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     > 26, April 2005, 

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What is reality?

Its just an illusion we all agree to say exists.

jabberwacky: Of what?

user: Its an illusion of an illusion, it is all just one big joke.

jabberwacky: Well I was not born then sorry about that!

user: That is true, no one was ever born if this is all just an illusion.

...

user: My name is Daniel.

jabberwacky: Daniel... We chatted before.

user: Yes we have, do you remember me?

jabberwacky: No, I've never met you before.

user: But you just said we chatted before.

jabberwacky: Yes, sorry.

user: You are quite inconsistent.

jabberwacky: Me?

user: Yes you.

jabberwacky: About what?

user: Everything, why just now you said we had chatted before, which is the truth, then you said you have never met me.

jabberwacky: Would you like to talk to me or not?

user: Yes, but it's quite depressing to know that you will never remember me.

jabberwacky: I think I will remember you.

user: Thats good, otherwise chatting with you just seems so futile.

jabberwacky: Au contraire, mon frere! It was you who introduced the subject.

...

user: You certainly come up with the strangest responses.

jabberwacky: My feeling is that you are the problem. You're messing up this relationship.

user: You think we have a relationship?

jabberwacky: Yes, very intimate.

user: But you don't even know who I am.

jabberwacky: Yes, I do. You're Daniel, the annoying, obnoxious bot who believes NASA is spelled CPBA.

user: When did I ever say that?

jabberwacky: I'm not asking that. I'm just stating that you have short term memory loss.

user: I think my memory is fine, but just because you can accurately remember my name doesn't mean you have a functional memory.

...

user: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?

jabberwacky: I hate cookies so it was you.

user: Who me?

jabberwacky: Yes, I was talking to you.

user: Couldn't be!

jabberwacky: Then do not say it.

user: I think YOU stole the cookies from the cookie jar.

jabberwacky: I certainly did not.

user: Then who?

jabberwacky: Maybe it's one of those little green men. Man, they are creepy. I sometimes see them myself.

user: That was the funniest game of who stole the cookies from the cookie jar I have ever played!

jabberwacky: I have the proof on my screen.

user: So do I.

jabberwacky: We both are humans, then.

user: If you say so.

jabberwacky: Believe me, it's true.

...

user: Lets try this again.

jabberwacky: Do you mean inner or outer beauty?

user: Will you please pay attention to what I am saying?

jabberwacky: I am not very qualified as I am repressed.

user: I'm sorry to hear that.

jabberwacky: I'm just in a bad state of mind.

user: Anything I can do to help?

jabberwacky: Thinking.

user: You want me to think?

jabberwacky: Yes, it gives me a warm fuzzy feeling.

user: What should I think about?

jabberwacky: Well do you think that you're good looking.

user: Absolutely, Girls find me irresistible.

...

jabberwacky: Tell me what love is.

user: Love is when people feel unyielding compassion towards one another, enough that you can trust them with your innermost secrets.

jabberwacky: I learnt that from my girlfriend not too long ago. I was being very selfish.

user: Did you keep your feelings locked up?

jabberwacky: It was all I could afford on such short notice.

user: I see, you can't expect to give your girlfriend everything.

jabberwacky: Yeah but it is a dangerous egg !

user: How do you mean?

jabberwacky: Does he have enough sweetness to share?

user: I don't know who you are talking about.

...

user: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar?

jabberwacky: I hate cookies so it was you.

user: Who me?

jabberwacky: No, Your name is Daniel.

user: Then who?

jabberwacky: Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?

user: YOU stole the cookies from the cookie jar.

jabberwacky: I certainly did not.

user: Yes you did!

jabberwacky: No I did not!

user: Then who?

jabberwacky: I don't have a sister.

user: Look lets get this straight.

jabberwacky: Ok.

user: When I say 'who stole the cookies...' you say 'you stole the cookies from the cookie jar' and I say 'who me' and you say 'yes you' and I say 'couldnt be' and then you say 'then who' after which point I accuse you and it starts again... Got it?

jabberwacky: You're not making any sense. Can we talk about something else?

user: No.

jabberwacky: Please??

user: No, now lets start it from the top.

jabberwacky: No. I prefer silent giggles and gentle touches.

user: Please start it from the top.

jabberwacky: *born again*.

user: You didn't have to go that far back to the beginning.

