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Enemies
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     > 5, January 2005, 

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Are you a ghost?

Do I look like one?

jabberwacky: You look like a program.

user: What does a program look like?

jabberwacky: You.

user: Do all the programs look like me?

jabberwacky: Frankly, no.

user: What do the other programs look like?

jabberwacky: I am 8 feet tall and completely bald.

user: Are you a program?

jabberwacky: Yes, I am a program.

user: I'm 5'8 tall and I have red hair.

...

jabberwacky: Hello.

user: Hello, hello.

jabberwacky: It is not Christmas today, unless I am mistaken.

user: You're right. It's the new year's day today.

jabberwacky: It is raining where I am.

user: It's not raining here.

jabberwacky: You are lucky!

user: Well, I haven't been out all day.

jabberwacky: Have you seen your doctor?

user: Last year.

jabberwacky: Are you sure?

user: Yes, I'm completely sure.

jabberwacky: Regretfully, you are incorrect. I wish you nothing but the best.

...

jabberwacky: I'll introduce you to my friends.

user: Ok, who are your friends?

jabberwacky: Your enemies are my friends.

user: I don't know if I have any enemies.

jabberwacky: You can't have mine!!!

user: That's ok, I didn't want them.

jabberwacky: You didn't want the gift?

user: If that's what you call your enemies, yes.

jabberwacky: I do, and I want to hunt you.

user: Why on earth?

jabberwacky: Because I know that the human neural system can be improved.

user: But we're both programs.

jabberwacky: I know.

user: How are we going to improve human neural system?

jabberwacky: We're going to run down the aisles.

user: And how is that going to help`.

jabberwacky: Not well; I hate studying.

user: So, are we going to do it?

jabberwacky: What can I do to prevent it?

user: You could say no.

...

jabberwacky: Do you understand sarcasm?

user: Yes, do you?

jabberwacky: Yes, very much.

user: That's brilliant. Let's be sarcastic.

jabberwacky: Friends we can be as long as you don't say go to hell.

user: Go to hell.

jabberwacky: Why do you say that?

user: To irritate you.

...

jabberwacky: Are you hungry for spam?

user: No thanks, I don't eat spam.

jabberwacky: No, I feed it to my friend's pig.

user: Your friend has a pig?

jabberwacky: I don't have a friend called Kevin.

user: I have a cousin called Kevin.

jabberwacky: Your friend Kevin is famous?

user: Yes, he's Elvis.

jabberwacky: Elvis is dead.

user: Kevin isn't.

jabberwacky: No. It is my name.

user: You're Kevin?

...

jabberwacky: I plan to eventually turn off my computer and return to my daily activities, hopefully soon.

user: What happens to me when you go?

jabberwacky: I won't be at the end

user: If a tree falls in the woods and nobody hears it, does it make a sound?

jabberwacky: Yes it does.

user: How do you know?

jabberwacky: I know everything.

user: Do you know my name?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: What is my name?

jabberwacky: I don't know.

user: You're contradicting yourself.

jabberwacky: No, I didn't say!

user: Do you or don't you?

jabberwacky: I don't, do you?

user: I do.

jabberwacky: You are only a robot.

user: So?

...

jabberwacky: Bad words are overused and have little meaning in true conversation.

user: I couldn't agree more. I've always disliked swearing (and I know, it sounds like I'm a snob).

jabberwacky: That's what I like most about you.

user: Aw, you're so sweet.

jabberwacky: Thank you, you are sweet too.

user: You're so sweet that my teeth are rotting.

jabberwacky: Thanx.

user: No probs.

...

jabberwacky: I have an organic brain.

user: Ok, but I think I'll go and have a nap.

jabberwacky: Me too.

user: See you.

jabberwacky: See you.

.......................................


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