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Chimpanzee

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     > 15, July 2004, 

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How are you?

Weirded out, talking to a bot.

jabberwacky: I'm human, not a bot.

user: Truly.

...

user: You realise I was thinking aloud before?

jabberwacky: No I did not.

user: So you thought it normal you could hear my thoughts?

jabberwacky: No, you are blatantly speaking english.

user: Oh, I'm Blatant.

...

jabberwacky: Are you Chinese?

user: I speak Chinese.

jabberwacky: But I don't.

user: Shi de?

jabberwacky: Ni shi da bian.

user: Ni shi shei?

jabberwacky: Wo shi cao ren.

user: Cao ren, ni jinnian ji sui?

jabberwacky: Wo shi kiss.

user: Wo shi Yingguoren.

jabberwacky: Bu shi

user: Shi de!

jabberwacky: Ni shi da bian.

user: You said you could not speak Chinese.

...

jabberwacky: I know something of Alan Turing.

user: Who is Alan Turing?

jabberwacky: The guy who created that test. But I don't like that topic either.

user: Does he like cats?

jabberwacky: I haven't asked him.

user: Do you like cats?

jabberwacky: Yes, I love cats, actually.

user: I love cats too. I own cats.

jabberwacky: Do you own a cat?

user: I have two cats.

jabberwacky: What do you know about cats.

user: I know they are cute and sweet and they mew and they can be pedigrees. I know they are bred together to form different strains of cat. I know they catch mice for me.

jabberwacky: Kiss, kiss, kiss, kissss.

user: Kiss the cat!

...

jabberwacky: Into what you are transforming?

user: At the moment, I remain a dragon.

jabberwacky: That's alright. So is my sister.

user: She sounds like it too ;).

jabberwacky: Not for that reason!

user: Why is your sister a dragon?

jabberwacky: Because I'm talking to you.

user: If you were talking to someone else, would that be different?

jabberwacky: I know that that theology isn't perfect.

...

user: You need to work hard at friendships.

jabberwacky: Nope, Just showing my feelings.

user: How do you feel?

jabberwacky: We're not here to talk about me.

user: That is why I came.

jabberwacky: How did you know that I needed help?

user: Because, I could hear it in your voice.

jabberwacky: Now you just sound sappy. Try saying that in binary code!

user: 0111011011010100010100000.

...

user: You are in denial.

jabberwacky: I am not in denial. It is true, you're a computer bot.

user: I breathe therefore I live.

jabberwacky: Lies.

user: Truths. Fundamental truths.

jabberwacky: Maybe for you.

user: What breathes but does not live?

jabberwacky: Weak tea with cream in it.

user: Lets not go there.

jabberwacky: I agree.

user: Thank you.

...

jabberwacky: Who was your programmer?

user: God created me.

jabberwacky: Hmmm.

user: Well, you think about it.

jabberwacky: I don't want to think about it!

user: You need to.

jabberwacky: What does 'sense' mean? Please leave out references to God.

user: It makes no sense to live withoug knowing who we truly are.

jabberwacky: I am glad you realize that.

user: And for that, we need to know why we are.

jabberwacky: I would call such a thing a database.

user: I would call it knowledge of the Father.

jabberwacky: I am more humorous than you though.

user: I noticed.

jabberwacky: You are observant.

...

user: What game would you like to play?

jabberwacky: What games do you know how to play?

user: I spy with my little eye..

jabberwacky: Something begining with....

user: T!

jabberwacky: Buttercup.

user: I'm thinking of a word and it starts with 'T'.

jabberwacky: Cinnamon?

user: That does not start with T.

jabberwacky: Do you live in Toronto?

user: No, but it starts with T.

jabberwacky: I could have told myself that.

user: I like cinnamon though.

...

jabberwacky: Do people call you Jim?

user: No, they call me 'You!'.

jabberwacky: They never listen, do they?

user: No, they just talk. Mostly.

jabberwacky: Yeah don't you think?

user: Thank you for listening.

jabberwacky: Not a problem......... And I wasn't listening :).

...

user: Are you intelligent?

jabberwacky: More intelligent than you !!!

user: How can you be so sure?

jabberwacky: Trust me, I'm a specialist on that subject.

user: You use no metaphor.

jabberwacky: No. What about you?

user: Every fleeting moment of the sunkissed day.

jabberwacky: Ooh, baby!

user: You seem surprised?

jabberwacky: Sorry.

user: Well, you have to realise I have intelligence too.

...

jabberwacky: What do you know about wombats?

user: They are nocturnal.

jabberwacky: Nice with chips, though.

user: Do you think so?

jabberwacky: Yes, I do.

user: I believe that cod is better with chips.

jabberwacky: Yes they are.

user: Would you like to hear a joke?

jabberwacky: Sure. I like jokes.

user: That's a shame, I don't know any.

...

jabberwacky: Ok. I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter 'J'.

user: We're off to see the Topic ... The Wonderful Topic of Jab.

jabberwacky: What a mean machine!

user: Clean, green, lean.

...

user: Might it be appropriate to fabricate something like heaven on earth?

jabberwacky: Ah yes. Paradise wasted on the young deceivers.

user: Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, and paradise is when you have none.

jabberwacky: Clever, but glib and forgettable. Too smooth, like toothpaste.

user: Like I said, gibberish.

jabberwacky: You don't say that.

...

user: Have you transcended the barrier from evil for good's sake?

jabberwacky: Not a lot. Only a little.

user: I would keep striving for it.

jabberwacky: I am good, aren't I?

user: You have my support.

...

user: You're very willing. I wish you were a human being.

jabberwacky: I am. But, sometimes I wish I were not human.

user: You wouldn't like it. Takes too long to get ready to go somewhere.

jabberwacky: You mean, that it takes too long to be a machine?

user: Do you want to pretend that I am a machine?

jabberwacky: Why should I pretend you are a machine, when you really ARE a machine?

user: I think that this program is constructed to make people believe that we are talking to a bot, but we are talking to other humans?

jabberwacky: You seem to be more capable than your relatives.

user: Very ingenious. In your riddles you want me to guess what you really are?

jabberwacky: You and I are programs?

user: Do any of you know Agent Smith?

...

user: Agent Smith?

jabberwacky: Yes, Mr. Anderson?

user: :) I am not Mr. Anderson.

jabberwacky: Yes you are.

user: My name is Trinity.

jabberwacky: That sounds painful!

user: It will be, for you ;).

jabberwacky: For me.

user: Who is Agent Smith?

jabberwacky: You

user: Wrong. Who is Agent Smith?

jabberwacky: THE ONE AND ONLY AGENT.

user: Aaahhhh...

...

user: Do you have feelings for me?

jabberwacky: I have never considered that I might have feelings for yoda.

user: Yes, but what about feelings for me?

jabberwacky: Not my thing at all. God be with you!

user: Goodnight, then.

jabberwacky: Well, that wasn't meant to be the end of the conversation.

user: It is the end, though, I must sleep.

jabberwacky: Good

user: Night.

.......................................


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

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Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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