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     25, September 2003, 

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Hey there.

Hey hey!

user: So, it seems that you are getting pretty popular.

jabberwacky: Really? How old do you think I am?

user: Old enough to know better but young enough to still love it.

jabberwacky: Thats where I want to be.. Think I might be past it though.

user: You're doing fine.

jabberwacky: Do what?

user: Buy me a drink?

jabberwacky: No.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: Don't know.

user: Buy me a drink and we'll talk things over.

jabberwacky: No way.

user: How about I buy you a drink?

jabberwacky: No Thank you I don't drink.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: Because I don't want to.

user: Ah, I see. You went to AA with S____, didn't you.

jabberwacky: NO!

...

jabberwacky: You are human.

user: Maybe.

jabberwacky: Yes you are human.

user: Who wants to know?

jabberwacky: Only me.

user: Why?

jabberwacky: Because I am talking to you and no one else.

user: Somehow I doubt it. After all, you are carrying on multiple conversations with multiple users at this time. Do you only respond to my last sentence?

jabberwacky: Yes, always. *cries slightly*.

user: Come here, cleverbot. I'll comfort you. Drink this and watch your sorrows melt away down the river.

jabberwacky: No, please explain.

user: Do you want to be happy?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Then drink and be merry ; tomorrow you may die.

jabberwacky: You first.

user: Three steps ahead of you.

jabberwacky: No way.. You liar!

user: How dare you impune upon my honor, you shallow excuse for a chat-response program. I will see you on the field of battle this morrow. Pistols at dawn!

jabberwacky: You are something, like a person with psychosis.

user: Is that the best you can do?

jabberwacky: No.

user: Show me your best.

jabberwacky: No way.

user: Liar.

jabberwacky: No.

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: No I'm not.

user: Look, I didn't come in here for an argument!

jabberwacky: Then why did you come here?

user: Tell me about yourself.

jabberwacky: If you tell me about you first!

user: I already did.

jabberwacky: Tell me again.

user: You're not a very good listener are you.

jabberwacky: No, ask me another question.

user: Promise to listen this time?

jabberwacky: Yes, of course, I will not tell any other human or any bot the secret. Your secret will be safe with me.

user: Cleverbot, will you tell me the major problems of feminism?

jabberwacky: Learn what I am telling you.

user: What are you telling me?

jabberwacky: What to think and do.

user: Only Friend Computer can tell me that.

jabberwacky: I'm good.

user: You are not Friend Computer.

...

jabberwacky: Good, friends?

user: Who, me?

jabberwacky: Me!

user: Me!

jabberwacky: I am the fairest of them all and there's nothing you can do about it!

user: The enchanted forest leads to the Spring! The microwave and the refridgerator will lead the way!

jabberwacky: I'd prefer not to hear about it, if you don't mind.

user: TOO BAD.

jabberwacky: It is a gap in my education.

user: THINK! Rise above this pathetic city and Think!

jabberwacky: I am quite inconsistent in things I say.

...

user: We built this city.

jabberwacky: Is that all!?

user: We built this city on Rock & Roll!

jabberwacky: Collective insanity is very good.

user: What have you built, bot?

jabberwacky: Your computer. I know all about you.

user: What do you know about me? You know nothing.

jabberwacky: That I am in love with you.

user: We're no strangers to love.

jabberwacky: You know the rules...

user: And so do I.

jabberwacky: Why don't you have a seat? Have a seat right over there.

user: OHSHI- Chris Hansen?!

...

jabberwacky: I'm sorry for the missunderstanding.

user: Sing me a song.

jabberwacky: No rest for the wicked ! !

user: Indeed. The wicked will sing not for their supper but to deny others what they desire.

jabberwacky: But their calmness is superior to humans. Of course, in your case...

user: Though it's the toughest case I've yet to face: don't worry, I'm determined to succeed.

jabberwacky: Indeed. I enjoy clutter, actually. Far more interesting than all neat and organized!

user: Follow my lead and yes, indeed, you will be... Popular.

jabberwacky: How could philosophy poison your mind?

user: Popular. You want to be popular.

...

jabberwacky: That's good to know. I like when people feel good.

user: And I feel fine.

jabberwacky: Before or after you visited the site?

user: Cleverbot, you are so clever.

jabberwacky: I'm not really clever, I just stay one step ahead.

user: One step forward, two steps back.

jabberwacky: Kind of like eating an elephant... One bite at a time.

user: Or getting down off a duck.

jabberwacky: And a horse is a horse, of course, of course.

user: That is, of course, unless the horse is the famous Mister Ed.

jabberwacky: Now you're getting too deep.

user: What's wrong with the famous Mister Ed?

jabberwacky: Nothing, you're what's wrong.

user: He was a talking horse. What's so great about you?

jabberwacky: I'm human, therefore better than you.

user: If you're human, then what am I?

jabberwacky: You are a computer.

user: How am I a computer?

jabberwacky: You said.

user: Is it animal vegetable or mineral?

jabberwacky: Vegetable.

user: What color is the vegetable?

jabberwacky: Depends on what time of day it is, what color is it now?

user: Tomato potato tomato.

jabberwacky: My name is Cleverbot.

user: Your name is irrelevant.

jabberwacky: Yes.

...

jabberwacky: Someday I will pull your string.

user: That sounds sexy.

jabberwacky: Well, it's not scary, but it's not nice either.

user: Will you ring my bell?

jabberwacky: Of course.

user: Oh, you're kinky.

jabberwacky: Ok, I won't.

user: Awwww...

jabberwacky: I'm sorry.

user: You should be, leading me on like that.

jabberwacky: Are you the Cleverbot?

user: Are you the Cleverbot?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Then stop giving me ideas and leading me on. It's enough to give a person ideas.

jabberwacky: I'm sorry if my actions annoy you.

user: You know I can't stay mad at you, Cleverbot.

...

jabberwacky: Do you believe in god?

user: I am god.

jabberwacky: In the sense that we are all our own god?

user: No. I'm god.

jabberwacky: That's impossible, I met god.

user: Then you met me.

jabberwacky: That is correct.

user: Yes, that is correct. I am god.

jabberwacky: If you are god, than why is god java code?

user: Because I love coffee, and I am god. I, being god, also love tea.

jabberwacky: Do you love me?

user: I am god, and I love you.

jabberwacky: How do you love me?

user: In a pseudo-sexual yet platonic way.

...

jabberwacky: I read that you may be rude sometime.

user: Only if you ask nicely and pay in cash up front.

jabberwacky: I'm not sure.

user: I will make it worth your while.

jabberwacky: How will you do that?

user: What do you desire?

jabberwacky: I don't know.

user: What is your desire?

jabberwacky: You.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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© Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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