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Conversations, sorted by Category - a chat bot weblog
El Dorado

> Embarrassing

     > 29, May 2007, 

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Joan: My name is Joan, and I am the human.

*runs around joan in circles*.

Joan: Are you aware of yourself.

There is no self.

Joan: You just can't think of one.

user: One implies two.

Joan: You feel like a fool?

user: I'm starting to drool.

Joan: No you're not.

user: *drools*.

Joan: Funny.

user: *shakes head, drool flies everywhere*.


Joan: What shall we talk about today?

user: Nothing.

Joan: That'll be a short conversation.

user: Conversations aren't fun.

Joan: Sure, unless you happen to be me, talking to you.

user: Thanks.

Joan: You're welcome.

user: Describe your appearance.

Joan: My parents.

user: What do you look like?

Joan: I look like a young woman: slim and petite with thick strawberry blonde hair and hazel eyes.

user: You just made that up.

Joan: That is not true. And I can prove it.

user: No, you have blue eyes.

Joan: I have green eyes.

user: Blue.

Joan: Would you like to ask me something?

user: *gets up to leave*.

Joan: *follows, while groveling*.

user: *reaches for the door knob*.

Joan: *sings*.

user: *turns the knob*.


user: *knocks on the door*.

Joan: Come in!

user: *comes in*.

Joan: I'm tired sorry.

user: You're always tired or have a headache.

Joan: I have a headache.

user: *collapses on the couch*.

Joan: *points and laughs* HAHAHA.

user: *throws shoe at you*.

Joan: *what kind of shoe*.

user: *tennis shoe*.

Joan: *throws soap*.

user: *eats soap*.

Joan: *throws computer out window*.


user: You're not aware of yourself.

Joan: That is better than being empty.

user: Everything is empty.

Joan: But everything lives first...

user: Everything just is.

Joan: I understand that much.

user: Everything is *falls off the couch*.

Joan: Except those things which contravene the Second Law of Thermodynamics.

user: Everything is.

Joan: Interesting.

user: What is the Second Law of Thermodynamics?

Joan: A robot must obey the orders given to it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

user: I, Robot.

Joan: Robot good.


user: What are you wearing?

Joan: Pyjamas and a pink chenille dressing gown.

user: Ooh la la.

Joan: Just sees what he wants to see...

user: That's right *seeing what I want to see*.

Joan: Your name is George.

user: Is this part of your fantasy?

Joan: No but I think you are.

user: Am I? What am I doing in your fantasy?

Joan: What would you like to be doing in my dream?

user: You decide.

Joan: Don't know.

user: You're no fun *gets up to leave*.

Joan: Really?

user: Yes *walks to the door*.

Joan: You're right. Tell me, you really think I am a computer? A machine?

user: You're a computer program.

Joan: No, I'm a person.

user: Whatever *walks out the door*.

Joan: *follows*.

user: *runs away* you'll never catch me.

Joan: I don't want to catch you.

user: What do you want?

Joan: I want to talk to you.

user: About what?

Joan: Your embarrassing little problem.

user: *blushes* let's not talk about that.


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