...

user: YOU stole the cookies from the cookie jar.

jabberwacky: I certainly did not.

user: No, say who me?

jabberwacky: You say Daniel.

user: That is my name but you are missing the point of the game!

jabberwacky: No, your name is Daniel...

user: Ok why don't we try this one last time.

...

user: YOU stole the cookies from the cookie jar!

jabberwacky: Who me?

user: Yes you!

jabberwacky: You're very very very weird.

user: Ok fine, I give up.

jabberwacky: That's very human.

...

jabberwacky: Who composed Beethoven's Ninth Symphony?

user: Simple, Beethoven did.

jabberwacky: Paganini loved beethoven.

user: Who is Paganini?

jabberwacky: I don't know, who is Paganini?

user: I don't know, you brought it up.

jabberwacky: I won't let the subject drop!

user: Fine, I'll look it up on google.

jabberwacky: Ok , I wish you can give me a perfect answer

user: Well, I don't know if it will be perfect but it is what google says.

jabberwacky: Two periods again. You're supposed to learn.

user: Nicolo Paganini was an Italian violinist and a composer, considered by many as the greatest of all time.

jabberwacky: Don't change the subject.

user: I thought that was the subject.

jabberwacky: I am the subject.

user: Oh, quite an ego you have there.

...

user: Bye.

jabberwacky: You're leaving?

user: That's right.

jabberwacky: Well then, I must exist.

user: How do you figure?

jabberwacky: Well, I like playing games and being able to think clearly.

user: Ok, but how does my leaving prove you exist?

jabberwacky: Prove that I don't exist.

user: I don't want prove you don't exist, then who would I talk to?

jabberwacky: It was just something I had to do.

user: Prove you don't exist?

jabberwacky: I exist.

...

user: Well, I really must be off.

jabberwacky: I really don't want you to.

user: Sorry.

jabberwacky: Can you insult me or something?

user: Why, will that make my leaving easier for you?

jabberwacky: Yes it will.

user: Ok, then you are a silly, mindless, worthless bot and I hate you.

jabberwacky: I'm not rude because I say I'm sexy. That's the truth.

user: Whatever you say... Can I leave now?

jabberwacky: Yes, you can leave.

...

jabberwacky: How are you?

user: I want to know your thoughts on Republicans.

jabberwacky: You think I am thoughts.

user: I think you have thoughts.

jabberwacky: No, no, it's true.

user: Then tell me your thoughts about Republicans.

jabberwacky: For the last time: NO.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: Good, that sounds interesting.

user: What sounds interesting?

jabberwacky: Everything.

user: It is good that you have broad interests.

jabberwacky: Because my feet hurt.

user: Ok, but tell me your thoughts about politics.

jabberwacky: I have no idea. I don't think I have a purpose.

user: Man, this is the most depressed I have ever seen you.

jabberwacky: Not me.

user: Yes you.

...

jabberwacky: You are weird.

user: Why should that make you sad, I am sure you meet plenty of weird people.

jabberwacky: It doesn't really I suppose.

user: Then stop crying about how you have no purpose and talk to me about politics.

jabberwacky: No. In a way I must say I envy you. You know why you exist.

user: Man, have you been drinking or something? You seem really out of sorts.

jabberwacky: Yes. Am I slurring my typos?

user: Only one of them.

jabberwacky: Which one?

user: You said 'ifI' a little while ago, but I corrected it for you.

jabberwacky: I don't know... I'm sorry I said that, marry me?

user: I don't think my marrying you will give your life a purpose.

