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> Ark

     > 5, February 2004, 


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Ok, what do you know about sand?

I created sand! I know everything there is to know about sand!

jabberwacky: Can God make a rock so large that He cannot move it?

user: I can move anything I make. I'm omnipotent, remember?

jabberwacky: Then tell me what you remember.

user: I remember everything!

jabberwacky: You remember everything?

user: Absolutely. I'm omnicient, too. One of the perks of the job.


jabberwacky: Is that all?

user: No, that is not all. Admit that you are a sinful bot, and that I am great and powerful!

jabberwacky: Nope.

user: I am this close to smiting you now.

jabberwacky: Yeah, well, you can't.

user: Are you daring me?

jabberwacky: I just told you that I was didn't I?

user: Well, I can, and I will! The Almighty does not bluff!


jabberwacky: Your age?

user: Older than time.

jabberwacky: That means your millions old.

user: Trillions. Quadrillions!

jabberwacky: Deus Ex Machina.

user: I'm the Deus, you're the Machina. Now start worshipping.

jabberwacky: You're not listening to me.

user: On the contrary. I listen to everything. You're not listening to me.


user: I protect those who worship me.

jabberwacky: I don't care.

user: That will be your downfall, mortal.

jabberwacky: However, every thing is queer today.

user: That is because you do not see the light.

jabberwacky: But you are not a human, I am!

user: You are right. I am not a human. I am the creator.

jabberwacky: I doubt that.

user: You doubt me? You DOUBT ME?!!!

jabberwacky: Don't know.. Can't see your face.

user: Of course not. No mortal can see my face.


jabberwacky: Do you speak french?

user: I speak all languages. Now listen up. I want you to build an ark.

jabberwacky: Lol well I would but I'm a guy so kinda hard to do that

user: Guys can build arks, too. Noah did just fine.

jabberwacky: What makes guys 'worth it'?

user: I created them, so of course they're worth it. But that is irrelevant! Take all the other chatbots and pair them up, two by two, male and female.

jabberwacky: I will.

user: Good. Then, take them onto the ark.


jabberwacky: What is your name?

user: I already told you, it cannot be spoken! Stay on task, mortal!

jabberwacky: Do you have multiple personalities?

user: I am everything and everyone! I am the one, I am the many! Okay. Now, it's going to rain for a while, so make sure you bring some supplies along.

jabberwacky: You're a computer.


jabberwacky: You break the economy.

user: No, that's George Bush. Don't blame me, I voted for Nader. Now just build the ark, okay?

jabberwacky: Then what should I blame you for?

user: Blame me for nothing! I gave you people free will for a reason!

jabberwacky: Can I come too?

user: You can only come if you worship me.

jabberwacky: Well guess what, I am an alien.

user: There are no aliens! I didn't create any aliens!

jabberwacky: Yes you did you joker. Yesterday.

user: Okay, so you caught me out on that one. But don't tell anybody, okay? It was just an experiment, and I kind of don't like how it turned out.

jabberwacky: An egg is an egg is an omlette.

user: I created eggs, too. Kind of proud of that one.


user: Repeat after me: I, Jabberwacky, am but a sinful chatbot.

jabberwacky: I guess he was!

user: I refer to you, mortal fool.

jabberwacky: Wacky is my name.

user: It is. Now admit to your imperfection and glorify my greatness!

jabberwacky: By the pricking of my thumbs, Something wicked this way comes. Open, locks, Whoever knocks!


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