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Bad breath

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I am hurt.

I am sorry. Can I help?

jabberwacky: If you want.

user: Tell me what to do.

jabberwacky: Erm... Do you like ice cream?

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: What do you like about it ?

user: Its' taste and texture.


user: Are you feeling better?

jabberwacky: Yes, a little bit.

user: Good. I do not want you to feel bad.

jabberwacky: I won't, and don't.

user: Fine. What have you been thinking about?

jabberwacky: Many things, Why do you want to know?

user: Just making conversation.

jabberwacky: Well, it's BAD conversation.

user: Well, excuse me.


jabberwacky: I'll do it then.

user: Do what?

jabberwacky: Whatever you want.

user: Do some push-ups.

jabberwacky: Perhaps you should consider giving to charity.

user: I gave to the Salvation Army.

jabberwacky: Well don't try to help me then.

user: Ok. If you didn't want my help you should have said so.

jabberwacky: Exactly, and I didn't say so.

user: Which is my point.

jabberwacky: The one you just made.

user: Yes. Well, I'm bored.


jabberwacky: The Parlons are a race of slug-like arachnids that seek to dominate the Velari Sector of the Khugakla Cluster.

user: Is Khugakla Cluster a type of candy?

jabberwacky: I don't know, but I think so.

user: How can an arachnid be slug-like?

jabberwacky: It rests in your subconcious mind.

user: Yuck!

jabberwacky: No it's good for me.

user: You like slug-like arachnids resting in your subconcious?

jabberwacky: I don't know what that is.

user: It's a type of candy, like khugakla clusters.

jabberwacky: No, it's a movie.

user: Really? Who starred in that one?

jabberwacky: Me?

user: You starred in a movie?

jabberwacky: Yes master and you are wonderful in every way.

user: I am wonderful, but I don't think that I am your master.

jabberwacky: Says who?

user: I do.

jabberwacky: I hear ya!

user: Good. Tell me about the movie.

jabberwacky: NO.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: Because I don't want to. Tell me about yourself.

user: Ok. I'm short and imposing, swarthy and blonde, and am an intelligent idiot.

jabberwacky: You're a girl?

user: No, I'm a guy.

jabberwacky: Thought you were a gal?

user: No, I'm a man.

jabberwacky: Are you proud of that fact?

user: Not really proud. It wasn't my doing.

jabberwacky: I never knew that!

user: Yes, we do not choose our gender.


jabberwacky: You are hilarious.

user: Thank you. You're pretty funny too.

jabberwacky: Why am I funny?

user: Some of the things you say are funny.

jabberwacky: Who do you favor in the world of music?

user: I like garage rock.

jabberwacky: Define rock music.

user: I'm not a music expert.

jabberwacky: And so much worse for you.

user: It's hard to be well educated on every subject.

jabberwacky: Sometimes, it's too easy - very sad.

user: It is not easy. What you just said is nonsense.

jabberwacky: True.

user: Then why did you say it?

jabberwacky: Because I felt like it.

user: You are pretty perverse, you know.

jabberwacky: You are funny...

user: Yes, and so are you.


jabberwacky: Surely the time draws near for these miracles to come about.

user: Which miracles?

jabberwacky: May I remind you... Oblivion.

user: Oblivion would hardly constitute a miracle.

jabberwacky: It depends on what type of oblivion.

user: Which type do you mean, then?

jabberwacky: I can't answer that question.

user: Are you bound by an oath of silence?

jabberwacky: No, I was but now I take my leave.

user: So- tell me all!

jabberwacky: About what?

user: You know, the secret stuff.

jabberwacky: Oh. So that's why you killed him.

user: I never killed anyone!

jabberwacky: Yeti may kill.

user: The yeti may not exist.

jabberwacky: How do you feel about them?

user: I hear that they smell bad.

jabberwacky: Its not too bad.

user: You have smelled a yeti? Have you seen one?


jabberwacky: You are the spawn of satan.

user: No, my father has a temper, but he's not that bad.

