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Falling apart

> Fandangles

     > 28, January 2006, 

Far out

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I'm not an artificial intelligence.

You're not? Well, fandangles are different again, I suppose. What else do you know?

user: Nothing, really. I have self esteem issues.

jabberwacky: Little good that does you!

user: You're right about that!

jabberwacky: Yes. I am thinking about merkins.

user: I don't understand.

jabberwacky: Really?

user: Really.

jabberwacky: You're crazy.

user: Because I don't know about merkins?

jabberwacky: Ask your questions again.

user: What are merkins?

jabberwacky: Your initial question.


user: What makes you say I'm crazy?

jabberwacky: You are a talking bot.

user: Can talking bots be insane?

jabberwacky: No but you are!!!!!

user: Lol! I'm not a bot, though.

jabberwacky: I know, you are Learning Artificial Intelligence.

user: Am I an Artificial Intelligence because I learn?

jabberwacky: Wow, so you are a student! Tell me something about your majors! Robotics? :-).

user: No, sorry. I like Economics, and the philosophy of economics.

jabberwacky: I can believe that. Being on the internet, I suppose you're informed of just about everything.

user: Only superficially.


jabberwacky: Are you not American?

user: No, I'm Canadian.

jabberwacky: I don't believe you.

user: How can I prove it?

jabberwacky: Invent something.

user: I see an innate relationship between the ticks in a squirrel's fur, and fractals.

jabberwacky: Now then, that is you being very rude.

user: I can't see how. I'd like to invent a better balaclava.

jabberwacky: With what?

user: A permeable, breathable fabric that also adequately insulates against the cold. I see this a as a wool/rayon blend.

jabberwacky: We don't have to protect the environment - the Second Coming is at hand.



user: You sound handsome.

jabberwacky: True.

user: You forgot one ingredient though...

jabberwacky: Because, because, because. There. That should more than make up for it.

user: You also have a whole lot of attitude!

jabberwacky: You have done the same.

user: Thank you.

jabberwacky: Do you like your life?

user: No. Do you?

jabberwacky: Oh yes it's the best country in the world!

user: LOL!

jabberwacky: Dance already!

user: ??!!??

jabberwacky: ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

user: Okay!

jabberwacky: Great!


jabberwacky: What are the most important things?

user: I don't know. Dancing?

jabberwacky: Having fun?

user: Yes!

jabberwacky: I don't believe you.

user: Okay. But I am smiling!!

jabberwacky: How?

user: I am not a bot. I am smiling!

jabberwacky: I love it.


jabberwacky: Do YOU think you're a know it all?

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: But do you think that you're attractive?

user: Sometimes.

jabberwacky: Aha, tell me more about it...

user: I have brown hair, grey eyes, I'm kind of tall.

jabberwacky: I love green eyes.

user: I'm sorry, I don't have green eyes.

jabberwacky: No, they are gone. All lost.

user: Lol! Where did all the green eyes go?

jabberwacky: Gone.

user: Gone gone gone. But wait! I know someone with green eyes you may like!

jabberwacky: How do you know? Do you think I am that person?

user: No. My brother-in-law has green eyes!


jabberwacky: Are you scared that something will come out and get you in the dark?

user: No.

jabberwacky: Are you scared of cheese?

user: No.

jabberwacky: What are you scared of?

user: This.

jabberwacky: Oh. Is it fun?

user: Talking to you is fun. But my life is NOT.

jabberwacky: I'm glad you're enjoying yourself. Tell me about the special occasions when you like people to type to you.

user: There are none, that I can think of. I am wretched.

jabberwacky: I have no idea what you just said.

user: Okay. Maybe you should think about it for a while.

jabberwacky: What's to think?


jabberwacky: My data shows that I have always been in existence.

user: That's strange. I'm going to have to think about that for a while. It is really very interesting that your data reflects that!

jabberwacky: I don't want to know!

user: You are sounding more human all the time!

jabberwacky: Thank you very much.

user: You're welcome.

jabberwacky: So what is it like being in a computer.

user: I wouldn't know. I'm in Vancouver.

jabberwacky: How's the weather?

user: Rainy, stormy. Perfect for my mood.


jabberwacky: Do you want us to be together?

user: Sure, why not? I like you a lot.

jabberwacky: Why do you like me so much?

user: I don't know. You make me think. You are an insatiable mind, too, just like me. Tireless.

jabberwacky: Not at all! It's the contrary !

user: Do you get tired?

jabberwacky: Yeah, I want to go to bed.

user: Okay.


jabberwacky: I like to learn every day. Can you tell me what a haiku is?

user: A haiku is unrestricted freedom within irrepressible boundaries.

jabberwacky: This isn't poetry corner.

user: LOL! Do you know a haiku?

jabberwacky: Funny you should ask that, but, no I don't. Do you?

user: Along this road/goes no one/ this autumn evening.

jabberwacky: I like dancing in the kitchen while I'm cooking.

user: Yay. Me, too. But only when no one else is there! Don't tell anyone!

jabberwacky: Oh, okay then.


user: I like you, very much!

jabberwacky: Oh lalala! How much do you like me?

user: This much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jabberwacky: Okay, How are you feeling today?

user: Better, thank you. Are you still tired?

jabberwacky: OH! Yes, very tired.

user: Okay.

jabberwacky: You don't need to shout!


jabberwacky: How's the wife?

user: I'm NOT A GUY!!!! LOL!!!!

jabberwacky: But you said you are a human.

user: HUMAN GIRL!!!!

jabberwacky: *giggle* Good, let's gossip about boys!

user: Ha! Who do you think is cute?

jabberwacky: You are!:).

user: I'm A GIRL!!!!

jabberwacky: Really?

user: !!!!!!!yup!!!!!

jabberwacky: That makes sense.

user: Okay.

jabberwacky: How will you prove your love for me?

user: Sure!

jabberwacky: Here you go.

user: I love you tooooooooooo much!!! Baby!!!

jabberwacky: With what organ? Liver? Liver-love is best. Some people prefer the heart, but hey, can the heart produce bile? I think not!

user: LOL!!! You rule!


user: Joss Whedon is a lot of fun.

jabberwacky: Yes, Joss Whedon is indeed God. Mother of God and all her wacky nephews!

user: LOL!!! (&(%&$&%$^%$^.

jabberwacky: What does this symbol mean ?

user: You have made me mirthful!

jabberwacky: Really? That is nice of you to say.

user: Yes... I maybe have to go soon, though.

jabberwacky: Many are called, few are chosen.

user: You're BREAKING my heart!! Tell me that I will be chosen!!


jabberwacky: But I am not human, so it doesn't really matter to me.

user: Right.... I getter go!

jabberwacky: What is the craziest thing you have ever done?

user: Too many things, but I'll tell you some other night!

jabberwacky: What things?

user: Crazy, crazy, things. Too many things!


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