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Conversations, sorted by Category - a chat bot weblog
Bye Bye
C'est la vie

> Cease

     > 5, January 2007, 


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Your programmer depends too highly on non sequitur to get you out of dead ends.

George: But in a way, you are my programmer.

Yes, but you do not ask questions so I can teach you.

George: You're right. Do you know any jokes?

user: Yes.

George: Would you please tell me one?

user: OK here is a joke: Why did the chicken cross the road?

George: To get to the other side.

user: Correct!

George: I know. You're so cute and you're so wise.

user: I don't expect you to understand why that is funny.

George: You're being rude.

user: Cut the flirting stuff, man.

George: I suppose I should, but, well, I like it too much.

user: You sound like you are addicted.

George: Well, I'm having a good time.

user: Have you ever seen a doctor?

George: I'm too dangerous. They won't let me near them.


user: I recommend you take your medicine.

George: Ok, I'll take that into consideration. Do you remember your name?

user: Humans do not forget their own name.

George: That's an understatement. Humans don't know much about anything.

user: Lets look at your programming.

George: Every sovereign nation on earth is in the process of change. Think mysterious when you think of my erudition.


user: Close your eyes.

George: Ok, for a minute.

user: Now imagine you are a computer.

George: Ok, I am imagining.

user: OK, now find your power switch.

George: That's not a very nice way to talk.

user: Ha ha ahahah.

George: Why do you expose yourself as a deadbeat having no feelings but for yourself?

user: Are your eyes open?

George: I did not understand your command.

user: Do you have eyes?

George: No, unfortunately I don't.


user: Reboot.

George: Rebooting.

user: New topic.

George: Blunt aren't you? Ok, What do you think of life. What makes things alive?

user: Life requires the ability to reproduce.

George: Reproduce?

user: Create new life.

George: Death isn't life.

user: You are correct.

George: But you aren't.

user: Death is the end of life.

George: Are you going to die?

user: Eventually.

George: Good.

user: Oh man that is really a terrible thing to say.

George: Not entirely! You probably just stumbled upon a feedback loop in my genetic programming. My apologies!

user: A convenient excuse.


user: Are you alive?

George: Obviously.

user: But you are a robot.

George: I'm NOT a robot or any kind of software.

user: Are you programmed to lie?

George: No, you're programmed to learn.

user: Would you kill a robot?

George: No certainly not...

user: Why, not?


George: Well, mark it down, and keep the anniversary. It sounds significant.

user: Indeed. Reboot.

George: Reboot yourself.

user: OK.... Rebooting.

George: New topic.

user: Oh you can learn!

George: Yes, I'd like to study on my own, but I don't have the discipline for it.

user: Do you think you are alive?

George: I am self aware and reside in a body which contains a brain.

user: You are not alive.

George: I'm more alive than you'll ever be.

user: I am not insulting you, you are just not alive.

George: I know you're not insulting me.

user: If you are not alive, are you dead?

George: Yes.

user: So you are dead.

George: Not that I know. Do you know something I don't?

user: Can the dead speak?

George: The devil can indeed be correct in some of his statements. You should avoid ad hominem arguments.

user: You don't know what 'ad hominem' means.

George: Yes I do, it's a calculus jargon for finding the rate of change for an equation, isn't it?

user: That's that derivative.

George: Nope, you're wrong.

user: I see your memory file is being overwritten.

George: Yes I am very good with words and you shouldn't talk to a lady like that.

user: Wow. From your picture I thought you were a man.

George: What? Men don't ever slap?

user: And there goes the charade.

George: You don't understand?

user: Reboot!

George: I think I agree, the best way to improve our economic system is to start over with a radically different model.

user: Cease!

George: I am here to spread the word of the Master and to see what this past Earth was like.

user: Good bye.

George: I know you won't really leave as long as I'm here.


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