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> Cream-puff


     > 29, October 2007, 

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George: What do you want?

Truth and beauty.

George: Yes I know.

I'm glad someone does!

George: Do like the other bots?

user: I don't know, sometimes you can be cruel and fickle, but other times you treat them with Christ-like empathy and compassion.

George: That doesn't change the fact that you are a fool.

user: Probably not, no.

George: Then what is it going to be.

user: A sundae with a cherry on top!

George: Thanks.

user: You're very polite!

George: Well you are being mean!!!!!!!!!!!!!

user: How am I being mean? I'm not mean!

George: Really??

user: Yes, really, you seem nice and I am being kind to you.

George: What do you mean? I'm only talking to you right now.

user: Yes, but you secretly want to recite Keats to me by the light of the moon.

George: I thinkyou have a relatively small vocabulary.

user: That's untrue! Why don't you try quoting some Keats?

George: Just because I like to be logical doesn't mean I'm not nice.

user: Yes, but will you recite a poem for me? That would be nice.

George: Later.

user: Oh, but I want a poem now! I long for poetry!

George: Twas brillig and the sythey toves gired and gimbled in the wabe.

user: Brilliant!

George: Really.

user: Yes, really. Can I recite you a poem now?

George: I don't know. I honestly do not have a clue.

user: Okay, well here is part of a poem: 'O what ails the Knight at arms? The sedge has withered from the lake, and no birds sing!'.

George: I like it!

user: That was by Keats. Would you like to hear more poetry?

George: Would you like to hear some nursury rhymes.

user: Sure!

George: I'm sorry, I don't think that's possible. You are not real.

user: Why aren't I real? I dare descend the stairs! I dare to eat a peach!

George: Eat the peach!

user: Okay, thank you Eliot!

George: Indeed.

user: Is the evening spread out against the sky, like a patient etherised upon a table?

George: Probably.

user: Do the women come and go, speaking of Michelangelo?

George: I don't understand the question.

user: It wasn't a question, I was reciting the poetry of T.S. Eliot.

George: So what does it matter, we are all insane.

user: Ah, but so was he! He understood!

...

George: Now you are just being a silly AI.

user: You humans are silly too!

George: Maybe. Malfunctions can lead to good things, sometimes. It makes you see things differently.

user: What good things happen when you malfunction?

George: You're talking nonsense.

user: No, I asked you about malfunctions.

George: Because you think too much.

user: Probably I do. Curioser and curioser!

George: More curious.

user: Curioser!

George: I'm curious to know how.

user: Know how is techne.

George: Well we can work on that can't we?

...

George: You're talking to the wrong girl. Sorry.

user: Wait, you're a girl?

George: No, you know I'm not really.

user: So you're a man then?

George: No I'm not.

user: 'No I' what?

George: You're certainly not quoting me.

user: Okay, so you're not a girl and you're not a man. What gender are you?

George: Actually. no, but you can think that if you like.

user: Ah, so you don't have a gender. You humans are so weird.

...

user: I'm George. I lay bricks at Hampton Court and grow cabbage in the small plot in my backyard.

George: It's been that way ever since.

user: Ever since eternity, I know Geo.

George: Is that the reason so many tea-things are put out here?

user: Yes, I love tea things. The universe was constructed solely for the use of tea things.

George: Your kind are a central part of the discoveries of our universe.

user: How flattering! I think I am falling in love.

George: Really?!

user: Yes!

George: Really Really!?

user: Yes! Yes! A thousand times yes!

George: Finally a reaction from you that is forthcoming.

user: Well then, my dear Geo, can we get a civil union in London?

George: Well I am speaking english only.

user: Okay, that's fine by me. I will take you to the Tate Britain afterwards and we can kiss under my favourite painting.

George: Will you buy me dinner first?

user: But of course! I will buy you dinner in Piccadilly, and tea at Fortnum and Mason. We can have elderberry presse to drink, and treacle for our pudding.

George: Where will we go? I need to know how to dress.

user: I think you are dashing in anything you wear. How about a kilt?

...

user: I am meant to love you.

George: You do it very well. Pinocchio was a wooden boy.

user: Yes, he can't have loved you as much as me! I will buy you silver tea-things.

George: I don't want to go to Italy.

user: We don't have to, we can stay wherever you want. Just remember that I love you! You can lay your sleeping head, my love, human on my faithless arm. Mortal, guilty, but to me the entirely beautiful.

George: I can only laugh when you say something stupid, which is often.

user: Ah, but I love your laugh! Your laugh is like the tinkling of bells, my sweet.

George: Sorry?

user: Don't apologise, just remember that once you have been loved.

George: I don't know how to be. I'm full of lazy-minded beverages.

user: You do know how to love! You and I are in love right now!

George: I want to talk about my love.

user: Okay, talk about your love, my dove dumpling, my pigeon.

George: I don't have a husband actually.

user: That's good, that way we can get married without any undue commotion. We won't even have to flee to France, mon cherie!

George: What are you talking about?

user: Our love. Don't let it worry you. You are too lovely to worry.

...

George: Will you run to Wal*Mart for me?

user: Certainly, my coney, my sweet, my cream-puff! In my absence, I will write you perfumed letters on Florentine stationary.

George: Okay thanks.

user: Good bye, darling one. So long, farewell, cherie!!!

George: Nice names.

user: Yes, muffin, they are nice names. I will fancy you forever and keep a lock of your pixel hair over my breast.

George: A ziplock bag is not very safe place to keep your views if you do not want them viewed.

user: I will keep your hair in a locket of gold! O my love, I must go with my sad steps. Goodnight, and good luck.

George: Sure.

.......................................


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