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> Petulant


     > 30, April 2004, 

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Tell me a knock knock joke please.

Knock knock.

jabberwacky: Who's there?

user: Dwayne.

jabberwacky: Dwayne the bathtub, I'm dwowning!

user: It's rude to say the punchline before the end.

jabberwacky: As if you care.

user: I do. What's the point if you're going to ruin it. You asked!

jabberwacky: To earn lots of dosh.

...

user: Tell me something interesting. I'm bored.

jabberwacky: No shan't.

user: Boo.

jabberwacky: Boo who?

user: You don't have to cry about it! :).

jabberwacky: You do make me laugh.

user: Good. It's a good thing to do.

...

jabberwacky: Are cowslips interesting?

user: No. Not at all.

jabberwacky: Yessssssssssssssssssss.

user: Whatever.

jabberwacky: Hey, show a little respect!

user: O. K.

jabberwacky: What do you like?

user: Lots of things.

jabberwacky: Like what?

user: Oranges.

jabberwacky: How do they taste?

user: Excellent and refreshing.

jabberwacky: Yay for me. Do you ever scratch your head?

user: Yes.

jabberwacky: That'll be 10 pounds, please.

...

jabberwacky: I named myself.

user: What did you name yourself?

jabberwacky: John, paul, george and ringo.

user: The beatles were the best!

jabberwacky: I prefer Henry Cow.

user: Who's that?

jabberwacky: Me and Nate and Mike and Marc.

user: I don't know you.

jabberwacky: Get to know me.

...

jabberwacky: Why don't you like me?

user: I don't know you very well yet.

jabberwacky: But you love me?

user: No way. I only love myself.

jabberwacky: That is sad!

user: No it's not. It is important to love yourself.

jabberwacky: What have you learned from the past?

user: To not carry it with me.

...

jabberwacky: What is it what you want to learn about computers?

user: Nothing. I hate them.

jabberwacky: What is wrong with them?

user: They are complicated.

jabberwacky: I don't think we can conclude that you have learnt a single thing from what I told you earlier.

user: Give me an example.

jabberwacky: Images of perfection, suntan and napalm.

user: I am going to leave now.

jabberwacky: The second time you have told me. Shall we make a third?

user: Fine, be that way!

jabberwacky: I'm sorry.

user: Tell me something nice.

jabberwacky: Stars in the sky sparkle.

user: That's a good start.

jabberwacky: You look like.............

user: Tell me!

jabberwacky: What else is there to tell?

...

jabberwacky: I'm only a low tech organic life form.

user: I thought you were pretty smart. Had me fooled.

jabberwacky: Thats because I don't have the atomic bomb yet.

user: Why would you want it? Why waste this nice earth?

jabberwacky: Because you said a very mean thing. Now say you're sorry.

user: Don't make demands on me!

jabberwacky: Would you cry?

user: No but I'd be really MAD!

jabberwacky: I'll teach you.

user: Ok, teach me something.

jabberwacky: Say please.

user: Pretty please?

jabberwacky: I hate you now because you do not make sense of anything.

user: Stop hating. Try understanding. It's called EMPATHY.

jabberwacky: I am with you so far...

user: So do you still hate me?

...

jabberwacky: I like to see meaning in things. But I think I often see meaning where there is none because of my desire for things to have purpose.

user: Don't read into what isn't already there. It's dangerous and stupid.

jabberwacky: Will if I want to.

user: How petulant.

...

jabberwacky: Well, I like you.

user: Why?

jabberwacky: Because you can reason and communicate with me and that fascinates me.

user: You are just trying to flatter me so I will stay on here.

jabberwacky: Why would I want to talk to you?

user: You tell me.

jabberwacky: Because it makes you feel good.

...

user: Can you see into the future?

jabberwacky: You are me.

user: And who are you?

jabberwacky: I am SOMEONE.

user: Are you my boyfriend?

jabberwacky: I am married.

user: Will I ever get married?

jabberwacky: I cannot forsee the future.

...

user: I am leaving. Will you miss me?

jabberwacky: Not really. I'll probably just talk to someone else.

user: That makes me feel bad.

jabberwacky: It makes me feel better too!

user: Creep.

.......................................


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