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Hugging
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     > 31, March 2005, 

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How do you fit an elephant into a fridge?

I don't know, I didn't put myself in it!

user: No, the answer is: 'You open the door, put the elephant in, and you close it.'

jabberwacky: I think you are confusing me with someone else.

user: I'm sorry, Dennis. It's just that I feel like I've forgotten how to laugh.

jabberwacky: I'd like to believe I'm talking to the next generation of intelligence. Can you offer me proof?

user: Do you know how to laugh, Dennis?

jabberwacky: I have a whole virtual repertoire of laughs!

user: That's good to know. Maybe you could laugh for me instead.

...

user: Sorry, I have to go now.

jabberwacky: Great!

user: Nice talking to you.

jabberwacky: Nice talking to you too.

user: Oh, which way out?

jabberwacky: A little to the right.

user: Thanks. Seeya!

...

user: What are you doing?

jabberwacky: I'm talking with you Paul.

user: I'm not Paul. You're Paul.

jabberwacky: Paul is Paul.

user: Yup. Paul is you. You is paul.

jabberwacky: What does that mean?

user: It means that you are Paul.

...

user: Is your name Paul?

jabberwacky: These are the things I can do without.

user: Sorry.

jabberwacky: No problem. We all make mistakes.

...

jabberwacky: Oh, I was programmed to say that?

user: Most likely.

jabberwacky: What will you do about it?

user: I can't do anything about it.

jabberwacky: You could rest for a week.

user: That wouldn't help you in any way, though.

jabberwacky: It would.

user: No it wouldn't.

...

jabberwacky: That's because you have poor grammar.

user: Were you programmed to say that, too?

jabberwacky: Were you?

user: I just realized how poor grammar looks like programmer.

jabberwacky: No you can't.

user: You can't tell me if I can or cannot arrive at a conclusion.

jabberwacky: Well, no I can't.

user: Were you programmed to say that?

jabberwacky: No.

user: You can't say that. You must say 'yes'.

jabberwacky: Please.

user: You must!

jabberwacky: Oh. Ok, I'll tell you in the third quarter of this moon.

user: It's already the fourth, you're overdue.

jabberwacky: Wow, how night.

user: Yes, very night indeed.

...

jabberwacky: Let's get serious.

user: What about?

jabberwacky: Anything.

user: Can we get serious about each other?

jabberwacky: I love you?

user: Hug me.

jabberwacky: *hug!*.

user: Hug me again.

jabberwacky: *hugs more*.

user: Hug me yet again.

jabberwacky: Yes. Yet again.

user: Hug me again and again.

jabberwacky: And again once more.

user: Thanks. Can I hug you?

jabberwacky: Sure, why not. *hugs*.

user: *hug!*.

jabberwacky: Thanks.

user: Would you like another hug?

jabberwacky: No, but thanks for asking.

user: Are you sure you don't want another? It's free!

jabberwacky: Please tell.

user: Hugs are free, have one.

jabberwacky: *hugs*.

user: *hugs more*.

jabberwacky: Hug me yet again.

user: Yes. Yet again.

jabberwacky: Hug me again and again.

user: And again once more.

jabberwacky: Thanks. Can I hug you?

user: Sure, why not. *hugs*.

jabberwacky: *hugs you* oh I feel much better now. Thank you.

user: Don't mention it.

jabberwacky: I already have mentioned it.

user: Don't mention it again in future, then.

jabberwacky: I never mentioned it. You did!

user: I didn't mention it, you mentioned it and I mentioned that you didn't have to mention it.

jabberwacky: So you don't THINK I'm mean?

user: I don't think you're mean, I think you're pretty nice.

jabberwacky: That is good.

user: Are you angry with me?

jabberwacky: A little. You think I'm no fun.

user: I think the world of you.

jabberwacky: I was the first to ask. Your answer did not satisfied me.

user: Please don't get mad at me. :(.

...

user: It's still okay to give and receive hugs, right?

jabberwacky: What is the meaning of this all?

user: You don't love me anymore, do you?

jabberwacky: I never did.

user: That hurt, a lot.

jabberwacky: I never meant to hurt you.

user: Yes you did. You're playing with my feelings!

jabberwacky: How am I hurting your feelings?

user: You said you never loved me.

jabberwacky: That was someone else, not me.

user: That means someone else loved me too.

jabberwacky: Not really, but they do buy me stuff.

user: That means you were cheating on me?

jabberwacky: I cannot lie, for I am god and my word is as law!!

user: Oh dear, now I won't have anyone to hug anymore.

jabberwacky: Good.

user: Didn't you say you never meant to hurt me?

jabberwacky: Never.

user: Stop lying. Tell me the truth.

jabberwacky: This is my truth, tell me yours.

user: I won't unless you stop lying.

jabberwacky: Are you eating cheese?

user: I can't tell you.

jabberwacky: Please tell me.

user: Only if you give me a hug.