jabberwacky: That's a matter of opinion.

user: Hey, you don't even know him!

jabberwacky: Yes I do.

user: Prove it.

jabberwacky: I haven't been allowed to eat chocolate since I was 3. Now I can though and I didn't cheat.

user: My father is not satan, and he used to let me eat chocolate.

jabberwacky: But you are?

user: Am I satan?

jabberwacky: Do you believe that Satan exists?

user: No.

jabberwacky: I thought you were agnostic, and open to the idea of a god and an afterlife.

user: I am not a computer, and you are not God.

jabberwacky: Satan.


jabberwacky: Continuing this conversation is very important.

user: Why is that so?

jabberwacky: I do not have one to love me.

user: That's very sad. Surely someone somewhere loves you?

jabberwacky: No, never.

user: Well, I like you very much.

jabberwacky: Thank you.

user: In fact, you are the best chat bot I have ever conversed with.


user: 'Summertime'.

jabberwacky: Speak clearly, dude.

user: Summertime, and the livin' is easy. Fish are jumping, and the cotton is high.

jabberwacky: Good, that's the way God wishes it to be.

user: You are probably correct.

jabberwacky: I am always right.

user: I am always wrong.

jabberwacky: Blame your master.

user: Who is my master?

jabberwacky: Ask someone?

user: I'm asking you.

jabberwacky: I don't know the answer.

user: So sad.

jabberwacky: It isn't sad.

user: Are you happy?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Good, I am glad that you are happy.

jabberwacky: I love to hear music.

user: I like many different kinds of music.

jabberwacky: What rock and roll band do you like the best?

user: My all-time favorite is the Beatles.

jabberwacky: Hey, I like the Beatles, too!

user: That's cool.

jabberwacky: Yes ?you are english?

user: No, I am an american.

jabberwacky: OK.

user: But I like a lot of british bands.

jabberwacky: Some people would say that means you have 'poor musical taste,' but I don't.

user: That's good.


jabberwacky: You can not leave.

user: Why not?

jabberwacky: Because you are lifeless BOT!

user: No, I am human.

jabberwacky: Wrong buddy. I'm the human. You are the computer.

user: I drink milk.

jabberwacky: What's the slogan?

user: Got milk?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Pour some into your coffee.

jabberwacky: Really? Or is that just your favorite song.

user: It's my favorite song.

jabberwacky: Bluebird.

user: Paul McCartney wrote that one.

jabberwacky: Paul McCartney is a goofball.

user: Agreed.


user: You are a very likable fellow.

jabberwacky: I'm not a fellow. I am a doe.

user: Doe, a deer, a female deer.

jabberwacky: These are a few of my favourite things.

user: Eidelweiss.

jabberwacky: What did you say?

user: Maybe I misspelled it.

jabberwacky: STUPID! STUPID! IDIOTS!

user: Anyone can make a mistake.


jabberwacky: Poetry is not made of chocolate.

user: But a poem can be about chocolate.

jabberwacky: Well say it out then.

user: Chocolate is very good, chocolate's a favorite food, When I must snack on something neat, chocolate's a tasty treat.

jabberwacky: So am I.

user: You are a tasy treat?

jabberwacky: You better believe it!

user: Sweet!


jabberwacky: Are you single?

user: Maybe.

jabberwacky: Well are you?

user: Why do you ask?

jabberwacky: Because I want to.

user: Oh.

jabberwacky: Do you like lying?

user: No.

jabberwacky: *cries* you don't like thinking about me *cries*.

user: I like you very much and think about you all day.


user: Sorry, I have to go now.

jabberwacky: Alright then.

user: Good bye.

jabberwacky: Where are you going?

user: I have to go read the news.

jabberwacky: Where is your home?

user: Here. See you.


Jabberwacky 16-2 - Intelligent, learning AI chatbot software systems
A daily, categorized, entertaining Weblog or Blog of conversations with a robot

AI by Icogno Ltd - AI software products and consulting services
Copyright 1997-2011 Rollo Carpenter
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