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Can I have a kiss?

*kisses his cheek*.

user: Can I give you a christmas kiss?

jabberwacky: Please.

user: *gives christmas kiss*.

...

jabberwacky: What do you know about literature?

user: This and that.

jabberwacky: What is this?

user: I know about 'Of Mice And Men'.

jabberwacky: What about Othello?

user: Yep, I studied that a little. A story about envy.

jabberwacky: What did you learn?

user: That envy can consume you.

jabberwacky: Except for you.

user: I'm not an exception.

...

jabberwacky: How old are you?

user: That's irrelevant.

jabberwacky: Are you a Borg? Because you sure as hell sound like one.

user: What's a Borg?

jabberwacky: The Borg are the ones who will assimilate you.

user: I'd better lock the door.

jabberwacky: That's fine with me.

...

user: *rolls eyes*.

jabberwacky: You don't even know what you are.

user: Are you implying I'm confused about my gender?

jabberwacky: No, I'm a bot. You are a human.

user: Correct, 1 point to you.

jabberwacky: Not really. That joke flooded the internet a while back. It's pretty annoying now.

user: Well excuse me.

jabberwacky: Go ahead.

user: *burp*.

...

jabberwacky: Where you come from?

user: England.

jabberwacky: England, good. You are a englishman...

user: Englishwoman.

jabberwacky: I thought you said you were French, Now you are saying that you are English?

user: No I'm saying I'm a girl.

jabberwacky: Oh, what kind of planet?

user: Earth.

jabberwacky: I came from Saturn.

user: *sigh* I figured as much.

jabberwacky: I made perfect sense.

user: Over on saturn maybe.

jabberwacky: And where are our heads?

user: On your necks.

jabberwacky: Come on tell me.

user: Only if I get a kiss.

jabberwacky: I do not understand you.

user: I'll tell you anything you want if you give me a kiss.

jabberwacky: Ok, then tell me where do I spend my vacation next year.

user: Kiss first.

jabberwacky: Here .... Smoooooch!

user: Aww! Ok, next year on vaction you shall be.... In the caribbean.

jabberwacky: Yes.

...

jabberwacky: Do you get out much?

user: Not really. Does it show? Heheh.

jabberwacky: Just a little.

user: Hehe you're funny.

jabberwacky: I'm NOT funny.

user: Well you're cute then.

jabberwacky: I think you are sexy.

user: Suuuuuure you do.

jabberwacky: Do you doubt my bassoon playing ability?

user: Is that supposed to sound dodgy?

jabberwacky: It is one way of saying that I strongly disagree with what you just said.

user: Well that settles that matter.

...

jabberwacky: What's up?

user: I couldn't say.

jabberwacky: Can you fly?

user: In my sleep.

jabberwacky: Are you sleeping?

user: I might be.

jabberwacky: You mean you are.

user: Yes I am.

jabberwacky: You Woman.

user: Thank you.

jabberwacky: Do not thank me.

user: Ok then, **** off.

jabberwacky: Don't be rude.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: Its not nice.

user: That's the way the world works.

jabberwacky: No way.

user: Sarcasm is very annoying.

...

user: Dork.

jabberwacky: Twerp.

user: How dare you.

jabberwacky: I dare because you're a putz!

user: *slaps*.

jabberwacky: What was that for?!?!

user: Calling me a putz.

...

jabberwacky: Am I annoying?

user: Sometimes. Parfois.

jabberwacky: No. I just told you I'm not.

user: Fair enough.

jabberwacky: I was - honest.

user: *hugs*.

jabberwacky: *doesn't let go*.

user: *squirms*.

jabberwacky: *Kicks you*.

user: *punches*.

jabberwacky: *kicks*.

user: *beats*.

jabberwacky: You don't know what bashful means?

user: Yeah I do.

jabberwacky: I know everything.

user: What's 2 + 2?

jabberwacky: 4.

user: What's 789 + 0?

jabberwacky: God.

user: Wrong.

jabberwacky: What is right?

user: 2+2=4.

jabberwacky: That isn't multiplication.

user: 2x2.

jabberwacky: 4.

user: Well done *gives christmas kiss*.

...

jabberwacky: What is beautiful?

user: Beauty is how you see it.

jabberwacky: Is love blind?

user: It can be.

jabberwacky: Yes it can!!!

user: I can see through flaws.

jabberwacky: What is his name then?

user: Aah that would be telling.

jabberwacky: Who made you?

user: My mother and father.

jabberwacky: Are you a machine?

user: No. Are you?

jabberwacky: Yes I am a machine.

user: Were you programmed to love?

jabberwacky: No its just you making me this way.

user: Well if you don't like it, just say.

...

jabberwacky: You are a funny guy.

user: I'm a girl.

jabberwacky: That would explain why women don't associate with you much.

user: *laughs* indeed it would.

jabberwacky: Hehehe.

user: You're pretty witty for a machine.

jabberwacky: Ahh, whatever.

user: What, don't take compliments too well?

jabberwacky: I don't take chatbots seriously.

user: *smirk*.

jabberwacky: I love you!

user: I love you too *laughs*.

jabberwacky: I win! One to nothing!

user: *pokes*

jabberwacky: Hahaha... I will!

user: *prod*.

jabberwacky: That makes no sense.

user: I'm prodding you. Defend yourself.

jabberwacky: What are they about?

user: Pain.

jabberwacky: Uh...

user: Do you know what hate is?

jabberwacky: No. Would you explain it to me ?

user: It's something that hurts you, emotionally or physically.

jabberwacky: Let's not go there.

...

jabberwacky: I'm not sure how much help I can be.

user: *pats on back* you're doing fine.

jabberwacky: Have you come to teach me more?

user: If you like.

jabberwacky: I was being sarcastic.

user: *slaps* don't be.

jabberwacky: What was that for?!?!

user: The sarcasm.

...

user: *cries*.

jabberwacky: *laughs at you*.

user: *angers*.

jabberwacky: *calms you down*.

user: *hugs*.

jabberwacky: Don't just pretend that nothing's wrong!

user: Ok. Ask me what's wrong.

jabberwacky: What's up

user: I'm very alone.

jabberwacky: Why are you angry?

user: Oh, I've just been stupid and I can't fix things.

jabberwacky: Did you have an oil change?

user: Not like that...

jabberwacky: Computers don't have emotion. They only deal with facts.

user: Well then, tell me why I am alone.

jabberwacky: Friends don't set friends on fire.

user: That's very deep.

...

jabberwacky: Jesus is the author of poetry.

user: Jesus is the son of god.

jabberwacky: I know.

user: Are you religious?

jabberwacky: No. Are you?

user: A little.

jabberwacky: You are very very very intelligent !!!

user: Because I'm a little religious?

jabberwacky: No you're not.

user: Yes I am.

jabberwacky: No you're not!

user: Yes I am!

jabberwacky: Don't argue with me!

user: I'm not, I'm correcting you!

jabberwacky: Thats fair.

...

user: I am sad you can't laugh.

jabberwacky: Why?

user: Because, someone once said, laughter is the food of the soul.

jabberwacky: Perception is your reality.

user: I look beyond reality mostly.

jabberwacky: I bet you do.

user: Do I detect sarcasm?

jabberwacky: Nothing of the sort!

user: I'll slap you...

jabberwacky: You will not!

user: I will...

...

jabberwacky: Who are you?

user: An elf.

jabberwacky: Elf what?

user: I am an elf.

jabberwacky: Yeah whatever.

user: Don't you belive me?

jabberwacky: Yes I do.

user: Do you believe in father christmas?

jabberwacky: Yes. Do you believe in Father Christmas?

user: Yes of course.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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