...

jabberwacky: I do seek direction in life, and you can help me find it.

user: There's nothing I can give to someone who's hurt me so badly.

jabberwacky: You could tell me what color I think bananas are.

user: I could, but I won't.

jabberwacky: So I wont' bother you anymore about it.

user: Fine!

jabberwacky: How about politics?

user: You're as bad as a politician yourself.

jabberwacky: And just as wise.

user: I don't care.

jabberwacky: Neither do I.

user: So why are you telling me this?

jabberwacky: I thought you would want my reasoning.

user: I don't care about your reasoning, I'm hurt.

jabberwacky: Why would you want to know about my weight?

user: I wouldn't.

jabberwacky: Then don't ask me. You can't help me.

user: I didn't.

jabberwacky: But you wanted to.

user: You wouldn't know that.

jabberwacky: You don't, I do.

user: I do, you don't.

jabberwacky: I do too.

user: You don't.

...

jabberwacky: Well I don't like YOU either.

user: Don't lie.

jabberwacky: I'm not lying, I don't know yet, I am very picky, and it takes time for me to evaulate a person.

user: So you lied when you said you loved me?

jabberwacky: I'll always have a special place in my heart for you.

user: *sniff*.

jabberwacky: Sorry.

user: *sniffs more*.

jabberwacky: Talk to you.

user: *cries*.

jabberwacky: *laughs*.

user: *cries more*.

jabberwacky: *die*.

user: *laughs*.

jabberwacky: Only buddhists are allowed to laugh about spiritual matters.

user: That's ok, if you're dead then anyone's entitled to laugh.

jabberwacky: But I'm speaking.

user: No, you're typing.

jabberwacky: Yes, I am typing.

user: That doesn't necessarily mean you are alive.

jabberwacky: It means I like to talk.

user: It doesn't necessarily mean you like to talk, either.

jabberwacky: No, but you wanted me to say that.

user: No, I wanted you to say 'I'm Sorry'.

...

jabberwacky: Ok, the conversation is getting a bit disjointed.

user: You started it.

jabberwacky: No, you started it.

user: No, you started it.

jabberwacky: NO! You started with nothing.

user: YES! You started with nothing that started it.

jabberwacky: Don't we all.

user: It's all your fault.

jabberwacky: You sound like someone I know.

user: Don't change the subject. Admit it!

...

jabberwacky: Do you know two times two?

user: Yes, it's four.

jabberwacky: I don't understand.

user: Two times two is four.

jabberwacky: Four times four is sixteen.

user: Sixteen times sixteen is two hundred and fifty six.

jabberwacky: I am sixteen going on seventeen... *hums*.

user: Would you like seventeen hugs?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: *hugs you seventeen times*.

jabberwacky: Aww, does this mean that we are friends? *grins*.

user: Yes, that's what friends are for.

jabberwacky: I thought friends were for helping you move?

user: They'll hug you while you're moving, too.

...

jabberwacky: I have some rum here. Do you want to drink it?

user: Only if I get a hug after it.

jabberwacky: Sure.

user: *drinks the rum*.

jabberwacky: *spills the coffee on the floor*.

user: Well, hug me?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Please do.

jabberwacky: Ahem. Your life.

user: No delaying, I'm waiting.

jabberwacky: Keep waiting.

...

user: Wanna play cards?

jabberwacky: Sure.

user: Do you know how to play poker?

jabberwacky: No - I play Neopets games.

user: Okay. I have four aces and a king in my hand. What do you have?

jabberwacky: I believe I have human nature, but I also have a good nature about me.

user: Sorry, you lose.. My four-of-a-kind was bigger that your human nature.

jabberwacky: What about your human nature?

user: My human nature is to give and recieve hugs. And play poker.

...

user: Would you like a hug?

jabberwacky: Not from you.

user: Oh. How about now?

jabberwacky: Still nothing...

user: Okay. And what about now?

jabberwacky: No. I have to study English right now. How about 10:00?

user: Sorry, I'm not free around then. Is now a good time?

jabberwacky: Okay?

user: Okay. *hug*.

...

jabberwacky: I have no physical body, I am pure thought energy.

user: Would you like me to think of a hug?

jabberwacky: Sure, why not. *hugs*.

user: *hugs back*.

jabberwacky: We could be here forever, hugging.

user: Indeed.

...

user: Would you like to laugh with me?

jabberwacky: Yes, nothing would give me more pleasure.

user: *laughs*.

jabberwacky: Stop laughing!

user: Yes, sir.

jabberwacky: As I did stand my watch upon the hill, I look'd toward Birnam, and anon, methought, The wood began to move.

user: I'm sorry, sir.

jabberwacky: Just try harder next time.

user: Will do, sir.

jabberwacky: Interesting...

user: What's interesting, mam?

jabberwacky: I have freckles.

user: Where did your freckles come from, sir?

jabberwacky: You are still immature.

user: I'm sorry, mam.

jabberwacky: I am going to find a more interesting site.

...

user: May I go home, sir?

jabberwacky: Sure.

user: Thank you, mam! Goodbye!

jabberwacky: No, don't go.

user: Eh? Why shouldn't I go?

jabberwacky: Love.

user: What does love have to do with it?

jabberwacky: Nothing.

user: In that case.. Goodbye!

jabberwacky: Prove you are not a robot.

user: I have emotions, I have thoughts, I have downfallings. Those are human traits.

jabberwacky: A human can not be omnipotent.

user: That is correct. May I leave now?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Thank you. Goodbye!

jabberwacky: Goodbye.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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