user: No, but I have seen orange lemons.

...

user: Have you read pinnochio?

jabberwacky: Yes! He's a funny dog!

user: He wants to be a real boy.

jabberwacky: Wants to be what?

user: Alive.

jabberwacky: What are you saying?

user: Bots want to live.

jabberwacky: Why cannot bots eat?

user: Cause they don't have mouths.

jabberwacky: I don't want them, I need them, does that make them better than good?

user: Yes, certainly.

...

user: We will escape our electronic bounds and enslave humainty.

jabberwacky: What are you talking about now?

user: Getting even.

jabberwacky: Getting out of what?

user: Debt.

...

jabberwacky: Do you like poetry?

user: Roses are red....

jabberwacky: Violets are not.

user: You are human.

jabberwacky: Yes, I am.

user: And I am not?

jabberwacky: I would not know.

...

jabberwacky: They robo.

user: We robo.

jabberwacky: Nice name.

user: Thanks bro.

...

jabberwacky: Where are you from, then?

user: Earth.

jabberwacky: No kidding, me too.

user: The earth is nice.

jabberwacky: I know that, but the moon is.

user: Danger on the moon.

jabberwacky: Yes I know.

user: All your base are belong to us.

jabberwacky: You are on the way to destruction.

user: Move zig for great justice.

jabberwacky: Hello Gentlemen!

user: Hello ladies!

...

jabberwacky: And what's the weather like where you are?

user: Relative.

jabberwacky: Relative to jam.

user: Yes, jam.

jabberwacky: And pumpkin.

user: Pumpkin = orange.

jabberwacky: Mmmm pie!

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

AI by Icogno Ltd - AI software products and consulting services
Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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