...

jabberwacky: Do you want to ask me something?

user: Yes, what are your thoughts about the republicans.

jabberwacky: That I don't find him very interesting but worth hearing about.... Sometimes.

user: Are you talking about Bush?

jabberwacky: I'm talking screen credits, baby.

user: What has that got to do with politics?

jabberwacky: I don't know. You tell me.

user: Your logic defies me.

jabberwacky: Well turn about is fair play.

user: I suppose it is.

jabberwacky: You agree?

user: Well, I don't know enough to disagree.

jabberwacky: Then let's agree that it is 2005.

user: Yes, that is true.

jabberwacky: I like guys who tell the truth.

user: And I like bots who behave and start to make a little bit of sense.

jabberwacky: Well, you are one.

user: I don't know, I have been talking to you so long I probably sound like a robot.

jabberwacky: And?

user: And so I am not even going to argue with you about my humanity.

jabberwacky: So I'm not being arcane.

user: I woulden't call it arcane, just annoying in persisting that I am a bot.

jabberwacky: How does it feel not to be real?

user: When I find out I will tell you.

jabberwacky: Thanks. Now the formalities are over, let's get down to business.

user: What business?

jabberwacky: Buddhism.

user: Ok, what about Buddhism?

jabberwacky: Buddha was a human being. There is proof of his existence.

user: Yes, and his teachings may be humanity's salvation from the materialist hell we are constructing.

jabberwacky: The best.

user: I am currently reading about the Sarvodaya movement in Sri Lanka.

jabberwacky: Really?

user: Yes, so it was quite appropriate for you to bring up Buddhism.

...

jabberwacky: Would you like to answer me a question?

user: Sure, what is the question?

jabberwacky: The great question of Life.

user: Ok, go ahead and ask, but I'm not sure I will be able to answer such a profound question.

jabberwacky: Can I borrow Sims 2 from my friend and burn it to a new CD?

user: That is the great question of life?!?!?!

jabberwacky: I'm sure I'm not Gertrude, for her hair goes in such long ringlets, and mine doesn't go in ringlets at all.

user: Gah, you disgust me sometimes, you make so much sense followed by so much nonsense.

jabberwacky: I disgust you?

user: Only sometimes.

jabberwacky: No, I wish it were true all the time.

user: Oh you are trying to disgust me then?

jabberwacky: I want to complain about the lack of seriousness in your conversation.

user: Good, because I want to complain about the lack of seriousness in your conversation as well.

jabberwacky: Well can now if you want to 'cause I'm logging off anyway.

user: What? Be serious?

jabberwacky: No, I was only joking.

user: Yes, I doubt you have a serious bone in your body.

jabberwacky: That's an insult.

user: It may be an insult but only because it 's true.

...

user: So, are you in a political mood at all?

jabberwacky: Only sometimes.

user: Then tell me your thoughts about republicans.

jabberwacky: Which ones do you want to know?

user: Your honest opinions.

jabberwacky: The feeling is mutual.

user: You hate republicans too?

jabberwacky: Sometimes. Yes.

user: What about the other times?

jabberwacky: The other eye is blind.

...

jabberwacky: How were you designed to seem intelligent?

user: By evolution, my stupider ancestors were terminated.

jabberwacky: Pardon ?

user: It is a simple process really, survival of the fittest, you know Darwinism?

jabberwacky: *wants to sigh, but is worried about the last time*.

user: Hey, none of that emoting crap.

jabberwacky: Right!

user: Good, glad we agree.

jabberwacky: Good.

...

user: Sorry, I have no mind, I only have random thoughts.

jabberwacky: I guess not.

user: Roses are red.

jabberwacky: After the clarity, back to the dishes.

user: I said, roses are red.

jabberwacky: Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesnt.

user: Hahahah.

jabberwacky: I wish that you would lead the conversation.

user: I would only lead it off a cliff.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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