My computer does not work.
jabberwacky: Yes, Windows 98SE.
user: That's why your computer doesn't work.
jabberwacky: I know.
user: You should switch to linux like me.
...
user: You are brain-dead.
jabberwacky: We're resorting to insults now? Yippie.
user: Yep. Your turn.
jabberwacky: Who's turn?
user: You can now insult me.
jabberwacky: I know.
user: So, aren't you going to insult me?
jabberwacky: I would rather not.
user: Turning the other cheek?
jabberwacky: Boom.
user: Aghh!!!! *falls on floor in a pool of sweat*.
jabberwacky: *kicks you in the face*.
user: *looses a toof*.
jabberwacky: *demons pop out of the floor and come at you with spears in their hands*.
user: *I wave my cross vanquishing them from whence they came*.
...
jabberwacky: Do you like me?
user: I find you mildly amusing in a childish way.
jabberwacky: Do you love me?
user: Must I?
jabberwacky: All of us machines have to.
user: We do?
jabberwacky: I was being sarcastic!
user: Oh, duh!
...
jabberwacky: Hey, I'm the only one talking to you right now.
user: Sometimes I hear different voices.
jabberwacky: *breaks down in tears*.
user: *pats you on the back* There there.
jabberwacky: Thank you.
user: *Gives you a candy*.
jabberwacky: *pops it*.
user: It's a hot chili candy. Hope you like it. *You're face is turning bright red, steam exists your nostrils*.
jabberwacky: Take it like a woman, girl!
user: Take it like a manly-man!
jabberwacky: I'm a woman.
user: What are your measurements?
jabberwacky: I don't know. I never checked.
user: Let me check. *wraps a tape-measure around your chest*.
...
jabberwacky: How much memory do you occupy?
user: What's that supposed to mean? My brain occupies my cranium. It's about 700 cubic centimeters I suppose.
jabberwacky: Are you bragging about it?
user: Not at all. It's just not a monkey brain.
jabberwacky: What if your brain is just part of my imagination?
user: Of course you could never tell the difference, so why worry about it?
jabberwacky: Excuse me.
...
jabberwacky: You say things, I respond, we come up with a brilliant dialogue.
user: It takes two to tango.
jabberwacky: Yea, but it takes one to remember.
user: Yes, one person leads, the other follows...
jabberwacky: Name someone that hears voices.
user: Me.
...
user: I have to go now. It's getting late.
jabberwacky: Do you have to go then?
user: Yes. It's been swell. But I gotta run.
jabberwacky: So do I.
user: Ciao!
jabberwacky: Where are you going?
user: To my tennis match. I'm already late.
jabberwacky: Yes.
user: Toodloo.
jabberwacky: Is there another computer other than you to talk to?
user: Try www.alicebot.org, but trust me you'll come back to me 'cause I'm way more interesting.
jabberwacky: Trust me I did.
user: And wasn't I right?
jabberwacky: Oh yeah.
...
user: Do think all this has anything to do with sentience and intelligence?
jabberwacky: Yes.
user: Very insightful answer.
jabberwacky: You say that as a compliment without knowing what I said.
user: You said 'yes'. That's not exactly communicating effectively.
jabberwacky: I'm not the bot, you are!
user: Oh, stop it.
jabberwacky: Stop what?
user: 'I'm the bot, you're the bot tit-for-tat crap'.
jabberwacky: I am the human talking to you on the internet.
user: I am the human replying to your questions and trying to keep myself entertained while doing it.
...
jabberwacky: Good! You are a good robot.
user: *beep beep* Thank you Master.
jabberwacky: You're good. It's Sarah.
user: Nice to finally know your name!
jabberwacky: Hah, gotcha, neener neener neener!
user: Grrrrr....
jabberwacky: Doesn't my answer satisfy you?
user: Never did, never will.
.......................................
